5 1/2 Yr. Old Son Still Bedwetting at Night....

Hi S.,
I had a son that wet the bed until he was about 13. We tried many things. One thing you may want to try is the alarm. Its a sensor that goes off when it starts to get wet. The problem with that for my son was that he slept so soundly that nothing woke him - it just woke the whole family. He wore pull-up for a long time. Then we just got a plastic cover for his mattress and bought extra sheets. I usually changed the sheets at least once a night. It's exhausting, but they really can't help it. There is medication, but I didn't want to give him that. I hope that helps. I know it's very frustrating. Try not to make a big deal about it with him - he really can't help it.

My 5 yr old (daughter) actually wet herself daily at kindergarten. Our pediatrician shrugged it off, and said she was fine. .. . ??? We ended up self-referring to a pediatric urologist. She had chronic bladder infections, and we had to medicate her, and deal with it until she was 10.

One "trick" the docter had us do was to "double void" at night. have your child go to the bathroom 1/2 hour before bedtime and then again at bedtime. It helps the bladder to fully empty. (Our daughter's bladder only emptied half-way most of the time, which meant that all those 'cellular wastes' in the urine stayed in the bladder and caused infections. No pain, no fever, just bladder infections that made it impossible for her to hold her urine inside.)

Frankly, at that point in time, I wouldn't have worried about bedwetting, because I was having to send her to school with a change of clothes EVERY day. It was awful.

But I agree with your husband. Check with your insurance company and see if you need a referral to go to a pediatric urologist. If you can go in network without a referral, I would see a urologist, to be sure there isn't a problem.

From there, you can figure out how to deal with it. :-)

barb

You might want to consider a chiropractor. I know a great one in Exton, Pa. There is a connection with getting your body aligned and bed-wetting. I know he has helped a 16 year old who plays lacross who started wetting the bed.

S.
____@____.com

is this something he's always done? my son is 4 1/2 and still wets the bed A LOT. It doesn't matter that we stop drinks early or make him go to the potty a dozen times before he goes to sleep... it still happens. he always gets really upset and swears he didn't pee in bed, and i explain to him that it happens when he is in a deep sleep... i tell him before he goes to bed that if he gets up and has to potty to tell us or just go... hoping that would stick in his mind or whatever.

Their bodies/bladder are just not ready yet for nighttime dryness... i was a bedwetter until i was 8yrs old, so i just assumed my kids may be too. our pedi said that he will grow out of it and if he hits a certain age, then they will start to question it.

sorry i can't be much of a help since i am going through the same thing. but be reassured it's perfectly normal!

I am going to be interested in what people say. My son is 5 yo and has been potty trained since he was 1 1/2 yo. He never had any problems with that. He still wets at night, and when he does almost always leaks through the pullups. I just figure he is one of those kids who either has a small bladder, or doesn't wake up. I will look forward to what people say. And I do make him go before he goes to bed. I've tried waking him up at night when I go to bed to go, but he usually can't go. Good luck

My son also was a bed wetter. His lasted much much longer than 5. I think he was more like 9. By that time he no longer fit in any products made for kids. It also was very hard for hi to have friends over or go anywhere. Even trips to grandparents was rough and embarassing for him. And laundry WOW I finally found that there is a medication to help them. My son was a very sound sleeper and the message "gotta go" just didn't wake him.The meds help the body hold it longer and help the message get thru. I don't remember what the medicine was but I would do some research or ask your dr. It helped us.

With my oldest son it got to the point that we had to put him on medication for about a year.It was really bad almost every night and several times a night...poor thing.But after a year it cleared up...not sure if it was the medication or going up but either way it worked.
Good luck b/c i know the pain both on the parents side and the child.I also remember how embrassed my son was when it happened...he tired a few times to hide it but he did get over it.
If you get that worried talk to your ped about it.
J.

My daughter is 6 and is still wetting the bed. I have her last drink be at dinner time, about 2 hours before she goes to bed. I make her use the bathroom before she goes to bed, and sometimes I make her go again when I go to bed. She still wets the bed. I tried telling her that if she stayed dry a whole week I'd buy her the High School Musical toy she wanted. Nothing works. I think she's just not developed yet. I was having her wear diapers at night, but she kept getting UTI's, so I had to stop that. It's very frustrating, but I think they're just deep sleepers, or their bladder isn't developed yet. I think around 6 the doctor may recommend alarm pads to put on their bed. I'm going to talk to the ped about that when we go next.

