Trying to Get Almost 3 Year Olds to Share a Room

I have twins as well who are 9 and we have the same problem with them sharing a room -they always want to play at night. We have had them in their own rooms and they still get together. we tried having one sleep with older sister but they still get together and do their thing. I have decided to let them be and just put them to bed earlier. I find they do tend to stay up late one night but the next they will crash earlier from fatigue because they still have to get up at the same time each morning.

My twin boys (nearing 5 1/2) have always shared a room and, often, a bed...not because they had to but because they chose to. First, I'll tell you that I don't battle sleep very much. Unless their night behaviors seem to have a negative impact on their morning behavior, I don't fuss over it.

At three, my boys decided to sleep on the floor, in the hallway outside their bedroom door. I let them; we actually set up sleeping bags and pillows in that space for them. Six months later, they'd moved to sleeping on the floor in their room; again, this was fine, and the sleeping bag setup was moved there. The next transition was them sleeping in one of their beds together. That was the longest phase, having just stopped 7-8 months ago. And, yes, there came a point where their nighttime conversations and "reading" would keep them from getting a decent amount of sleep. What I did then was put a timer in their room. I would give them 15 minutes on the timer to "read" a few books after our bedtime routine; when the timer went off, it was time for lights out. Sometimes they'd lose toys or books for a couple days because they wouldn't follow the timer rules, but they are pretty good now about going to bed when it's time, and we stopped using the timer about a year ago. I think kids do better with settling down when they have a specific routine and have some warnings that bedtime is approaching, like a half hour and then 15 minutes, or 15 and then 10, etc.

Hope some of this helps a little, but mostly I just wanted to let you know I've been there and gotten through it successfully. You will figure out what works for your girls...promise.

I had this problem with my twin girls too. They just played rowdy at bedtime and took forever to fall asleep. I always separated them at nap time, otherwise they would never nap, but bedtime was a struggle for awhile. We used sticker charts, and they earned a sticker for having a good night. I also tried taking away privileges if I had to go in there too many times. Sometimes one or both would want to sleep somewhere other than their bed, like on the floor, or in the hallway, or guest room, and I just let them. Unfortunately, none of these things worked perfectly, but it got better on it's own over time. They are almost 4 now, and they also have a baby brother due very soon. They have a new room now, and bunk beds. One of them has chosen to sleep in the guest room for a few weeks now. Things seem to constantly change, but they do get easier as the girls get older. My best advice is to just hang in there and be as consistent as you can with the rules you set up. Don't be afraid to try different things if what you're doing is not working and wearing you out. Pick your battles carefully and try to be as relaxed as you can at bedtime. I think that helped me more than anything. Things just got worse when I became frustrated and short tempered, but changing my own reaction to the situation made a big difference. Remember they are only little once, so cherish them as much as you can, even when you feel like strangling them.

you might try putting them to bed half hour apart for a little while this way u get some stress releif and then they get a half hour everyother night with you. they will also start to notice that they slept together all night come morning good luck

you do not say much about a bedtime routine. try reading stories with them in bed, try soothing music something classical but some of that can be loud so be careful.
paula

Ok I my version of this problem is a very oppinionated single 5 year old, but I am a huge fan of Super Nanny and it seems like every family on the show has a bedtime issue and her solution is virtualy the same for every single one. Lay down the law as to when and what is expected at bedtime then follow through. Don't let them play for an hour if it is bedtime. Give them one warning, then if they continue plunk them into their beds with a kiss goodnight. If they get up again go back and plunk them back in their beds without a word from you. Rinse and repeat until they get it that just because they share a room now does NOT mean that it is always play time. This may take a few nights but with a good routine after a while the worst you might get is a couple of nights where they share a bed, or stay up whispering. Just be glad they aren't fighting with eachother.

I'd start by sitting in the doorway with your back to them until they fall asleep. Read a book or something. That way it can't get too out of hand. You just snap at them to get back in bed or be quiet.

Another option I used is a marble jar. I'd give 3 marbles into the jar at bedtime. Each time out of bed or being loud, I'd take a marble. The first one was a freebie. The second marble being taken away meant that child had to go to bed 15-30 minutes early the next night. If all three got taken away, there was a more serious consequence... loss of a favorite toy, loss of privileges for the next day, loss of nightlight, bedroom door shut, etc. If she kept all three, then she'd get an extra privilege the next day, or something. We eventually got to a star chart where she'd get a star for every night she kept all three and after 5 stars she got to pick something at the Dollar Store. I'd keep a baby monitor in their room though because you will probably notice that the one getting in the most trouble is not the instigator. Usually, one will try to get the other to disobey and parents will only catch the one that fell into the trap.

Could you, for the time being, let one share with the baby? We have a 3 year old and a 10 week old, they share a room just fine. I put the 3 year old to bed, nurse the baby in another room, then put her to bed (he his fast asleep by that point). Both are in bed by 8:00...The baby only wakes up once at night, around 3:00 - I get her before she cries (good ears I guess - they are upstairs from us), so the older doesn't wake up - she eats in another room, goes right back in...he doesnt even know...Don't know how either of your older kids would respond, but this combination works for us. Good luck

I had to do this with a three year old boy and a four year old boy. The only way that I could make it work was to put one to bed half an hour earlier than the other and sing him to sleep. Good luck.

Did the girls share a room before the transition to big girl beds? If not, this is all new to them so it's going to take longer. You put them down, and read them a book, tuck them in and say 'Good Night!', lights out. Give them 30 minutes of talk time, this is their bonding, venting about the day, quiet time. You can even tell them that they have a little bit of time for themselves, but they have to stay in their beds and use indoor voices, then it's quiet time. You'll be in to check.

You can also use the consequences of good behavior. Create a chart with their names and dates on it. Let them know that the first one to fall asleep gets a gold star/sticker on their chart. And the first one to get 10 stars gets 'a special treat', you decide it could be a one on one trip with a parent to the grocery store, a new book, whatever...
if they're both asleep when yo come in to check, they each get two stars. Keep this going for at least two months. You'll need the routine to keep going when the new baby brother arrives.

Congrats on your impending arrival!! You have two great little helpers who will be anxious to help in every way. I strongly, and I do mean strongly suggest that you get them each a baby doll to care for, one that they can feed, dress, diaper, rock and be Mommy to, so they leave the care and feeding of the new brother to you. I did this for my daughter with each of her brothers and for my oldest son when our youngest arrived. It helps so much!!!