URGENT Breast Feeding SOS

Updated on April 21, 2006
M. asks from Wylie, TX
28 answers

I'm in need of some
urgent advice. Yesterday morning my 8 1/2 mo old son started refusing to nurse. I
didn't think much of it at first, but then lunch, dinner and breakfast
again this morning, just arches his back screams and even bites me. He
is past the point of a bottle, so I've been giving him fresh pumped
breast milk mixed with frozen breast milk in a sippy cup.

I guess I'm most worried because he's only 8 1/2 month old and i know
he needs breast milk or formula until he's a year old. Pumping alone
is not going to keep my milk supply going for another 3 1/2 months.

I called the nurses at the hospital where he was born and they said
he was just trying to tell me he didn't want to nurse anymore and that
he only wants his sippy cup. They said once my milk supply is gone,
I'll have to give formula. They also suggested I start mixing formula
with my milk now so that he starts getting used to it and it's not a
big change all at once.

I'm a little freaked out and sad because I was definitely not ready to
give up breast feeding yet. Does anyone have any suggestions or ideas?
I'm calling his pediatrician on Monday, but thought I'd reach out to
you guys now.

Thank you soooo much for any advice you can give!

2 moms found this helpful

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Featured Answers

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L.S.

answers from Dallas on

I think you'd be better served to call a lactation consultant, rather than the pediatrician, as you are likely to be met by the pediatrician with the same attitude that the hospital gave you. I can't remember the names of any LCs, but they can't be hard to find.

Good luck!

More Answers

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L.

answers from Dallas on

I'm sorry I can't help with your specific situation but have you called the LaLeche league? They are the best about having EVERY possible option before stopping breastfeeding. I don't have their number but found them through our hospital or you can access their website. (But 8.5 mos is great by the way--most of the benefit from breastfeeding is in the first few mos so don't be too upset if its time to move on.) Good luck!

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C.

answers from Dallas on

i have not nursed in some time but i urge you to look at your diet just before the day your little one rejected the breast. I also think that you could call the la leche league and let them help you through. Try to stay with nursing exclusively as long as you can!!! You can do it, sister!!!

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J.S.

answers from Dallas on

Before you accept that your son is done breastfeeding, or needs formula, you can contact a local La Leche League leader for advice. Your son may be having a nursing strike, or he may be teething, and one of these caring women can help you get through it. The leaders are women who volunteer to get the training and help other moms, because breastfeeding is important to them. You don't have to be a member or even attend a meeting. You can just call for advice. Go to the website at WWW.LLLI.ORG and you can find a list of local leaders. It even lists their phone numbers on the site, so you can call different leaders until you reach someone.
Good for you for reaching out. Breastfeeding is so important, and there are many women who will support you through the rough times. Good luck!
Julia

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M.

answers from Dallas on

I have read sometimes babies refuse nursing during teething. My suggestion is to contact a lactation specialist before giving up on breastfeeding. I know of a good one named Linda Worzer. You can find her contact info at http://naturalbeginningsonline.com/contact.html

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A.

answers from Dallas on

Try calling La Leche League or a lactation consultant. He's probably on a nursing strike for some reason. Babies don't wean at this age.

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A.A.

answers from Dallas on

who did you talk to at the hospital...a nurse or a lactation consultant. The reason I wonder is I have never heard of a lactation consultant suggest formula in any amount. All I can say is don't give up. Never offer him a sippy cup without trying to nurse first. However if worse comes to worse, if you have a really good pump, you can produce enough milk for 3 1/2 months. Also, my doctors pediatricain had me put her on whole milk at 10 1/2 months, not 12. As long as they get plenty of other food and a vitamin it is okay.

K.M.

answers from Dallas on

M.,

I had so many nursing problems with my newborn and had to call a breastfeeding specialist. She absoulutely save us! She was so wonderful and knowledgeable she had our issues resolved with just a few instructions. She is pretty readily available too unlike some others. Her name is Wendy Blumberg ###-###-####. Give her a call....I know she can probably help you too.

Best of luck, and hang in there!

K.

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B.

answers from Dallas on

Hi, I just browsed this and saw your note. I hope that you got some answers. I nurse my 8 month old as well and understand your feelings of not being ready to give it up. Is he on solids? That would help. Also, is there any possibility you could be pregnant? I have heard that can change the milk and babies will often refuse it once this happens (pregnancy and change in hormones).

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K.

answers from Dallas on

I was trying to transition my 6 month old to more formula and he has been refusing to take more than 1.5 oz mixed with breast milk so I would definitely start introducing some type of formula now for when your milk supply does decrease, which it will likely do if he is refusing to nurse. I don't think you can force him to nurse if he doesn't want to, I think you just pump and try to give him expressed breast milk in the cup. You will still be giving him a breast milk/formula mixture which is better than formula alone, and you may be able to extend that until he is a year old. I wish you luck!