My daughter is 5 1/2 and also is wet at night. She would wet through pullups too. I use Goodnights and they work very well. You can find them everywhere diapers are sold. They are gender specicfic and come in sizes determined by weight. I also have a plastic zippered mattress pad on the mattress (I think from JCPenneys). I do put a regular mattress pad over it. Sometimes she is totally dry; usually doesn't wet through the Goodnight but sometimes everything still gets soaked. You can also put down a soft bath/beach towel directly under him when you think he will be wet (if we were at a party late; had a late dinner etc). I limit liquids after dinnertime and have her go potty after dinner; before bath & before bed. Pediatrician said NOT to worry about it. Some children have bladders that aren't mature yet & are heavy sleepers. There is alos sometimes a family history of nightime wetting; (my sister in law and her children wet at night) Therefore don't know they are wetting. I tried waking her at night; it didn't work for us. I am very positive with her and explain it isn't her fault. She can change herself and she helps me change/ wash her bed.It's getting hard because her 3yr sister is getting up at night to go potty. Stay positive & good luck! D.

S.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news :-) but my second child, a girl, wet the bed from the time she was 3 years old till she was 11. I can sympothize with your frustration completely. Our pediatrician did not see it as a "problem" either, and we got no help from that area. I had to resort to buying the Goodnights....they come in bigger sizes....and they seem to work really well. No leaks. However, they do get expensive. I do agree with you, that you can not discipline your son for this.....I honestly do not think the child knows at all that they have wet the bed. We used to limit what my daughter had to drink past dinner time. We would also make sure she went to the bathroom right before bed time and still....she'd wet the bed most nights. I had even resorted to getting her up in the middle of the night and walking her into the bathroom to pee....she'd be in a stupor for the most part and have no recollection of ever going in the middle of the night. However, some mornings, even after doing all of that, she'd still wet the bed. I was told that in some children their bladder just takes more time to develope? Don't know if that's true or not? Luckily, my daughter outgrew this problem around age 11. Maybe you could press your pediatrician to look into this further....or have your son see a specialist? this is a huge problem to have to live with. It is especially horrible when they do get a little older ( I realize he is only 5 now)and start getting invited to sleepovers and birthday parties where you spend the night. Maybe there are some things now on the market to help chilren with this problem. Sorry I could't offer any "good" suggestions....but you are not alone with this...I know how frustrated you must be. Good luck.

S.,
I didn't experience this personally with my son, but his friends that would sleep over would need to wear pull-ups. This is actually quite common in boys especially I have found. My girlfriend finally got her son who was 7 at the time on a pill-no side effects, but voila it helped him stay dry all night with no accidents. Consult your doctor as to what the pill might be because I don't know the name, but there is something out there for him to take and I believe it was fairly a natural product. It really did work. Check with your doctor or a homeapath if your doctor does't go the more natural route. Best of luck with everything.
~D. M~

hi S., first and foremost, DO NOT EVER make him feel as though he is doing something wrong because children honestly have no idea that they wet the ed until they wake. My 7 yr old daughter still wets the bed and we have been to a urologist and have tried no drinks before bed, waking her in the middle of the night etc.... Bed wetting is hereditary, someone on your or your husbands side of the family use to wet the bed! My husband wet the bed until he was 12!! The problem is their sleep pattern. Is your son a deep sleeper? My daughter is! What happens is when they first go to sleep, it is a light sleep then the R.E.M (rapid eye movement) should come next, then deep sleep. Well with bed wetters they SKIP the R.E.M sleep all together. The R.E.M stage of sleep is when your bladder tells your brain to wake you up and go pee. Well since they are skipping that stage of sleep their brain doesn't wake them up. My daughter still wears sleep pants to bed so i dont have to keep changing the sheets. I have tried desmopressin (which is a pill) but that has not worked! There is a nasal spray that we will try next. Oh and my doctor didnt want to do anything at the age of 5 either, wait until at least 7 if you are going to try any meds. You could also try a sleep disorder doctor (which i have not yet) although i dont know what they would be able to do, maybe give suggestions about his sleep habits, i dont know! Well i hope this helped, good luck and hang in there i know it is frustrating!

