1 Yo Boy Standing in Crib... Won't Sleep

Updated on July 10, 2008
K.B. asks from Cumberland, RI
11 answers

My son was an awesome sleeper. We sleep trained him and did his little "bedtime routine." Now that he can stand, he stands in his crib instead of falling asleep when I put him down. For a few weeks we've been comforting him, rubbing his back, shaking his crib a little, etc. But we want him to learn to self soothe. The Cry it out method worked great with Kyle when he couldn't stand. We tried it last night and he cried for and hour and a half before falling asleep on the rail of his crib while standing. I REALLY want him to relearn to soothe himself and be able to fall asleep on his own. Has anyone been through this? Has anyone done the CIO method at this point? How long did it take? I'd love to hear your stories.

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H.Z.

answers from Boston on

I don't think the question is "has anyone been through this", but more like has anyone not been through this??? I have three boys and they all went through this stage. It is very normal...even with the "good" sleepers. And just remember this too shall pass. He is just excited that he can see the world from a different angle and doesn't want to miss a beat. I would just go in there every 5-10 minutes and lay them back down, resettle them and leave the room without really speaking. After awhile they got the hint that it really and truly was sleep time. And they all went back to being "good" sleepers...my youngest one is even better now!

Good luck!

H. (SAHM to 3 boys 4 1/2, 3 1/2 and 12 mths old)

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L.L.

answers from Boston on

my 1 yo daughter did the same thing when she figured out how to stand up in the crip-- she didn't really do it at night, mostly during naps...it seemed to be a phase that eventually ended when the novelty wore off! With the naps-- I'd try to put her back down two or three times and if after 20+ minutes or so she wouldn't go down, I'd get her out and we'd try again in an hour or so.

Like I said, it seemed to be a phase and she doesn't do it anymore unless she's really not tired. Be patient- hopefully it will resolve itself. I'm not a big CIO fan-- it never really worked for us!! Everything has so far seemed to pass on its own, no matter how frustrated I'd get!

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L.B.

answers from Boston on

My daughter just turned 13 months and when she first learned to stand I was getting frustrated because she wouldn't lie down, until I realized that the task of learning to stand comes earlier and much easier than the task of getting back down. He's probably screaming for you for help to lie back down because once they're up - they get stuck! Just have patience and try to teach him to get back down on his own. After a week or two it won't be a problem anymore!
Good luck!

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R.F.

answers from Boston on

Hi K.
My first thought after reading your request was "does he know how to sit back down?" When babies first learn to pull up and stand they can't figure out how to get back down on their own.

That being said and if that's not the case then maybe he's just not tired yet when you put him to bed. Try putting him to be a bit later and see if that works. It is a novelty to most children that does wear off eventually but I know it is frustrating at the time!!!

S.K.

answers from Boston on

is he all out screaming - or is he playing/babbling a little bit. if he's playing babbling a bit - i'd let him be. Also does he have any soft toys animals w/ him. my daughter has one of those pillow pets - a puppy - and when she goes to bed - it could be anywhere from 15 minutes to 1 hour - that she babbles away - talking to puppy ( she's 21 mos now) - and it's a soft pillow - so she's more likely to lay down on it and snuggle vs. getting up.

i know you necessarily don't want to play in the crib - but it works to give them something to do - i also have this fisher price toy that attaches to the side of the crib that plays music and projects a scene on the ceiling - that she knows how to turn on and off - so that keeps her laying down to watch the cieling...

but she's in her crib at 8PM each night - and some nights she's up till 9ish playing babbling but she's in her crib and working it out on her own - sometimes i may have to go in there for 5 minutes or so - but once she's in her room for the night she doesn't come back out. also in the morning - esp on the weekends - i hear her rustling around/playing around etc for an hour before she calls for us - which is nice b/c we can sleep in a bit too.

i never had the problem of teaching her to get back down - but sounds like a reasonable explaination as well.

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J.S.

answers from Springfield on

He's only a baby once. What's the rush to make him cry and be independent? He's still a very little guy.

In a few years you are really going to be regretting pushing him to grow up. Trust me. Take him out of his crib. Cuddle him. Rock him. This doesn't last forever.

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E.K.

answers from Boston on

Hey there K.-

My daughter (who will be 2 in August), did the same thing. I remember at nap time, I would stand outside the door and watch her. She would scream and scream and scream till she literally fell over asleep. We did the cry it out method and it worked great for us. I did it when she was about 2.5 months old and she slept through the night until this whole standing issue.. We did it again with her then.. She screamed for a week or so, but then learned how to lower herself down and starting sleeping through the night again and going down with no problem. She is now almost 2 and still is sleeping about 12 hours per night (now I just wish I could sleep like that :)

Good luck.. this will past too :)

E.

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L.Q.

answers from Boston on

Fell asleep standing that is so cute! I know your stress but CIO is really the only thing you can do at this point. If he falls asleep standing so be it. Just gently & quietly try and lay him down. He will stop sooner than later it is just new to him & he may have a little fear of "getting down".
When my son did that I just went in put him back down on his back without saying a word & walked out of his room. It took several times and hate to say but several days as well. But he finally learned how to get down on his own & learned mommy was not going to go into him & "pick him up, rub his back, talk to him, ect". any longer. They claim it is because they are scared to get down on their own & I agree. But with every new milestone with my son it seems he doesn't sleep well for a little while until it is not so "new" anymore.

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H.S.

answers from Boston on

My daughter did this too whenever she didn't want to nap. I even have a picture of her clinging to the railing and sleeping.
I would ignore it, firmly tell him that it is time to lie down and sleep. He will grow out of this phase once standing up isn't that special anymore.
Good luck!

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B.D.

answers from Boston on

Could it be that he doesn't know how to get himself back down or has bumped himself trying and is now pensive about trying again? My mom always told me that that can be an issue for the new "standers". My girls picked it up pretty quick once we helped them figure it out without hurting themselves. Good luck!

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D.S.

answers from Boston on

I think the sleep section of "The Babybook" by Sears and Sears may offer you some real practical advice and some theory on baby sleep (if you want it).

I think 1.5 h of "crying it out" is a loooong time. Phhhoooey. I am more of an attachment parenting mom, and i find it has paid off (but everyone always thinks their way pays off, of course). My 2.5 year old grows up to be pretty independent, courageous and self-relying. So i am doing similar parenting with my 4-months old daughter. That means: no crying out if it can be helped. So i'd look for a reason that he doesn't want to sleep/lie down (maybe he is not tired, maybe he is excited about being able to stand, maybe he does not know how to sit back down, maybe he needs more of mom and dad right now, ...). If it is not too hard to be flexible on this i would be flexible and coax him gently to sleeping only when he is ready. 1.5 h of protest does not sound like he was ready. Sleep can't be forced, is my experience.

good luck,
D.

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