15 Month Old Question

Updated on November 09, 2007
K.B. asks from Fishers, IN
13 answers

My daughter is very well behaved, whines a bit but other than that, it is her passion for exploration where I am at a loss right now.
She has exhausted all her resources at her ground level. I thought teaching her that was a challenge. Now she wants to constantly be picked up to grab all the remaining things she hasn't explored. The light switches, bahtroom & kitchen counter, dressers... The worst is I have a 4 month old so when she screams and cries because I tell her no, or walk away (sometimes I explain, others I say not toys) she wakes him up, which just annoys me.
Any suggestions?
Worst of all, she is a baby that has a real bad oral fixation, everything in the mouth no matter how much I tell her not to, crayons, dirt, wood chips, licks swings, posts, cars.... loves to taste, eat and chew everything including her books :)
Please help!
Amy

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So What Happened?

Thank you so much for all your ideas!
I know my daughter is very very easy compared to many I have heard of. My sister's is a handfull and laughs at me when I saw she's throwing a "tantrum" since they really aren't bad.
Sometimes I just get really tired but I know she is easy and that my son will be much more active.
I really appreciate all the ideas you have given me. I am going to try them and buy the book recommended for more ideas. I have also started taking her a class Wendesdays and in February she's going to a music class at meridianmusic.com (once she's 18 months) to keep her stimulated. I am not sleeping much with the baby and I think this soemtimes makes me feel overwhelmed since I can't dedicate as much attention to her as I'd like.

Thank you for your kind words of advice and encouragement!!
Amy

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S.D.

answers from Indianapolis on

Here's just an idea, Put some of her small toys in clear containers just out of her reach. She can then see what is in the containers, point and ask for them, get them down and play with them. Could create some "new" activities with "old" toys plus, will teach her to ask for what she wants.

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K.B.

answers from Chicago on

Have you thought of putting a sturdy kitchen chair in a location that is safe? Like by a light switch? What about getting some of those collapsible tunnels kids can crawl through?
I also agree that this age is intense. My Sylvie was a handful starting at age 15 months and she's calmed down oh so much now. She's 22 months and no longer throws as many temper tantrums and she can communicate better.

For quick easy "no brainer" ideas that I never would have thought of try "The Toddler Busy Book." I even saw it in the grocery store the other day! There are also books like 365 days of things to do but I love the toddler busy book. It has a quick sketch and list of materials and all activities are consise and easy! Things like playing with a set of refrigerator magnets on a cookie sheet or sorting things into muffin tins. I used these a LOT when I had baby #2 and if felt really good to know I was still putting effort into making my firstborn's days good (plus it was also winter so you really do lose half of the potential daily activities!)

K.M.

answers from Chicago on

Amy:
You have a very bright child, although you may not see it that way now. My son was the same way and now at 10 is still very inquisitive, smart and will probably be some kind of computer analyst. I was worried as well, but more for his safety of putting things in his mouth that could harm him. I had 2 other young children at the time and it was difficult to always watch him. That's when I switched my household products to all natural because you never knew what he was going to get in to. He was born 9lbs so he was a bruiser and strong enough to get through the baby locks back then.

Not to worry about this phase as you have been told here as well, just about what dangers she may find. Do your best to put anything well out of her reach that she could get in to. Anything that has gadgets, stacking, different sizes, shapes and colors is always appealing. You have a genious in the making so don't fret, just be safe and you will have piece of mind. The baby is more resilient than you think. They will learn to sleep through much if it is consistent. We tend to overcompensate for things that seem bigger than what they really are. I've been there, learned and can pass this along to you as well. Your children will be whatever they become as long as there is love, laughter, learning and then comes peace. Watch your precious girl as she sleeps. Really look at her and be reminded what a gift she is - some days it's hard but trust me, they grow up so fast. You are a good mother and we ALL are learning every day. May you have the strength to wake up every day and be the parent that you were meant to be. Have a thankful day.

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L.D.

answers from Chicago on

This is completely age appropriate and probably won't stop for some time. My son is two and will still put things in his mouth. This is how they explore.
Please provide her the ability to explore-put a stool by the light switch and she'll be out of your hair for hours. Put a noise machine or fan in your baby's room to eliminate some of the noise, but remember that toddlers are very self centered and do not have the ability to control all of their actions. We can't expect them to "behave properly" or "be a good girl" at all times. Way too young for this. My daughter is 4 months and is learning to sleep through my son's noises.
Put a cabinet inthe kitchen for her with pots, containers, empty food boxes, hot pads, spoons, etc and she'll love it.
Let her explore and she'll learn and grow from it. I hate to say it, but it'll probably be harder with your son when he's a toddler.