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C.

answers from Dallas on

Hi M.,

I initally had some trouble breastfeeding and ended up contacting Judy Eastburn. She is an International Board Certified Lactation Consultant. She was extremely helpful and got us on the right track. I felt more confident with her than with the "help" I received from the hospital where my little one was born. Her phone number is ###-###-####. I hope you find a resolution that works for you!

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A.M.

answers from Dallas on

Hi M., I'm a little late to respond but maybe I'll still be of help. My little one started tapering off some about the same time, my pediatrician told me to just stick with it. Very firmly tell him no if he bites, give him a few warnings and then remove him entirely, he'll take it if he is hungry. He would vary how long he nursed as he was taking in more solid foods so that was a change. I did not give him a sippy cup till he was 11mo so that he wouldn't have a choice of preference and even then it was only water, no juice or watered down juice. He became more active and eventualy just tapered off at a year old. I wasn't ready either. Maybe taking the cup away could help. I was surprised that mine was taking what seemed like so much less but the dr. also pointed out that he may just be more efficient at breastfeeding now and it doesn't take as long. Hope things get better, good luck!

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K.

answers from Dallas on

M.,

I'm so sorry this is happening. How frustrating and upsetting! I'm a little surprised the LC nurse told you that it for sure means he's weaning. I've had ups and downs with breast feeding, including a time when I thought I was losing my milk supply, and the ivillage lactation consultant board has helped me every time. Please, post your problem there! I know they'll have some help for you! http://messageboards.ivillage.com/iv-ppbreastfeed

I hope this helps.

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B.

answers from Dallas on

I know this is late but.....my lactation consultant is wonderful. Judy Eastburn ###-###-####

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A.L.

answers from Dallas on

Hi M.,

Take one day at a time. Your precious Luke may just be going through a short phase. The key is to not try and not create tension at the breast from the vibes you give. You want to let him go through his phase and keep that breastfeeding time as peaceful as possible. If he doesn't want to breastfeed, try an alternative. You may want to make sure he is not sick. He may be irritable for other reasons.

As for now, I would suggest giving breastmilk via the Medela SoftFeeder. You can get more information on the SoftFeeder by going on Medela's website at http://www.medela.com or directly to the SoftFeeder product information sheet at http://www.medela.com/NewFiles/pdfs/SoftFeeder_Ins.pdf

I am not a Medela rep! I am a pediatric dietitian and lactation specialist who simply believe in Medela products. :D

I hope this helps.

Blessings,
A.

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K.M.

answers from Dallas on

Sorry I only saw this email this morning! Arching and refusing to nurse can be signs of acid reflux and/or food allergies. It can also be a sign that your baby didn't like the flavor of something you ate. With the arching of the back, I think these are more likely reasons than just deciding he no longer wants to nurse. I needed a lactation consultant while nursing, and she told me babies sometimes take the same milk from bottles or cups, even if they won't take it from mom. They don't understand why this is. I would look at any changes you've made to your diet first before giving up!

If you don't feel your pediatrician is helpful, my pediatrician was very supportive of breastfeeding, and provided much valuable information to me. He's Dr. Straughn @ Forest Lane Pediatrics. His information is in MamaSource directory, and I've seen many other moms als recommend his group.

Also, my lactation consultant was Judy Eastburn in Richardson. She sees clients in her home @Hillcrest and Arapahoe, and she's intelligent and caring. Wonderful! Her number is ###-###-####. Good luck!

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K.K.

answers from Dallas on

Hi M.,
Hang in there...I have a friend whose child was premature so she has pumped every bottle of his and he is now 15 months old. You can do it if you want to...however to give some help and support check out www.pumpingmoms.org
My friend has used this support group throughout the time. I hope this helps and that you find peace in whatever happens.

K.

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M.S.

answers from Dallas on

so sorry you are going through this. I know it can be frustrating. Sometimes, babies can be having tummy trouble even with breast milk. He may not be getting enough and that can cause problems as well.....if you are thinking of mixing your breast milk and formula, may I suggest using prosobee brand. It is soy powder and will not hurt his little tummy......you might try two ounces of breast milk with two ounces of soy and see what he thinks. He may have to adjust to the taste as with any change. He definitely needs to have a bottle.....Most children arren't ready to switch to a sippy cup until they are a year old....now, that's not to say that he couldn't drink juice from a sippee cup and thn milk from a bottle....that actually would help him to identify between the two. When giving juice, make sure to dilute part water to part juice...then they don't get so much sugar...I hope this helps...God Bless you this day!

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C.M.

answers from Dallas on

That is exactly what my son did....but he did it much earlier. All I can say is maybe try to put him to the breast once a day...like at night and maybe he will nurse at night. Sometimes I think at this age they want to be up looking at things instead of on the breast...it's just him striving toward his independence. I totally understand that you are sad, but it's probably time for him. Just keep pumping your heart out to try to keep breast milk until he is a yr. old. And yes, I think it's a good idea to mix the formula with the breast milk. He also might be more hungry now and is just needing more to eat than breast milk. Anyway...hope this helps

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H.B.

answers from Dallas on

Sounds like a nursing strike to me. Keep offering the breast and he'll get back to it. I recommend the message boards at breastfeeding.com. Go on the main board and search for nursing striek for more advice.

