5 Yo DD Becoming Frightened of the Dark

ask her why she is afraid / did she maybe see something about the dark or did someone scare her. maybe it is what she is looking at in her room before she falls asleep. try moving her room around. we have what we call monster spray and when there is an issue we use it. all it is, is a water bottle with a 1/4 fabric softner and the rest water.
good luck and god bless you and your family!!

Good Morning K.,

Having trouble at night for most kids begins to happen when they start to understand more of what they see in the world around them. Each of my children suffered with this. For some, it was that they came to fully understand something as simple as a Disney movie, so we stopped allowing that child to watch movies of that nature. For instance, one son came to the realization that things die (he had a frog that died at one point). I began screening his movies and would not let him watch something unless he fully understood that there was going to be a death and then I held him as he watched it. His problem spanned from feature length movies to simple cartoons. I used to think that mothers never slept.

If your child comes running, it is not always because they lack the ability to be strong, but more because they need to have that human connection and to know that someone is there to face things with them. I tried to make it a balance. I would tell my kids that they could always come and get me if they needed me. Then if I thought they could brave it on their own, I led them back to bed (using words that I hope gave them strength), I prayed with them, and then I let it go.

If they just seemed to need a bit of comfort, I would hold them for about an hour and put them back to bed and then sometimes, if they seemed to hurt badly (which 5 year olds sometimes will), I allowed them to sleep with me through the night.

However, I have one child, who is fearless in every other aspect of his life. He is independent on all fronts and still at the age of 9, he wakes up in the middle the night screaming. He refuses to come and lie down with DH and I, since this all began when he was 5. He wants us to let him handle it on his own. Sometimes we just cannot, he is too emotional. We took him for a physical about 3 years back and found out that a lot of his problem had to do with his inability to breath through his nose. Since, we have noticed that he is worse when he is congested. He had surgery, was ok for a while and has developed asthma and bad allergies so the night terrors started up again.

The point I am trying to make is that finding a balance between empowering her and comforting her is the best thing for her, but if the problem persists after age 6, then take her to the doctor to see if there is not something else going on.

I can tell you this. I was so grateful that I held my children (even the one that fought me). We are so connected. But especially the one that fought me, because the problem was outside of his control. My grandmother used to say, "You only have so many opportunities to hold your kids before they grow up. Take advantage of every opportunity you get."

I wish you the best.

R.

Fears are normal this age, they are understanding their own inability to control everything in their life and that they can be hurt.
However with that said, empower her. Find out what it is she is scared of, Talk about if the lights are on the room is the same as if they are off.
Get a low watt nightlight that can stay on all night, one that comes on when dark and goes off with light is great. Leaving a lamp on isn't that safe.
Together research whatever she brings to the table that she thinks could happen in the dark. There are no such things as monsters, the windows are locked, reassure her you are down the hall and so on, check the closets, under the bed and so forth.
I am all about being sympathetic to childhood fears, everyone has them one time or another, however I think empowering a child to overcome them is the best thing we can do as parents.
When we enable them that only can esculate the fear, giving her an education and empowering her with knowledge helps wonders.
It is normal at this age though, tell her you understand and just want to help her overcome her being afraid.
Happy stories before bedtime help, silly stories she and you tell each other and so on.
Good luck and it will pass.

My 5yr old DD is going through the exact same thing. There was nothing we could really do about it. I think it's pretty common and something they will outgrow (hopefully! I really don't want to be escorting a teenage daughter to the bathroom...). My dd absolutely REFUSED to go to the bathroom without an escort (in broad daylight, with me no more than 25 feet away). She would also come to our bed (although that has stopped now) and she still won't go upstairs to play by herself (which she did with no problem when she was 3). It's getting better, but it's a slow process. My other daughter (7yrs old) never went through this, although she did come to our bed every night for a few months when she was 4. I hope you get some good suggestions here, because we've tried everything to convince her that there are no "garage aliens" or ghosts in the bathroom.