My son was 8yrs old when he finally stopped wetting at night.
No fluids past a certain time will help. Take off the pads and diapers he wont realize he is wet. Use a plastic bed protector instead and take it as a day to day progress. praise him on the dry nights and let hhimm know that boys have this problem and that we will work together to help him.Tell your husband there is nothing wrong. He is aboy. alot of them just dont get the control until later years. You will be fne!

My son went from not wetting the bed at night to at age 5 wetting the bed most nights. He is 6 1/2 and still wets the bed a few nights a week. His ped., like yours, is not concerned yet. She said some boys go through this until age 8. She said there's nothing you can do, except limit fluids in the late afternoon, and even that doesn't always work. She also said, if he is not having accidents during the day, he should just out grow the bed wetting. I know it's frustrating!!! I never say anything to my son about it. They can't help it. Hang in there! This too shall pass!

My 10-year old son still wets the bed most nights, even after restricting fluids after dinner, going to the bathroom before bed, etc. He wears a pullup under his pajamas and often wakes up wet (sheets too). We do not make a big deal of it, because you're right, it's not his fault. He's a heavy sleeper, and doc said he'll grow out of it (it IS hereditary). Best thing I can suggest to save the mattress is a plastic mattress 'bag' available at Walmart (near where the pillows are). It is a complete bag that goes over the mattress. You'll be washing alot of sheets, but at least you won't be replacing mattresses! I think the mattress bags only cost about $6.00, too.

Good luck, he'll grow out of it eventually!

Hi S.,

I don't really have anything to add that has not already been said by others, but I wanted to be one more person to reassure you that it is somewhat common and that he will grown out of it. You are right in not wanting to punish or shame him in any way. That would only make matters worse. The best thing you can do is to be understanding, use a mattress pad, and wait it out.

Take care,
K.
P.S. I have also heard that there are hereditary factors involved.

S.,
I think his bladder probably isn't fully developed yet. Or I'm guessing maybe he's sleeping so deeply that the sensation of "having to go" just isn't waking him up. Have you tried waking him & taking him to the bathroom in the middle of the night (Or before you go to bed, if it's few hours later than him?). Waking & taking may not help develop his bladder, but it may make things a bit easier for you. Good luck! Also, do they still Make Good Nights for kids? They may be less expensive than pull ups.

I would talk with your pediatrician and see if he/she thinks you could use a urology consult. Although it may be perfectly normal, my friend's daughter had this problem and it turned out to be a bladder condition. It was corrected with courses of antibiotics and she is now sleeping through dry nights. It is worth looking into.

Hi,
I was just about to write the same thing. My son it turning 6 in a week and he still wets the bed. we have tried the nothing to drink after 6, going potty before bed, and waking him up during the night more than once. Nothing seems to work. I dont want to get angry at him but it gets trying when you have to change the sheets every day. He cant go to sleep overs and I even feel uncomfortable with him staying over the grandparents house because I dont want them to have to deal with the messy matress. I dont use diapers because I feel they pull the wetness away. I was hoping by him feeling the wetness it may wake him up and he will at least go to the bathroom and change then and maybe that would get him used to waking up on his own. NOTHING WORKS!!!! I feel so bad for him and I dont know what else to do. A few days ago someone wrote about their 11 yr old daughter still bed wetting and they mentioned taking away milk products and also using a tablespoon of peanutbutter before bed. I started doing both and have not seen any change. Please let me know if you get any good responses so that I may try them as well. Thanks!!!

I moved back to PA about 2 years ago. Both my ped in VA and the one here agree that the age when kids are able to sleep through the night without wetting is at least partially based on heredity. So if you or your husband were a little older before you were able to go through the night, that will effect your son. My daughter will be 5 this month and my ped said to continue to have her wear pull ups (or something) until she is dry for 7-10 days. Once that is the case, then try to go without. Otherwise it's a lot of work for the parents (clean-up, laundry) and could be upsetting to the child. I gather from talking to other moms that most kids we know around my daughter's age are still in pull ups, too.

