Signs of Premature Labor and Now Bedrest- Help!

Dear A.,
You have already gotten a lot of good advice/encouragement. Let me add a couple things....a LOT of women begin to efface & dialate early in the pregnancy and it does NOT lead to premature labor. Yours may not. I would definately follow your care provider's advice and also put in a call to sidelines
www.sidelines.org They offer bedrest support and will match you with someone who has been through your same situation as a mentor. They will send you a package of materials to get your through your bedrest and it is all for free. A wonderful service. Get help, and accept every bit of help that is offered!
Blessings to you & your family!
D. Easthon CD(DONA), LCCE, ELCS
www.heart2heartbirthmatters.com

I have been where you are 3 times! My first one I went on bed rest at 35 weeks and she came exactly one month early. The second one, I went at 32 weeks and she came at 38 weeks, and my 3rd one I went on bed rest at 26 weeks and he came 4 weeks early. They all ended up healthy. It can be scary because they are worried about lung function. Only the first one had to stay an extra day or two in the hospital for jaudice, which is common in all babies. They are now 7, 9, & 10, all healthy. Just try to relax. I think the hardest part was trying to explain to the other kids I had why I couldn't pick up an hold them. They never knew why I went with premature labor. It is worth every moment of bed rest when they come! Best of luck!

A.,
So sorry for the news of your bedrest. I was on bedrest with my first child for 4 weeks and later volunteered for a local agency that helped support bedresting mothers. I know it can be hard. I remember crying when my husband told me he was going to go and get gas in the car.....silly I know, but i just thought he was so lucky to be able to leave the house. Just keep reassuring yourself...you CAN do this, for you and for your baby boy. It's not always easy to stay positive. Try to keep a supply of good books and magazines around you, and maybe a supply of good movies. See if friends/family can come to visit/bring you lunch and help out with your 16 month old. You will definitely need to extra help with your 16 month old because it will be hard for him at first to understand why mommy can't do all the things that she always does. I had premature labor with my third child also. I know how it makes you feel so helpless. I think I just finally resigned myself to live my life in faith and not in fear. I have 3 amazing and healthy children that I thank God for every day. Just listen to your docs, do what your intuition tells you and LET OTHERS WAIT ON YOU! I know that is super hard for us,as mothers, to do. But do it! Keep us posted on your new addition. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Please feel free to contact me if you just need to chat. Sometimes it's nice to talk to someone who has been through it!

I went into premature labor several times and was in the triage 3 times before begging them to induce me at 37 weeks one day. They kept saying I was dehydrated so my advice to you keep very hydrated and well nourished throughout the day. I was never told to do bed rest I think I started preterm at about 34 weeks. I also never dialated except 1 cm. Any way, take it easy not sure if the bedrest would be necessary but I am not a DR. I bet fluids and food would ease some of this at least that is what helped me. Good luck I am sure all will be fine.

I had a similar experience which was pretty scary, but all turned out well! I had just turned 31 weeks and started to bleed...very scary. I was dialated and effaced a little and they treated me for preterm labor. I spent 2 days in the hospital, stressful enough but I also had to be away (for the first time!) from my 20 month old son. I was sent home after everything was stable and put on bed rest also.
My husband was able to take vacation time from work since it was an emergency and help me with our son while I was on bed rest. We had to fill out papers for the Family Medical Leave Act (which maybe you can do) so my husband was sure to keep his job. I also had help from my mom and mom-in-law for a couple weekends. Once I was past about 36 weeks, my midwife told me to not worry so much about bed rest anymore because the baby was big and health enough to be born. My daughter took her time! and I had to be induced at 40 weeks!
I wish you all the best and that your little one takes his or her time to come into this world. Another thing that may help...when I was in the hospital, the doc told me that 32 weeks is the important time for babies. At 32 weeks they are developed enough to be born and be healthy since we have such good medical technology now. You're at 33 weeks so that's good! so rest, take it easy, and know that all will be fine.

The same thing happened to me with my fifth pregnancy. My son was 11 months old and a high need child. We are military, away from all friends and family so we had to put him in part time daycare just for that two months and when he was home we bought 2 of those play yards made up of what looks like 6 baby gates that all fit together. We attatched them all together and made one giant corale that we put in the living room. We set it up so that it fit aound either side of the sofa and we were in the corale together. I had a laundry basket with his food, diapers, wipes, bottles of water, formula, changes of clothes and anything else I thought I might need for him. We just hung out inside that corale, that way he had everything he needed including toys and could move around while I laid on the sofa. It was my husband's idea and I thought it was crazy, but it actually worked pretty well.

I carried to term and all was well. I will pray the same for you. God bless you.

