There He Goes Again

Updated on April 10, 2013
F.B. asks from Kew Gardens, NY
17 answers

Mamas & Papas-

So our boy is now 2.5, and he's worked out how to use the toilet. After months of showing interest in our bathroom habits, watching kids in the open bathroom/ changing room of the daycare, and some attempts at the potty, he's decided that peeing while standing is awesome. He pulls a stool up to the toilet, pulls down his pants, takes off his diaper, and has a wee, and a giant grin.

He's done this 4x at our house, and once at grandma's yesterday.

Daycare asked us to put him in pull ups and will be taking him every hour or so. They will use down the remaining diapers during naps.

Any tips on what we can do to keep up the momentum? He's not interested in candy or treats. Also, while I would be alright with underpants and accidents, daycare and grandma want him in diapers/ pull ups until he's consistently using the toilet and dry.

Thanks,
F. B.

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So What Happened?

Thanks for all the feedback and the support. No wriggle room, unfortunately re: the pullups at grandmas and at daycare. Grandma and daycare both are happy to take him to the toilet, and to encourage toileting, but neither is willing/ able to address the clean up in the early learning stages. I'll use training pants with a plastic bloomer at home, and take him frequently. We'll also use stickers or maybe draw smiley faces on his hand by way of praise/ encouragement.

Keep the ideas coming. Always open to suggestions.
F. B.

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C.N.

answers from Baton Rouge on

Pullps are nothing but glorified diapers. I never used them with my daughter either. We went from cloth diapers to cloth training pants to panties. Daycare and Grandma should know that he will train faster in real underwear than in Pullups.

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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

Praise. Simple praise can go far. And promise him a trip to the store for big boy underpants when he's dry all day for a week or something.

4 moms found this helpful

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C..

answers from Columbia on

pull ups are the spawn of Satan. They are completely counterproductive to everything you are trying to accomplish in regards to potty training.
I understand Grandma wanting you to use them.... but not daycare. :-(

In my experience the momentum is you keeping reminding him and heaping on the praise and/or helping him clean himself up. Pull ups eliminate the natural consequence option. So, hopefully the praise will be what it takes. However, once he's home.... NO pullups. Undies or commando.

Good luck.

8 moms found this helpful
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S.B.

answers from Redding on

My kids never even knew what a Pull-Up was. They went straight from diapers to underwear. I had the thick training pants, but I also let them pick underpants at the store. My son didn't want to pee on Spiderman, my daughter didn't want to pee on Barbie. Those were great incentives.

It just seems odd to me to get a kid SOOOOOOOO excited and proud of himself for using the potty and then putting another diaper or pull-up on him.
I understand daycare doesn't want to deal with wet clothes or underwear, send a plastic bag for the wet clothes and have a back up pair.

Grandma watched my kids and she was totally on board with my training methods. You take them to the bathroom often and let them try whether they actually go or not. Then they wash their hands and it's off to something else. Then, about 20 minutes later, back to the bathroom.

As far as momentum, I would take the diaper or the pull-up off of him the minute you get him home and both of you make a trip to the bathroom. Mommy has to go then let him have a try. Let Daddy take turns with him too.

My dad had a "pee" rock outside. My son thought he was really big stuff getting to go out to the pee rock with grandpa. Two men out in the wild of grandpa's acreage with the horses and the goats and the chickens...
Peeing on a rock.

There was a method to my dad's madness. Him peeing on the rock gave my son the urge to pee too (much like the sound of a trinkling faucet). Also, he taught him how to aim and not be spraying all over.
My dad made stools for both of my children so they could get up and down from the potty on their own safely. My daughter sat, but my son had great practice at standing and aiming.

You're doing a great job! Your son is well on his way!!
For now, I guess you have to do what daycare and grandma want.
Check him the minute you pick him up from daycare. If he's dry, take that diaper or pull-up off and throw it in the trash. Take him to the potty and put underpants on him before you leave.
Do the same thing at grandma's. Let your son know you trust that he doesn't need a diaper anymore.

There will be accidents. The truth is that there isn't a kid around who is fully potty trained and hasn't gotten busy playing and didn't want to stop what they were doing to go to the bathroom. 99% of the time (not scientific numbers, by the way) they will say they thought they could hold it longer.
It ends up in an accident. I don't think that means a 5 or 6 or even 7 year old should be put back in diapers over it.

Keep up the good work and this is just my opinion.

4 moms found this helpful
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J.C.

answers from New York on

Sounds like the momentum is going just fine. Use the pull ups when in day care or at grandmas. At home - undies only. And get him some with batman or spider man or whatever his favorite is.

