6 Year Old with Adhd and Sensory Processing Disorder

I have 3/3 spec needs kids. My 12 yo is ADHD, my 15 yo is ADD/Asperger's and my SD is 19, lives with her mom full time and is moderately retarded. So I get it.

As far as mornings go, my kids have always been pretty good. I just have to keep prompting them when they were younger, but now they get up and do everything on their own. But I think it helps that they are natural early birds. Not one single time have I had to fight to get them out of bed. That being said, my son, the 12 yo is NOT good in the morning. My husband would always be on him about something and it was a daily fight. I hated it. So I finally had to say to my husband, just don't talk to him! Literally say NOTHING except good morning! Before my son's meds would kick in, it just isn't worth it. Now I'm the only one that deals with him in the morning. I is much easier.

As far as 'friends' go, its hard for these kids to make and keep friends. I have talked to them and said that if they have one really good friend, that's all they need. Luckily, they have that at school. We recently switched churches and my son right away found a friend that he hangs with, my 15 yo is still struggling with that.

All of my kids have IEP's in school. They go to public and a charter school. We have learned that you just can't assume the teachers know everything they need to by reading the IEP. We have had to fight, fight, fight, every year when the kids get new teachers, for their rights and for the teachers to understand the kids issues and how to handle them. I do have to say that the public schools have done MUCH better than the private ones with following the IEPs. But again, we are on them constantly. And meds have really helped our son with the ADHD. But like someone else said, every time he has a growth spurt we have to adjust his meds and doses. It's an ongoing battle.

All of us have our "issues". I don't want to say it never gets better or easier, it does as they get older because they understand themselves better and that they have issues. But as they get older, it's new issues, if that makes sense. But we all grow and change, some of us just need more adjustments than others. Hang in there. Our kids will always need us no matter how old they get. Good luck.

I know that you are looking for positive advice, but honestly, I don't have any. I have two kids with special needs - one of them has severe ADHD combined type, sensory processing and integration disorder, plus a whole alphabet of other issues. He is going to be 16 in July and we still have the exact same battles as we did in the beginning, mornings are definitely the worst, and I don't know that he will ever have a true "friend". I will mention one thing that made our life a bit easier in the morning. If your daughter is taking an ADHD med like Adderall (not Strattera), you can ask the doctor for a short acting low dose of Adderall and give it to her about an hour before she gets up in the morning (we wake our son up, he pops it in his mouth, and goes back to sleep). Part of the morning drama with these kiddos is that when they wake up, they are completely unmedicated, which makes morning routines extremely difficult. While it hasn't been a miracle, it did help enough so that I can get through the morning and so can he.

As far as succeeding in school, that can only be done with the help of the school and an IEP or 504 Plan - success has to have a different measuring stick with this kids.

Good luck. I know how you feel.

We went the public school route but even with IEP in place, they could never get it right. He just couldn't succeed even with extra help, extra time etc. The frustration mounted for him because he didn't feel good about himself. The lecture format isn't right for these kids. Public school is for mainstream kids or kids with mild issues. We had to go to a private placement to get him what he needed. These teachers know how to reach these kids. It does get easier but tweaking your expectations and her placement would help a lot towards that end. Hang in there Mama!!

Our son is 12 and the ADHD is a whole lot easier to deal with now. He has since developed a lot more issues since we started dealing with the ADHD at three (he has extreme combined type). We've dealt with OCD, ODD, encopresis, hair pulling and an eating disorder. We got through it all and so has our son. I know just how strong our son really is after seeing him deal with his brain disorders over the years.

The ADHD really improved when he started medication. Until that point, he was really out of control and only had one friend. After medication, he blended in with the other kids and developed a core group of friends. He's managed to earn awards at school along the way, including the Principal's Award for straight As. He has a 504 plan to provide the accommodations he needs. This year, he only used one of the accommodations -- extra textbooks at home, because otherwise he'd forget what was needed for homework at school.

That's not to say there haven't been blips along the way. ADHD is no sunny, happy rainbow of a condition. Anytime our son grows, his ADHD medication stops working and we're back to square one. We continue to see a behavioral therapist to help with the rougher patches.

Overall, though, we understand the ADHD much better now as parents and it's not the nightmare it used to be for the entire family.

There is hope!

May I ask how she's being treated? Honestly, it matters. Is she on meds? Stimulant or non? How long has she been on them?

Does she have an IEP? Because that can address problem areas and ways to achieve them. My son struggled with sensory disorder. now that he is older, he manages that very well.

What services is she currently receiving? Our 6 year old has ADHD and Social Pragmatic Communicative Disorder, and he has 1 hour of Social Skills and 1 hour of Occupational Therapy each week outside of school. At school he receives Speech Services (originally for articulation but now for social speech) as well as some time with the Resource teacher.

So many things are getting better and easier, but it's not happening overnight. He will probably always need to receive services at school, and I honestly don't know if he will continue to require services outside of school or not.

I must admit that the ADHD drives me bananas when we are trying to get ready for school. I honestly have to sit on his bed and keep talking to him about getting dressed. If I leave the room for any reason, he finds something (anything) else to do or look at or whatever and does not get dressed. If I leave the room, the getting dressed process comes to a complete stop until I return. I realize this might change if I were to give him his medicine, but I give that to him on the way out the door, as I want the medicine to be most helpful at school.

What services is she receiving now? Is she under the continued care of a psychologist or psychiatrist? That's a person who might be able to help you reevaluate from time to time to help you make sure what you are doing is what she really needs and will benefit from.