L.

First of all... GOD bless you for being down with a little one at home. That feels impossible. I recently was on restricted activity with my last pregnancy ( I too had a 2 year old demanding my attention). The days seem to last forever!

The best thing for you to do is take care of yourself. Whenever possible get help from your Mom, Mother-in-law, friends, obviously hubby. You can't be the active mommy right now because you are busy growing your youngest son. Let your family burn off some energy with the little one. Don't let the guilts set in. It did with me BIG TIME. If you can, find activities that allow you to be still and play with your son (reading, coloring, movies, etc.)

As far as the preterm labor thing goes.... you are 33 weeks. That is getting to the point where he is almost term. My oldest son was delivered emergency c-section at 37 weeks. He did GREAT... after he was born. My sister is currently 28 weeks pregnant with twins and having contractions. Her OB told her that if she could make it to 30 weeks, the babies would be fine. You've already made it to 33!!! Hang in there as long as you can. If that little guy comes early... he comes early. He's past the window of viability. Now his lungs are just developing. If he should come within the next 3 weeks, there is medications they can give to speed up surfactant development in the lungs.

Keep your chin (and feet) up! Hang in there... it's almost over! This late pregnancy stage stinks. But remember your reward is coming!! Best wishes and CONGRATULATIONS!!

Hello'
My name is D.. I have 2 children whom are 25 and 22 now, but when I was pregnant with my first child, I had to stay in bed for 6 weeks because I had toximia. With my second chld, I was dialiting early also. I was due in late December and I started dialate in early Novemver. They were looking for me to go into early labor. They told me to take it easy and start bedrest, but at that time of year, it is not an easy task. I ended up having her in early January, after my due date. I know that we are talking about over 20 years ago and a lot of things change, but they still thought that i would deliver early and ended up going late. So even though they know 'all', some times they are not right. You might just dialate enough that it is not bad, so don't worry yet. Just pray about it and let God handle the rest. He will you know. He is in charge.

Hi A.,

I hope you have family or friends that can help you! I went through the same thing, except my daughter (child #1) was almost 3 at the time. We were blessed to have parents and in-laws that would take turn staying with us for a week at a time and they would do all the cooking, cleaning and help take care of my daughter.

My first child was born at 31 weeks...that was 23 years ago!
With my second child, my doctor was monitoring me very closely
because of my history. I went into labor at 31 weeks and stayed in the hospital for 12 days. My doctor said she would let me go home on bed rest if I had help. Like I mentioned previously, my parents and in-laws took turns coming and staying the week with us so I could stay in bed. We put our bed right in the middle of the living room floor so I could see what was going on and not feel secluded! My oldest would climb up in bed with me and we read alot of stories! I was on bed rest about a month before our 2nd child was born.
She is now 20 and we are blessed to have 2 beautiful, healthy girls who are now college students!

May God bless you with friends and family to help you!

C.

Hello A. I have been in your shoes at one time. I was 30 and at least our daughter was a lot older. We had our daughter and when she was five We tried to get pregnant but misscarried two times. We kept trying and I did get preg. again and had 17 shots to help me carry the baby and then bedrest. Pay attention to your Dr. and all should be ok. Ask family or friends to come in and help. I am sure someone around you would be glad to give you helping hand. If I were closer to you I would be happy to help out :-)Best of luck. God Bless you and yes pray a lot Prayer works. K.

My nephew's wife went into labor 4 weeks before her due date. The baby weighed 7lb 10oz when he was born that day. Everything is fine and he is very healthy. My advise is to work with your Dr. and wait to see what happens. I am sure he would like to see you go full term, but it don't sound to me like if you go sometime soon, that it will hurt anything except your schedule. Keep a bag packed and don't worry as long as your Dr says things are fine.

I went into pre-term labor at 22 weeks with my pregnancy. I was put on FULL bed rest from that point on until I had my two beautiful girls. To keep things in perseptive I kept telling myself that the children inside me had no chance unless I did what the doctor ordered. I was in bed for 10 weeks. I found books to read, movies to watch, coupons to cut out and lists to make for all my family and friends who were helping out. My husband loved the grocery list because he knew what I was craving. It was not easy. I am very independant but I think God was making me understand I can't do it on my own.

A.,
I have been there so I understand the struggles. My daughter was at 13 almost 14 months when the preterm labor got to the point of putting me on partial bed rest. I have a couple of questions that would make it easier to make suggestions, first did they give you the steroid shot to help speed up lung development? Second, do you have any help at home during the day? I had gotten the shot, but had no help during the day so although I tried to stay down it was tough. My best suggestions would be to find a room that is completely safe for your son and put up a gate, then you can stay down for the most part. It helps to prepare a cooler with sippies and snacks in it so you are not getting up constantly. My son was born at 32 weeks and is fine now, people don't know he was a premie unless I tell them. I hope this helps and if you want to talk I am here. You will be in my prayers and please let us know how everything turns out.
Sincerely,
A.

