4 Year Old Daughter TERRIFED of the Dark

Night light for night. Glow sticks are good, too. Get her a battery camping lantern (my son has a Scooby Doo lantern). She can light it and carry it and it will sit on the floor or counter and give off a pretty good light. Some weekend, camp out in the living room. Watch a movie, eat popcorn, then put out a lot of the lights and make finger shadow animals. Play with the light and the dark. It will take time, but if she can play with it eventually she should lose her fear of it.

HAs your daughter diplayed ant other unusual fears?Sometimes it's just a phase and will pass,sometimes it is a sign of something more serious. If the behaviour continues I would ask her Dr. about it.

I'm a mom to a 12 year old boy, a wife of 15 years, a teacher for 11 years, and my degree is in psychology/child development.

I would continue to support her and reassure her that you are there to keep her safe. Don't try to use logic and lots of discussion - this isn't about being logical; it's emotional. Maybe something has changed recently in her world that is making her feel less confident and secure. Perhaps, you should try some pretend play where she "attacks" the monster, so that she feels empowered. At any rate, try giving her lots of emotional support when she needs it. Just leave a light on or place a lamp in the bathroom for the next 6 months or a year. For the room darkness, get her a night light, or a dim lamp. I've seen a turtle lamp at Hobby Lobby that gives off a faint yellow glow. I've also seen a lamp that looks like an aquarium with fish scrolling by. When she awakens in the middle of the night, take her back to her room and tuck her into bed.

We ended up having to do the sleeping bag on the floor of our bedroom because our son had night terrors and sleep walking. He didn't decide to start sleeping in his bed until he was almost out of 4th grade. I never thought it would happen, but one day he told me that he wanted to try sleeping in his own bed the next night.

Also, consider any medications that may interfere with sleeping. It turns out that my son's years of night terrors and sleep walking were mostly due to taking Singulair. I never knew that was a possible side effect, and when he turned 12, I said something to the peditrician about him being too old for sleepwalking and he said we should have taken him to a neurologist a long time ago. Long story short, we took him off the Singulair, and he hasn't had a single episode!

Good luck!

I think all kids are afraid of the dark at one point or another. I got my son a "Glow Buddy":
http://www.amazon.com/MOBI-70175-TykeLight-Portable-GloMa...

This thing is awesome. I tell him that "Glow Buddy" keeps the dark away. He can even put it in the bed with him which makes him feel secure. It's a pricey night light, but it's worth it. We are on our second one now after we wore the first one out.

Hope this helps!

I agree with the idea of giving her a flash light or that glow toy someone recommended, I have three boys that have all gone through this a few times in their own ways, and I've always used flash lights night lights and leaving the closet light on, as far as her coming to your room, take her back to her room, my kids loved sleeping on the floor, so that trick didn't work for me either. if my kids come in my room at night they pretty much know I'm going to tell them to go get back in bed, but my 4 yr old I'll get up and walk him back to his bed. and if I had to, I'd leave a dim light on all night. Chances are she wont go to college sleeping with the lights on, as far as the daytime fears part, that may be because she can't reach the light switch... most kids fear what they can not control and if she can't reach the light switch herself then that is something to be afraid of, I have to leave all the bathroom lights on in my house for my little one or he wont go in there. I also have a motion sensing night light that I use, which she might like, it could give her some control over the darkness, but still allow her to get used to the darkness, in an environment she can control, kinda like the flash light but without the batteries that have to be changed every other night because they sleep with the light turned on all night :)

sorry if I rambled to much but just thought I'd throw out a bunch of ideas, you never know what will work...

First off is she going to school (kindergarten) if so some of the kids there could be scaring her, or even one of your own relatives. Ask her who told her something is going to get her? Another thing you can try is what they call a (dreamcatcher) and hang it over her bed for at night. Tell her it takes all the bad out of her room and nothing will harm her. You can even put one in the bathroom. I don't know if you have seen them but they are round with woven string around the inside, feathers' either on one side or the other and a little figure in the centre. I did this with my son who used to have nightmares' everynight and it worked. Whether its because it is a strong belief in the Aboriginal Culture and it worked or it just worked by telling my son that with it there no harm would come to him. You certainly aren't sounding harsh, it is so frustrating when your trying to think of "where did this come from". I honestly believe in the Dreamcatcher, so as I said tell your daughter what it does, and put one in the bathroom and her bedroom. Sometimes we have to use reverse physcology on our little ones' I wish you lots of luck but I myself truly believe in the Dreamcatcher. They are basically sold in little trinket shops, I've even seen them at the Dollarstore. Let her pick 2 of them out so that she is thinking I like this one and it will help me. You may even find them in your grocery store. Show her the little circle in the centre and tell her this is where all the bad goes. Hang the one in her bedroom from the ceiling so that its over her bed. Even if she can reach it, thats fine. It worked for me and I do so hope that it will work for you. The one in the bathroom maybe hang it right beside the light switch or on the door as you walk in.

My children haven't had any daytime fear of the dark so I don't have any experience to share. Whether or not you "confirm her fears" they are real to her. I would let her have a flashlight so she can use it if she feels she needs the light. She could use it in the bathroom before she turns on the light. She could use it at night in her room when she gets scared. BTW, acknowledging her fear is not the same as confirming there is something to be scared of.

She's old enough now that she should be able to talk to you a little bit and maybe tell you what she's scared of. It's probably monsters or something similar. After that, I'd go on an exploration during the day of her bedroom and the bathroom with the lights off. Take a flashlight with you, hold her hand and show her around in the dark.
My daughter is 7 now and still sleeps with a night light. I'm not particularly worried about it, not liking the dark is a common problem with kids. It's just something to work through. I personally told my daughter, when moved into our new home that I had scared all the monsters away when we moved in. But even so we checked under the bed, looked in the closet, etc to see that there were no monsters. She still wants the night light, but doesn't seem particularly concerned anymore.
Hope that helps.

Several ideas. In my grandsons room at my house, I have one of those flat large night lights. His mattress is on the floor, so it's easy for him to use it to "read" by. After we read stories I let him look at the books by himself and sometimes he will fall asleep on his own. I also have a bright light in the bathroom, if he has to go potty. You could also have a lamp on in the room. You have conversations with her dolls/stuffed animals about the room and all the wonderful things in it. Pretend the doll tells you she is afraid and suggest to the doll that your daughter is very brave and will watch over her. Ask your daughter if she can "tell/read" stories to her doll. It's amazing how using another toy (in our case it's a "little bear" puppet). After she goes to sleep you can turn off the lamp but have a bright night light in the room so she can find the bathroom in the night (she can also take her doll with her for company).

Also as encouragement, my daughter--in-law has a star chart on a black board. If he stays in his room (doesn't go in mama's room) all night, he gets a star. After 10 stars he gets a small toy. He earns stars for his bravery.