4 Yr Old Who Will Not Go to Sleep

I would try starting a "bedtime routine". I have a three year old that we have problems with sleeping and so I started a routine every night. First he'll go potty, then brush his teeth. Next, it's book time. He gets to pick out two books to read and by the time we're done reading them, he has calmed to the idea of going to bed. Sometimes we also give him comfort things that he wants to put in his bed with him. Some nights it's a stuffed animal, last night it was a few blocks. But this has seemed to work for us. Good luck.

I completely agree with Tashina, consistency is the key with children. I had the same problem when my son was around one, he refused to take naps at home because his grandma who watches him while I work would not make him take a nap. I finally had to put my foot down with my mother and explained to her how it is affecting him at home. She started making him take his nap again, the first time she had to let him cry for 45 min. But after that he got the point and he has slept good ever since. Now I put him down to bed and for his nap and he never makes a sound. It may be really hard because you hate to see your children upset but you have to remember that you are the parent and what your doing is for his own good, and for your sanity as well. Best of luck!

My 4 year old does the same thing! For at least an hour he is saying he is thirsty or needs to use the bathroom or just wanted to come and say good night and give me a kiss again. . .it is alway something! It is very annoying!
I have found nothing that works except making sure that he has gotten a drink and gone to the bathroom immediately before going to bed. And then when he yells or gets up I tell him he has to stay in bed that he had his 'nite-nite drink'. He still doesn't go to sleep but does stay in there talking, singing, and occasionally playing. . . Good luck with this!

I have a four year old who also does not like going to bed or staying there. He still gets up very early to sneak in our bed, but he is much better about going to bed at nite-nite time. Here are some things we do: warn him that bedtime is coming soon - this way he is prepared for the idea of going to bed, try to put him to bed at the same time and in the same way each night (for us, this is potty, prayer, kisses and hugs), also you may try playing some soft music. I have a samll CD player in my son's room and he likes to listen to Christmas music year round, the music helps him settle down and eases him. I think he really does not like being in a room by himself, especially when it is quiet and dark... the music helps and we also have to have a night light, and leave the door ajar to his room so he knows we are still there.
Best wishes to you....

He didn't get like this over night and he won't stop over night. You have to be consistant with him. You set the rules. He doesn't have to sleep when you put him in bed (you can't sleep for him and if he's not willing to close those eyes then there's nothing you can do), but he does have to stay in bed. Make sure there's not any toys or other source of amusement in his room. Make it as quiet and boring as possible, that should help induce sleep. And if he breaks the rules by getting up and roaming about make sure there's the same consequence everytime. It'll take time, but eventually he wil do what you want.

when bed time rolls around, let have a 1 snack, 1 drink, 1 story. then put him bed and turn off the lights. put up a baby gate across the door. that way you can hear him, but he will be safe. the worst that will happen is he will get upset and cry himself to sleep on the floor. evenually he will get used to the new routine and start staying in bed.

I think maybe you might try being very firm with him....tell him it is bed time.....and consistently put him back to bed. It might take 25 times of back to bed to get it.....but eventually it will happen. Try to do bed at the same time every night too....even at grandpa's. Consistency is the key....If he knows that you will let him get up....then he will get up. If he knows that no matter what mommy is gonna put him back to bed, then he will stay in bed.
Good luck,

I agree with everyone else - being consistent is the key - both at home and at grandpa's. If grandpa won't follow the plan, then you just have to keep him home for a few weeks until the pattern is established. Do the same short bedtime routine everynight at the same time. You might want to remove all toys and books from his room so it's dead boring in there (we had to do this with our son - we even removed the clothes for a few days because he emptied the drawers). Say goodnight and leave the room. I wouldn't worry if he's in bed or not... he can't be doing much in there with no toys. When/if he leaves the room, just silently walk him back to bed and then leave. Don't respond in anyway or engage him in conversation. If your son is super-stubborn like ours you'll be walking him back repeatedly for a few hours the first night. It does get better though. By the 4th night our son stayed in his room after we said goodnight. Part of our routine is to leave the room with the light on... he gets to 'read' in bed for 15 minutes by himself after we read to him and then we come back in to turn off the light and say goodnight. You could put a baby gate in the hallway or top of stairs if you are worried about him roaming around at night.

Remember the 3 things parents has no control over.... eat, sleep and poop. You can't force him to sleep, but you can force him to stay in his room. With the light off and complete boredom in his room, our son usually falls asleep within a few minutes now. However, when we started there were nights he'd be up late (his body clock was set to staying up later) and we'd fall asleep while he was still awake (baby gate kept him at his end of the hallway so there was nothing he could get into).

Good luck!