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A.P.

answers from Lafayette on

My daughter had (and sometimes still does) an oral fixation. She too would put rocks, dirt, crayons, anything in her mouth. Even at 3 she will chew on her blanket or the occassional rock. The only thing you can do for that is keep telling them "not in your mouth" and keeping those items out of reach. It really does get better. She does put less items in her mouth and less often.
For wanting to explore higher items, I would let her do some of it. I would let my children turn on and off the lights for me. I would pick them up to do that and then put them down. Reminding them that they are "big kids" for helping me and "big kids" cannot be carried all the time if they get upset about being put down. Letting her help in the kitchen is a great thing also. I will let my children pull up a chair and stir the batter. (Of course, you want to remind her that she can only do that when you are around.) Letting her do some of it is wonderful on her motor skills too.

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A.

answers from Chicago on

Mine were 2 under 2 so I've certainly been there! What worked for me was making the older's environment more fun and challenging - Melissa and Doug kitchen stuff, small play tent, "hiding" toys at her level for her to seek out, find and play with. Tupperware, shoe boxes, etc can become your best friend! I also had her help me cook and do other things around the house to quickly distract her. Hope this helps!

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C.W.

answers from Chicago on

Am I missing something here?
A 14 month old, ALWAYS, will put whatever they can find into their mouths. This is normal and how they explore. In fact if they do not, there might be a problem. One of the first rules, with regard to this age, is you would never leave them around anything that could cause harm. Wood chips, crayons, dirt....are you kidding? I find this disturbing because children can choke, become very ill or even die from this and just for acting appropriate for their age. They need a controlled and safe environment.

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M.S.

answers from Chicago on

Hi Amy,

My 18-month-old is the same. It's just developmental and she'll grow out of it. I know it's not easy, especially with a baby in the house, but there's not much more you can do than what you are already doing.

I have a 5-year-old who acted the same way and she grew out of it by 2 1/2.

Be consistent, be safe and keep telling yourself that it will get better. :)

Best of luck,

M.

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C.

answers from Chicago on

Welcome to the "terrible twos"!
I agree with the other posts...it is a phase she will get through and you just have to keep reminding her what is okay and what is not okay and hang in there! My pediatrician was just saying at my son's 24 month appointment that terrible 2s is actually about 15-24 months. I was telling him that my son was SOOO much better emotionally and with his strong will since about 22 months and I was hoping it wasn't going to get worse again with age 2 (since we barely noticed terrible 2s with my first son but no way anyone could miss it with the second boy). He said terrible 2s is the second year of life as opposed to 2 years old. I mentioned it to a friend and they said their peds just said the same thing at their daughter's 15 month appointment (and the next week she started with the tantrums). So hang in there...
As far as the oral fixation, I care for a child who does the same thing...tries to eat sidewalk chalk like a popsicle, tried to lick a spot of dirt off the driveway after I told her not to touch it last week, tried to eat rocks, dirt, etc. Same thing. She is now 22 months and MUCH MUCH better with it. I don't think there is much longer to it, so hang in there with that too. Some kids are just more oral than others. Just keep reminding is all I can say...

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K.C.

answers from Chicago on

14 months old is a very "hands on" age from what I recall. My only advise to you is regarding the oral fixation. We use "chewy tubes" for my older son. They cost about $7 and can be ordered at www.beyondplay.com/

It helps a lot with this issue no matter what is causing it. If it works you may want to get a few so you are never without it.

Good luck and try not to get angry when your daughter wakes up the baby. It's going to happen a lot no matter what you do. I use a Homedics sound machine to help minimize this issue. You can find them at Linens-n-Things.

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S.

answers from Chicago on

I feel your pain. My children are 3 and 16 months and did the same thing when they were the ages of your kids. My only suggestion is to get out of the house and have your husband watch the kids more often to keep your sanity and understand that this is just a phase and will pass. Not soon enough but it will pass. Hang in there. Isn't having kids fun???

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W.O.

answers from Chicago on

I can see how frustrated and annoyed you are. This is all age appropriate behavior. The best thing for you to do is to make the best of it. Instead of exhausting yourself all the time trying to tell her no or keep her from doing things. Use the energy to find thing she can do to satisfy this need of hers. Keep away things that are dangerous or you don't want destroyed until this phase is over. I have many books with teeth marks on them, and when I look at it now I smile thinking of how cute my dd was at that age. If she likes to taste things, why not set up a bunch of things she can taste, like lemon or other strong tasting things. For your baby, get a sound machine, that was a life saver for both of mine, and still use it today with my 4yo.

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D.K.

answers from Chicago on

I have a daughter who is almost 4 and a 19 month old son - and I assure you that putting things in their mouths is a very normal and essential part of their development. It is a stage and it should start to pass in about three months. Take heart! As for the tantrums, every child is different but sometimes just firmly telling them what you need to, making sure they're somewhere safe and walking away for a minute helps.

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