I went into preterm labor at 28 weeks with my second one and dialated to 2 cent. I, thankfully didn't have to be on bedrest as medication had to be used to stop the contractions. I had a 2 years old at home also. One thing I can suggest is make it a good quiet time together. Grab a stack of books and lay in the bed and read to your child. Have your little boy point things out to you and vise versa. This gives you a rest! Hang in there! This to shall pass and you will get the prize in the end!

I was 32 weeks when I went to my check up (first pregnancy). I told the doc that I was having what I guessed were a lot of Braxton Hicks (sp?) contractions. I said "Well, there goes one now." She felt my belly and decided to hook me up to a monitor. I was having regular contractions. I was sent to the hospital from their office. I was there for several hours until they got them stopped. I was teaching at the time. I had to take a week off and be on bed rest. After that, I was allowed to go back to half days of teaching as long as the rest of my day was spent in bed and I promised to use the elevator at school. It turns out, my son was 2 weeks late!! I used all of the bed rest time to read the Harry Potter books (there were only 3 at the time) and now my son is the biggest Harry Potter fan I know. Hang in there and just relax!!!

I really don't have advise, but I can offer encouragement. While pregnant with my oldest I developed toxemia (eclampcia) and was induced at 32 1/2weeks. I was in the hospital for the next 4 days to make sure my bp was down and my daughter although small was a picture of perfect health. We had a small apniea incident while in NICU, but that was quickly resolved. She came home on her 3wk birthday from the NICU. She is without a doubt the healthiest, happiest, and brightest 4yo a mother could ever hope for. So if you do end up delivering early, there is a very very strong chance of your baby being in perfect health. Chin up and take it easy for a while momma. You and baby are going to be fine I'm sure. I will say a little prayer for you and baby also.

A.,

The hardest part will be wrangling that little boy while you keep yourself calm and quiet.
Definitely call in any favors of babysitting you can, but if you cant, this may help: have your husband unroll a sleeping bag or pillows and covers out in the family room so the both of you can camp out and lie down. Throw the TV rules out the window and try and distract him with his favorite shows. Maybe even have hubby make a fort for him while you lie on your 'sleeping bag' on the couch. Have all his toys at arms reach (HIS arms reach, not yours) and just play and read to him as much as you can. Who knows, he may even lay down for his nap right inside his tent.

Very good luck to you and your family. I wish you only the best.
J.

You really need help. If a family member such as mom or mother in law cannot come try teenager, also the elderly may want to help. With families spread out so far anymore it would be like an extra granny or pawpaw. You'll be there so it's not like they could ruin your house. Check with friends who have teens, check with churches, and schools they may be able to help. The only thing they are going to want to be paid. Even if it's a couple hours a day. With the elderly they since they probably are living on a fixed income would welcome any extra cash and might do it for less than a teen. It would not be too srtessful for them.
I am 52 and in poor health but I watch the youngest grandson who is two. He's sweet as pie and no trouble at all for me. They pay the cable bill since he loves his programs. And we are helping them from paying high prices at tradtional daycares. Also he's only here 4 days a week. The other granny who works full time wants one on one time with him too.
Good luck.

I was on bedrest for 4 months. I was terrible. I had to ask and accept help from everyone. Try to get your husband, friends, neighbors, and family to take turns coming over and spending time with you and your child. You need to be laying down and not moving as much as possible. You should only be getting up to go to the restroom and kitchen to eat.

Thus, running after your toddler, making dinner, house cleaning and shopping are not options. Explain this to others and make a schedule when people can come over to help you out. You can let dishes, laundry, and house cleaning go a bit and have only the bare minimum done. You can usually hire a cleaning service to come over for about $50 a week to do a basic clean. Try to have people bring over dinners or buy frozen dinners and casseroles that can be put in the oven.

If you cannot find people to help, your doctor can prescribe a hospice service to come to the house once a day or several times a week. Additionally, DayBreak is a service that provides temporary housing for children of parents who need a break for whatever reason, mental, physical, ailments, etc. When I was on bedrest in the hospital, I registered for this service. It's sort of like a temporary foster family that is available for you anytime.

You may also consider contacting your church or any church for help since you are on bedrest and cannot take care of yourself or your son right now. This is temporary, so do not feel bad about asking for help. This is for the health of your child and yourself.

