5 Year Son Is Out of Hand at School.

Make sure that there are no underlying issues at school -- how does the teacher behave toward him? Often boys, especially if they are rambunctious, get unfairly labelled as "bad" early and are treated accordingly, getting punished more frequently and more harshly than other children. What about the rest of the staff (principal, etc.) Are they interested in finding out more about what is going on? Any other caretakers in the school that you may not be aware about? I have had many experiences in which I will pick up my kid from day care to find him under the care of a person I have never met before. What are they doing with your kids? Any class bullies? A little boy or girl who is teasing him? Anyone acting inappropriately with your child (being mean, hitting, even inappropriate touching/hugging)?

Especially if he is well behaved at home, I would take a very, very close look at this school. Perhaps taking a day or two to spend at the school and observe the environment may make a big difference. Maybe drop by at an unexpected time, to really catch the staff at work when no parents are around.

Finally, I would try to talk to some of the other parents in the class. Anyone else having similar problems with their kids? if so, maybe you can team up with another parent to investigate the school together, and watch out for each other's children if necessary.

He is misbehaving at school because he can. He probably enjoys the comments or reactions from the other kids. What consequence does he have when he misbehaves? Obviously it isnt effective. What do you do when you learn of this? I would sit down with him and explain the importance of listening to the teacher and behaving. Then discuss what should happen to him when he gets home after misbehaving. Let him decide with you what his consequence should be..give him choices to pick from.
Then arrange with his teacher to notify you each day how he has been. Make sure you get the note from the teacher. My 5 y/o grandson stuck notes in the bookshelves when they were bad. The teacher sent good notes home with a sticker, so even though he couldnt read if he didnt see a sticker he hid the note.

You can always look in to a behavioral health agency. They have TSS/wrap-around to help children stay focused while in school and in the home if need be. (I am currently one)

Another thought would be to get a doctor's opinion on his behavior and see if medication or a change in diet might help. (been there too).

Good luck.

As a former teacher I would like to suggest that you and the teacher work together to come up with a school to home communication system (a simple smile face/sad face paper works great). This way you know how his day at school went. With this information you could come up with a reward/ consequence for behavior at school. For example if he gets a smiley face he can have a prize(dollar store toys work great) or extra dessert (whatever works for him), a sad face means no reward. I have seen where this works miracles in children at his age. After awhile you could slowly increase the amount of days he needs a smiley face to get the prize until he is having several good days without a reward. Good luck!

He's probably just trying to figure out the rules at school and testing them to see what he can do and what he can't. My grandson was kept in from recess because he and another boy were wrestling. They weren't mad at each other they were just having fun. Now they know the rule is no wrestling.

Set up a time to speak directly with the teacher because she should be handling all issues at school since it's her rules he needs to follow. Do not punish him at home for misbehaving at school. You can certainly speak with him but any punishment should be dished out by the teacher.

You didn't say what grade he is in - but if he's new to school (kindergarten) it could be adjusting to the classroom? Have you talked to the teacher or principal as well as other parents - it could be another child in his class that is a bad influence.

Why is there no authority figure at school? Where is his teacher? The teacher IS the authority figure at school, and your son must be taught that just because someone doesn't swat him, doesn't mean that he does not have to rollow their rules. I would conference with his teacher and the school counselor to get a behavior plan into place. Make sure that he knows you're aware of his behavior in school and that there will be a consequence at home for it.
Also remember that he is just 5. Is this his first time in a school setting? It can be overwhelming for kids to be in a big group suddenly, they can feel threatened by other kids infringing on their space, there is no place to go and calm down when you feel overwhelmed, they may have a hard time controlling the talking and playing when the teacher is teaching.
Find out the rules in the classroom and use similar rules at home.
Good luck!