21-Month Old Son Throws Toys down the Stairs

I have my son help pick up. Most of the time he only picks up a few of the toys, but if you are consistent with it, It will get to the point that he doesn't throw as many, and picks them up right away when he is done. It is part of learning cause and effect when he throws them, picks them up and all.

I know you're probably done with this but I have one more idea: If you can't beat 'em, join 'em. Stick with the soft toys and put a basket at the bottom of the stairs. Help him aim for the basket and cheer when he makes it. When he's done, clean-up time will be a whole lot easier, and he'll be learning that cleaning and organizing can be play.

Limit which toys he can throw on stairs and make him pick up the toys. We do similar things with our son he can only do certian things with certian toys. Ex: only throw soft balls in house, hotwheels are allowed on coffee table but no others, etc

Maybe get a slinky ?

Have you tried taking all of his toys away? Explain that he will get 1 or 2 toys back for every day he goes without throwing a toy down the stairs. Make sure you take the toys away as soon as he throws them, though, so he can make the connection.

The biggest thing is consistency. I would take the time to just watch for him to throw them and put him in the corner. When he gets out of the corner, do it again and again and again, until he learns. Don't do anything else that day, just watch him and let him learn. If you walk away to do something else, he would probably start again and then believe he got away with it.
G.

Have you had him pick up the toys? My daughter is 21 months old and if she makes a mess she needs to help clean up. You can make it fun, sing the clean up song, or sometimes she doesn't want to and I will walk over with her, make her pick it whatever the toy is up and put it away, I put her hand down and if she doesn't pick it up I wrap my hand around her hand and the object and tell her what a great job she did!

Children go through different stages of discovery. Our son started throwing toys and pushing toys under doors and such then peeking under to see where they were and why they didn't come back. It's a spacial relationship and develoment milestone.

They are discovering noises, cause and effect and that objects exist even if they don't see them. (object permanence).

Our son started learning this a few months ago when he threw food over the side of the high chair but realized it was still there when he looked over the edge. Or saw his Hotwheels still existed even though he pushed them under the closet or bathroom door. It's how they learn about objects, sounds and the world around them.

You may limit the noise or damage to your home buy buying soft balls he can throw down the stairs, but these may not be as fun for him. I agree with other moms on the fact he isn't too young to pick the toys up himself or at least start by having him help you pick them all up.

When our son started to enjoy throwing toys we got him two sets of balls from Target. One set was colorful raquetballs, I think there were 20 in the set for $5, also a great tool to teach his colors. And another was a small rubber set containing a soccer ball, basketball and football, also $5.

Just the right size for his small hands and feet but not made of metal or plastic that would hurt furniture, the walls or the baby.

Theresa,
Your little guy is smart! We so underestimate our little ones' ability to understand. Remember Helen Keller? Went blind and deaf at 6 months? Well, she knew the word "water" at that age, because that is precisely the word that finally opened her world up to her.
If they could only talk as infants, I think we would be astounded. So relate to him with the presumption that yes, he does know what he's doing, he knows what it means when you tell him not to...he's simply choosing to not do what you tell him.
You've gotten several really great suggestions; choose the ones that you're comfortable with, try them one at a time, until you find something that works for him! Happy mothering!!
J.

I agree with all the other postings about discovery, etc., but if you keep doing this you'll be his maid for life! How about using this activity as a reward if he's "good" or take it away if he's "bad" and then find a way to block off the stairs so it becomes something special to do, not an everyday drive-you-crazy kind of thing. just a thought! good luck, and remember if this is as bad as it gets, you're probably in pretty good shape! :-)

T.-Is your son throwing these things for attention? Even negative attention is still attention...Pick your battles. If you ignore it he may give up. I also have to wonder if he is just trying to use a new skill. This is the age where children develop large motor skills -redirection might work, "son, it's not ok to throw toys someone might get hurt. Let's get a ball out and practice throwing"
21 year olds do understand discipline-make him pick up his own toys at the bottom of the stairs..won't do it leave them there..see what happens. Good Luck! H.