Maybe you can watch alot of disney movies w/ your son or have him on the bed w/ you to read books. Take it easy! See if any family could come and help at some point during the day.

As one who has had a premature baby I have two things to say... First you will get through the bed rest (I had to with a 1 year old running around. It's hard, but you have to so your best. Don't worry about slighting your presnt child... it is such a short period of time, really, and your next child's health depends on it. (Just keep reminding yourself what a short time this really is!) Also, you're already 33 weeks, so that's a great thing. By 34 weeks, you are out of the serious danger zone, although I realize that no one wants their baby to come that early and it could still be difficult. They can do so much for early babies these days. I went in to labor at 27 weeks and my son was born at 30weeks and has suffered no ill effects. He did require a ventilator for the first hours and had to have a blood transfusion (due to severe anemia), but other than that he did well as he stayed in the NICU for his first 5 weeks. I hope for the best for you and both your babies!

Do whatever you can to get some help (while on bed rest) family, friend, neighbor, church... even if to call or come check on you 2-3 times a day. If you have family or friends with teenagers, hire them for babysitting your little one, so that you can rest as much as possible.
Have someone go to the library for kids movies, the dollar store for age appropriate things to try to keep little one entertained.

Hi A.,
I started effacing at 28 weeks and was put on bedrest. Our little one also tried to come at 30 weeks and at 32 weeks. I'm not really sure what her big hurry was, but it must she must have gotten over it, because she actually came at almost 37 weeks! Although I knew I HAD to do it for my baby, it was very frustrating for me and I didn't have another child to watch over. I know that some Doula's offer help with siblings while mom is on bedrest and postpartum. You may even consider hiring a babysitter to come help out so you can get rest. My doctor also took me off many restrictions at 34 weeks and all restrictions were going to be lifted at 37 weeks, so hang in there :) Good luck and congrats! Being a mom is the best thing I've ever done!!!!!

Hello A.,

my name is T. i havent really been active to this group in a long time but i read your situation.. and i just wanted to let you know if you need help let me know, i had my son jonathan at 24 weeks and was on strict bedrest with my other 2 children and i know how hard it can be and i remember not having much help so i know how it is...
email me if you would like and we can talk more.. my email address is ____@____.com
Hugs T.

Hello there. I have been exactly where you are. I went into premature labor with my 2nd child, I was 32 weeks, and I was in labor for 2 days before i knew it. I was hospilized for 3 days they used magnesium to stop the contractions (that is the worst).. and i was sent home on complete bedrest my daughter was 19 months old. Just some suggestions.. do not take out trash, vaccuum, or bathe your baby.. lifting a baby in out of tub, will pull on your stomache, you will need to rely on others to help you as much as you can, as nerve racking as that is. My son was born at almost 36 weeks and he was 7lbs 4 oz. Good Luck to you.. Suggestions to keep your little one entertained, we colored, we used water paints, we played toys, we read..and we would "snuggle" to watch tv/cartoons so mommy could get rest. The time goes by really fast. With the weather being nice just as it was when i went through it, I would take her outside and let her play with a ball while I sat.

I had some of these same problems with my first at 29 weeks. However, I was placed on full bed rest until 34 weeks. At 34 weeks my doctor took me off of bed rest because the baby was safe to be delivered anytime after 34 weeks. So hold in there for 1 more week and then you can rest easy.

Some dilation and effacement is to be expected at your stage of pregnancy, especially since this is not your first pregnancy. Keep yourself as hydrated as you possibly can. Rest and take baths when you can. Drinking fluids, bathing and resting are ways to get those practice contractions to stop. If it is indeed real labor, they will not stop. But, premature labor can be brought on by overactivity. So, as much as you can, try to take it easy. Watching videos worked sometimes with my daughter while I was pregnant with our son.

God bless,
A.

Take some relaxation baths and just keep your feet up as much as possible. Try to have family and friends such as neighbors come over to help out so you can rest. Some dialation and effacement is not uncommon at that stage of pregnancy. You could dialate and efface like you did and then stop until you go into actual labor. Also be sure to drink plenty of fluids. Watch movies and read books with your little one to keep him occupied for a while. Good luck and God bless.
D.

I am 31 and have been married for almost 12 yrs. My husband and I have 3 wonderful boys ages 10,7 and 4.

Here is my advice for rest.
In a room that you can close off, put a comfy chair, foot stool, and a mattress on the floor, plus toys and books, music and/or TV.
Have some drinks and snacks at hand.
Stay in there with your 16 month old.
He can play, you can read to him, he and you can nap, he can jump on the mattress, you can put your feet up, and so on.
Best wishes.