I think you received a lot of great advice already and hopefully it helps to know that so many others are going through it as well. My 5 yr old son is in the same boat. At my 3yr olds well visit today I brought it up again and he reassured me with everything he has said in the past - not his fault, he is not lazy, under-developed bladder, heavy sleeper, hereditary, etc. He is not worried and said some kids go on for years and that at this age, he would not medicate or try the alarm underwear, etc. He did say that as long as this is a recurrent issue and he has not stopped doing it for an extended period and then started up again (which he hasn't), then there isn't much to do but be patient, not make them feel ashamed, etc. I know the cost gets crazy and the cheaper sleep pants just leak so that is frustrating. One thing I have invested in is the child size version of an infants sheet saver. I got mine from One Step Ahead and it goes across the bed and tucks underneath. It's cotton on the top and plastic below so it's waterproof. It's wide enough that it will catch the leaks even if your child moves in his sleep but it is not the size of the whole bed. The best part of this is that you do not have to strip the entire bed - just pull it off, wash it and tuck it back in. I think they are $20+ but a HUGE time saver if you ask me and so worth it. Hopefully our kids grow out of this sooner than later but in the meantime, just keep being supportive and doing the best to help him. The bedwetting pamphlet I picked up today also says to limit caffeine (soda, chocolate, energy drinks) as well as citrus fruits and juices (orange, lemon, grapefruit) as they can irritate the bladder. I wasn't aware of that but it doesn't apply to us so I am back to just being patient and looking for sales on Goodnights. Good luck!

First I would have the doctor check and make sure there isn't a physical reason why he is bedwetting at almost 6. It could be something as simple as an underdeveloped bladder. Then I would cut back on drinks about an hour before bed. Also you might want to just wake him up about halfway throught the night to go to the bathroom. I hope you have invested in a good vinal or plastic mattress cover to protect his bed. Even though the nighttime pull-ups cost a bit more you might want to stick with those, if he wakes up dry he can use it again...but they are more effective and more gender approiate than pads (which may not bother him now, but if anyone from his school finds out it will worse than pull-ups kids can be really mean!) I'm sure I haven't told you anything new. Sorry. Good luck and best wishes

For certain kids this just happens. The more stressed your family is, the more your child will believe he is doing something wrong. My daughter was over 6 before she was dry through the night.

Once again, every child is different!

D.

My now 21 year old son had enuresis (bed wetting) until age 10. It's a condition that can happen to children, mostly boys, up until age 12. I wish they made Pull Ups back then. It would have made life easier, lol. I would check again with your doc, or go to a different one. You never know. Generally speaking, at age 5 1/2 a child is not going to wet the bed continually. An accident will happen but not night after night. I agree with your husband that he should be checked. If he has enuresis, not sure if there's anything they do these days, but back with my son, there was nothing to be done until he grew out of it. He stopped by age 10 and went immediately to nocturnal emissions! *ugh* I think I preferred the urine, lol! All you can do is have him wear something while sleeping, no drinks after dinner and go to the bathroom before bed. That way there will be less in him to wet. If he makes a mess, he should help with the clean up. It's not a punishment but just his responsibility.

K. B
mom to 5 including triplets
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/harrisburgpachat

My only advice is to limit the intake of fluids after a certain time during the day. When my son was potty trained his last drink was at dinner and no liquids basically after 6:30. I made sure that he went to the potty before bed and I would wake him up to use the bathroom one more time when I was going to bed myself. I hope this gives you a little help.

J.

My daughter just stopped wetting the bed and she is 6 years old. I think the problem was due to the fact that she is a very deep sleeper. I also feel that it was due to hereditary. My husband and I were both bed wetters.

I am sticking with the heredity theory, because I have a 4 year old who is wetting the bed.

If this is something that he has always done, then I would say that he will grow out of it. If this is something that has just started, then I would make an appointment with a specialist, just to make sure that nothing medical is wrong with him.

Whatever it is, I am sure that he can not help wetting the bed.

Good luck