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K.G.

answers from Boston on

I have been down this same road with both of my boys. He may be cutting teeth. Actually you can continue to pump and your milk supply will remain the same. My milk supply was always on the low side and there were several days which my son did not eat and I would just continue to pump, just make sure to stay on your pumping schedule. Good luck, please let me know if you have any more questions.
K.

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C.T.

answers from Dallas on

M.,

I think I agree with the nurses. It sounds like your little one is ready for his independence. If you have a good electric pump, you can continue to provide him with your milk. A pump in style by Medela should keep you stimulated enough to continue his supply. If not, formula and the solid food he eats, should be enough to sustain him.

When I weened my two children, it was a very emotional time. Just be patient and you will both adjust to your new relationship. Best of luck!

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M.

answers from Dallas on

Dont even worry about it...it is a blessing in disguise!! I swear! You'll know what I mean when you have #2! Anyway, my son did the same thing, and I pumped till I turned blue and mixed formula and then I started giving him soy milk, and he loved it. Don't even worry about the breast feeding, when they bite, thats when to stop. He will live, he will survive and he will still love you and think you are the best mom on earth!

_Maile

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D.W.

answers from Dallas on

Hi M.,
I am a Pedi RN and do mostly telephone triage.
What your little one is doing can very well be weaning himself. OR there may be something you ate that he dislikes. Keep trying to put him to breast first, if he continues to refuse, then ya- a sippy cup or bottle is the way to go.
I promise you he won't starve to death- he may initially refuse, but he WILL drink. At his age he need 24-32oz of formula/breast milk per day.
If you want to chat feel free to call me at ###-###-#### :-)
D.

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A.

answers from Dallas on

Hi M.! It sounds like your baby is going through a nursing strike. It's very common with babies his age. You definitely DON'T have to give up nursing. Here are a few tips on getting thru a nursing strike that helped me:
*Bath with your baby; skin to skin contact helps alot
*Try nursing him as he's just barely awake/asleep
*I did A LOT of walking around topless with my baby in my arms bouncing and singing, dancing, etc; just basically bonding with him and letting him know that the boob was there whenever he wanted it.
*You definitely DON'T want to force him to nurse, this may backfire on you. Just gently coax him and if he's not interested, act like you could care less if he nursed or not. Try not to get flustered or frustrated. I know, it's very hard!!!
*Make sure you keep up your pumping to keep up your supply, and drink plenty of water.
I think that's all I can think of at the moment. I would hightly recommend finding a local La Leche League chapter in your area and attending a meeting. They have been a wonderful source of support for me. Good luck!

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C.

answers from Dallas on

My 3 month old has never been able to nurse. He could never latch on, so I have been pumping since he was born and my milk supply is great. I had mastitis once and my supply began to go down. I called the lactation consultant and she suggested Mother's Milk herbal tea, fenugreek and blessed thistle herbal supplements. These worked fabulous and I now have a freezer nearly full of frozen breastmilk, and all I do is pump. I only had to use the tea and the fenugreek for about a week and I have enough milk for twins. I know this will not help with nursing, but it will give you the chance to continue giving him breastmilk.

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C.

answers from Dallas on

I was not fortunate enough to be able to breastfeed as long as you have, so I don't have any first-hand experience, but I've heard of babies having a "nursing strike". maybe that's what's going on? I think your pediatrician may have more helpful information than the hospital staff--I didn't much like their idea of just giving up on the situation. your child is at a good age to try a cup, I'm impressed with how you handled this situation!

I'd keep trying, myself. maybe the baby's not feeling well? another option aside from the pediatrician is a local la leche league. good luck!

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A.W.

answers from Dallas on

hi there, what your son could very easily be going through is what's known as a breastfeeding strike. my son did the same thing at the same age. it's very common around that age, yet it seems a lot of mainstream, formula happy docs either choose to or just plain don't know enough, and ignore it, or blow it off as just the baby wanting to wean. well honestly, i don't buy it. babies are NOT naturally ready to wean at such a young age.

my first suggestion is to contact a local la leche league, and they will be able to give you the most comprehensive advice. here are also some links: http://www.babycenter.com/refcap/baby/babybreastfeed/8490...

http://www.lalecheleague.org/FAQ/strike.html

http://www.lalecheleague.org/NB/NBstrikes.html

http://www.drjaygordon.com/development/bf/striketips.asp

i hope some of them really help you out. please try to perservere. you're right to be concerned and a great mama to take nursing seriously!!

keep on going, he'll latch back on pretty soon.

-A.

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