I am laughing right now because I can totally relate! Our son loved and still does love to throw things down stairs. At our house though, he is gated into the living room so he throws things over the gate. From the time he started walking really well, about 14 months, until about 21-22 months, I had a pile of toys behind the gate every day. He would also throw food over the gate which our dog, stuck on the other side, loved. I learned to only allow him free roaming with dry foods and tried to get him to keep the throwing down to soft toys. Since he turned 2 he still likes the throwing sometimes but he is so caught up in the wonders of being able to talk that I think he is forgetting to throw:). One general fix for almost any toddler boy (in my experience) is to take them somewhere they can run and wear them out. We like the zoo, the park, the children's museum or just running around the neighborhood a few times. Good Luck!

First off I hope you're using a gate or something so that there's no danger of him falling down the stairs himself. :)
I think him watching the toys go from himself to the bottom of the stairs is kinda showing him what cause/effect is. He should be able to only throw toys that are meant to be thrown for example, balls. Is your downstairs a finished basement or just a basement, etc or what cause we have a basement but it is finished, carpeted with another living room down there and we do keep some of our two year old's toys down there for when he's downt here playing with his siblings. He brings what toys he wants back up with him if he wants otherwise they stay pretty much where he throws them. I don't really think your son throwing his toys downstairs is a huge deal, just let him have his fun and I think he'll get bored with it or you can give him other activities to do as well.

My take on this is very different...I believe in relationships with all things....I took ALL the toys away and only provided one to play with...that was pretty boring after awhile...then they would have to trade me for a new one....I usually pretended to examine it for "ouchies" and told them the toy was crying or sad...I asked what they did to it?...My little ones usually had a guilty look on their faces...I traded it..but with instructions....I told them to take care of it...or they couln't trade any more and all the toys would be sad...now...the toys are cared for...and the house is quieter....hope you find peace as well.
-K. is still in the making....

Hi T.!

My daughter does this, too (she's 18 months), so I can't tell you how to stop it! Is there any way that you could just leave the toys in an area downstairs? Maybe you could just keep a few stuffed animals in his room, so even if he does throw them, they won't break and it won't be such a pain to clean up. I don't personally think that 21 months is too long for a one-minute time out, so I wouldn't worry about that. But if this toy-throwing is causing you stress, it might just be best to remove the toys. A stress-free day is worth it.

T.,
Try this: Put a bucket at the bottom of the stairs and have him aim. Do this for a week or so and then move the bucket upstairs. It is so much fun for little ones to toss their toys into something. Hopefully this will help alleviate the stairway thing.

Something kinda similar, my 19 month old daughter used to pull out all of the diapers from the diaper drawer. I started having her toss them into a box instead of all over the floor and then we would toss them back into the drawer together. She eventually stopped pulling them out of the drawer.

With a situation like this, he probably wants to see what he can do; like explore himself. The best thing to do with things like this is to let your child embrace his strengths. If you don't like the outcome of what he can do, get creative and go down to his level.

A.

Honestly, I'd pick my battles. What happens when he throws them all down the stairs? Is he left with nothing to play with?

My daughter started picking up her own toys at about 18 months. There is no reason that he can't clean up.

My daughter loves to do the same thing, she's 21 months old. I get her to just throw the stuffed animals down the stairs, that way there's no damage and she still has her immature fun! Try getting him to limit what he throws down the stairs, it's a good compromise.

Hi,
My son who is now five went through a similar thing. He loved to trow things. Toys, shoes, hats. He even thought it was a game if a grown up picked the object up and gave it back. I was frustrated until I read that kids learn something about how the world works by trowing things and watching them fall. NOt that it is not annoying to us. I would just limit the nunmber of things he can through like you said less to pick up but other wise it is just a phase that goes awway on its own.
Good Luck.
L.

Have him clean them up. You hold his hand in yours and grasp the toys he throws together and clean them up. This is a phase and it will pass. Have you heard of MOPS? It's a fun support group for Mothers Of Pre Schoolers and a great place to meet other Moms. MOPS.org is their website.

T.
your son is smarter than you know and he is testing you!! I have a 18mo daughter and what I do when she does stuff like that is take her favotite toy away( in a place that she can see it, but not get it) then she earns it back. I also put her into time out for 1min and then we say sorry to the toy or to her older sister whoever or whatever she need to say sorry to! It has worked for me! Good luck
A.