Trouble with the Bus

My daughter went through this in kindergarten also. She was fine the first few days of school but then did not want to get on the bus. Fortunately, we had a great bus driver. Unfortunately, she had to literally peel a bawling 5-year-old off me and physically place her on the bus. But then she gave her a seat right behind her, and as someone else suggested, the bus driver gave her little jobs to do. Within a couple of days, no more problems getting her on the bus. She is almost 13 now and does not even remember the whole thing! I told her that's not fair, because I do, and it was torture watching her get on that bus kicking and screaming!

On another note, however, I would make certain there is nothing else going on. In her later elementary years, she started telling me some of the things that went on in the bus and at the bus stop. She was never in danger, but out of respect for her level of discomfort with the conversation and activity going on, I started driving her to school. It ended up being a really great thing having conversations during those transition times to and from school. I noticed she opened up more about her day when I picked her up than when she rode the bus.

Sorry your idea to ride with her has sort of backfired on you. That was a very loving thing to do for her. My friend's daughter had a lot of anxiety with the bus. After a lot of effort of trying to get her on it and then ending up driving her anyway, my friend just completely gave up the struggle and accepted that she would drive her daughter to school everyday (4 mins. away). She found that avoiding a meltdown was easier for everyone. The daughter's in 9th grade now and is terrific. She hasn't had bus problems since 4th or 5th grade maybe?

Anyway, I don't think that will happen to you, but I would give her a choice...ride on the bus with her friend or you'll drive her to school. If she picks being driven to school, I bet it would only last for a couple of days. Keep your drive boring. Maybe you could even drive behind the bus (all those stops-ugh!) and subtly remind her that she could be sitting with her friend having fun. Or maybe give her something (a new Polly Pockets or a cookie) to just show or share with her friend on the bus so she has an incentive to go and something to look forward to. Or give her a reward for taking the bus--depending on how you look at it, it could be bribery or a reward. Or maybe the bus driver could give her a little job that she really needs help with...her job could be to tell the bus driver when all the kids have sat down or when they're all on the bus so the door can be closed.

Just a bunch of little ideas you could try. I'm sure it'll work out eventually. Good luck!

It is time for some tough love.. walk to the bus.. take her to her seat and then depart the bus. Sometime in the future you will need to take the next step of not walking her on the bus. Yeah she will proably cry and throw a fit but ignore it, let her know you will be there for her to get on and off but you will no longer tolerate her behavior

Have the bus driver tell your daughter that the rules are that only children and the driver are allowed on the bus from now on. Moms and Dads are not allowed because it's against the rules. Little kids are usually good at following rules so she'll probably be ok with it.

I also have kids this age and they are very sensitive. What if you told her you would only ride for 3 more days or until the end of the week? If she knew that was it, would that help her?

Or perhaps you could sit behind the driver, and she could sit in her assigned seat. You let her get on first, without talking or guiding her and just be there for moral support.

What can the school suggest? Can you talk to the school counselor or her teacher? Maybe they would be able to help.