2 moms found this helpful

J.B.

answers from Houston on

That is awesome! Never really understood the pull-ups?!?!? If he is this far along I would try real hard to get grandma on board with it.
I can somewhat understand the position of the daycare, but grandma needs to earn her keep ;)
Good luck.

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L.M.

answers from Reno on

I made a sticker chart for my little man. Every time he used the potty, he got to put a sticker on the chart. Once a full line was stickered, he'd get to go to the store and pick out a coloring book, story book, puzzles, crayons, etc.... (one thing for each line). He started to be so successful, I decided to take him to the dollar store instead of Target lol... he loved putting the stickers on the chart and there was no worries regarding sweets, sugar and such.

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S.B.

answers from Houston on

Yay that your little man is wanting to pee pee in the potty!! Now I have the pee pee in the potty song in my mind from "Look Who's Talking"!

I refused to use pull ups. Defeats the purpose of potty training. I bought several packages of training underwear. They are really thick but the child still feels the mess. I wanted my kids to feel wet and uncomfortable. I only used one package! Yay! When I trained my guy, I would put cheerios in the potty so he could work on his "aim". =)

For both kids I used underwear as an incentive. For my daughter, I bought the fufu panties and princess panties. Told her she couldn't wear them until she was a big girl and going pee pee and poo poo in the big girl potty. Took a couple of days and she was trained. For my son, I bought super hero undies and told him the same thing about being a big boy and using the potty. Plus, he got to "aim" at the cheerios. About a week for him as well. Plus, we praised them and told them how smart and wonderful they were to go potty in the big girl/boy potty. Lots of hugs and kisses. Plus fancy underwear! =)

Good luck!!!

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R.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

Yay!!

Don't get pullups, use cloth trainers (with covers at daycare) so he can feel the mess, that will keep up the momentum better. Your son, your choice :)

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M.C.

answers from Washington DC on

There are some pullups that let them feel wet, with out the mess. What I used to do, especially when going out on errands was to put my kid in regular underwear, and then a pullup. That way, they were dry if they messed in the car, and still felt the wet if they did mess.

For some daycares, it's a sanitation issue. The workers don't want to have to clean up after each kid. Some daycares don't mind the cleanup.

I agree that if you can get away with using real undies do it. Maybe only use a pullup during nap and bedtime? As soon as they are awake, the pullups come off.

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K.M.

answers from Kansas City on

I also agree with the comments on pull-ups. We've never used them.

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P.G.

answers from Dallas on

We started training at 3 when my son went to daycare. They did pullups for a short time for him to practice pulling pants up/down. After a few weeks, we switched to underwear and pullups were for night time. There will be some accidents, but it wasn't too bad.

1 mom found this helpful
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B..

answers from Dallas on

Yep, prize for dry all week. My youngest trained in 3 weeks! To even dry at night!

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H.W.

answers from Portland on

Everything CoMoMom said. When I had potty training kids in my group, I actually requested that the parents send their child either in underwear or actual diapers. Pull-ups are like 'magic' underwear-- they look like undies but don't allow kids to feel wet. My experience as a nanny (some families insisted on pull-ups) is that they can become a power struggle to get them into real undies AND nearly always prolong the process.

And longtime caregivers KNOW that poopy pull-ups are a mess (you have to tear the sides and get them on the changing table, just like a diaper, no?). Most of us can do a 'standing up diaper change' more easily than having the child in pretend underwear which requires changing all the clothes to put on/take off, etc.

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P.K.

answers from New York on

Does not sound like he needs rewards. He seems to be doing fine. Who is the fool that ever invented pull ups. They serve no purpose, but to confuse child. It's a shame grandma won't allow u drew ear. To me it is the only way to go. Not training pants, just reg underwear. Hopefully he will u deist and home is underwear only. Grandma and daycare pull ups. Good luck.

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A.P.

answers from New York on

My 1st & 3rd were trained right before 2 on their own & without rewards just as easily as your guy. I'd say, when you're home, use underpants, and let daycare continue as they are. After a few weeks without accidents, they'll start using underpants. One thing we did was make the big--kid underwear shopping trip a big deal. They were so excited to pick out their favorite characters and use them.

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L.H.

answers from New York on

Sounds like you're already doing the right thing F. B.. You might want to limit how many pull-ups you buy. My boy zoomed right past the pull-ups and had regular undies he picked out himself. A lot of times regular undies are enough of an incentive, because they don't want to get their favorite characters dirty. You might also want to explain to your boy what it feels like when you have a "poopoo belly." That way he'll know when to sit on the potty for a BM. You can even just get the plastic/rubber mattress cover and let him wear regular undies in bed as well. My boy stayed dry the entire time once he was put in regular undies. Buzz Lightyear undies look out...here comes little F. B.. :)

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