Sympathy Gift

Updated on March 03, 2008
C.J. asks from Fort Worth, TX
13 answers

One of the partners at my husbands work just lost his father. We know that he probably would not want us send flowers. They did not set up any charity for donations so does anyone have a suggestion on what I can send to his family?

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J.A.

answers from Dallas on

Hello C.,

My mom and I started giving friends a rosebush to plant in memory of their loved one.When they see lovley blooms everyday it will bring a smile to their face and a good memory of their loved one everyday. Also some places you can order a spiral ham or something like that and have it sent to the family. Even a simlpe card letting them know you are thinking of them is nice. Hope this helps.
J. A.

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C.W.

answers from Dallas on

I would talk to the family and see if they belong to a church or maybe the Father belonged to a church or was a Boy Scout or a part of an organization. Maybe talk to the Son about the Father and find out any activities or organizations he was in and that might be an idea to donate to that organization/group, if it was a big part of his life. If you can find that out, then you could send a donation that way. My Dad passed away last year and that's what my Mom did was requested no flowers and said to send money to her church for a children's playground or the public library.

Meals are nice and the family will really appreciate that too. Most people bring casseroles and bigger dishes for lunch/dinner. I would bring maybe donuts or some breakfast food-sausage/egg dish or some other dish like that. Croissants and jelly would be great or Krispy Kreme donuts,etc... Another thing is potted plants, those are nice rather than flower arrangements that die.

A lot of times in the obituary, you might try and get the name and look at the obituary; the family will make requests there. If you know where the visitation and funeral is, you could also call the funeral home and ask them.

Another idea is for several people at your work to go in together and get a bigger gift-platter or more meals or a bigger plant.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.H.

answers from Dallas on

other than flowers taking food is always a good thing, bc you usually do not want to have to cook in times like that. other than that i am not sure what you would do.

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S.H.

answers from Dallas on

I love Catherine's idea of making a donation in his honor. That is a fantastic idea and something that can help someone else that is in need, as well. I agree in finding out what charities or causes meant something to his father.

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L.H.

answers from Abilene on

A gift my husband received upon his mother's death was a tree to plant in our yard in her honor. It was very touching and the tree reminds us of her in all seasons. Another idea is to make a donation to a public library, church library where they attend, or to the Red Cross. Most of the time those places will send a card notifying them of the memorial made.

Hope this helps!
L.

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S.S.

answers from Dallas on

Food is always helpful. Most people send either desserts or dinner meals. So, maybe a nice breakfast casserole or something instead of a dinner. When my grandfather passed, we had so much food sent to us though that we then asked anyone who wanted to "help" to donate money to the church he and my grandmother attended and volunteered at. It was something that was near and dear to both of them and something we knew they both would have liked. Or a plant or tree that can be replanted would be nice too.

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T.L.

answers from Dallas on

an edible fruit basket. my dad passed away 2 years ago and we had so many plants that it was rediculous. you know you have people over alot during that time and that is something that everyone can enjoy. i would have liked that if someone had sent that. i am only 33 so i think that would be nice for any age and if not that then get a unigue plant that they would pick out and keep.

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A.L.

answers from Tyler on

Hi, I lost my brother a year ago and a lot of people brought my family and I food. We appreciated it so much. We didnt have to worry about going to the store and fixing dinner. Our minds were in other places so it was very helpful. Also just a card to say you are there for them means so much too!

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S.S.

answers from Wichita Falls on

A card saying we're so sorry for your loss. I usually attach it to food - coffee cake for example - and hand deliver it.

S.

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M.C.

answers from Wichita Falls on

I think a nice card with prayer cards enclosed. Go online and find a sympathy prayer or two.....print on regular paper and enclose in the card. That is what I do. It comes from my heart and I think people like it.

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T.T.

answers from Dallas on

When my husband and I lost our twin boys, we got a few plants. I don't have a green thumb, but fortunately I still have the plants and I think of the boys and the people who gave them to me everytime I water them! It's a nice thought.

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C.W.

answers from Dallas on

My husband and I are business owners, and we typically will do a charity donation on behalf of the deceased. It means a lot more than flowers that just get thrown away, and the families really appreciate it. I've done American Red Cross, American Cancer Society, and Susan G. Koelman to name a few, and you can do it online and they'll send a card for you. But anywhere you do it will be a blessing!

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J.P.

answers from Wichita Falls on

When my father in law passed away, we were sent a cookie bouquet. It was soooo thoughtful because we have 4 kids. They loved it and it was so good! Brought a little joy during such a sad time.

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