Should I put a door knob cover to prevent toddlers from getting out of her room at night?

Are you seriously asking is it wrong to secure your 3 year old to a space that is safe instead of wandering around the house unsupervised doing who knows what???? Ummm, yes it is. If you try the gate and she climbs over it, put up 2 one on top of the other, and if all these fail, use a terry cloth robe tie and tie her ankle to the bed post. Any and all of these are much safer than a wandering toddler throughout the house. 100's of bad things could happen before she comes and wakes you up. Good luck.

One morning I came out to find my son sitting on top of the stove turning it on and off. Thankfully I caught him in time and he didn't get burned. He also knew how to open doors and we lived temporarily off a very busy road and I was afraid he would open the door and go right out. So, I put the door knob cover on. At first I was afraid of fires and him not being able to ge out as another has suggested and then I thought, the odds of a fire occuring are a lot more slim than my child leaving the house or climbing back onto the stove. He pitched a fit for 2 nights and I found him asleep on the floor in front of the door. After about a month a took the cover off with out him noticing. He was trained at this point to stay in his room. If he noticed it was off and came out I just asked him if he wanted the lock back on his door. He'd say no and run back to bed. I did the same thing with my daughter and it worked in less time with her. So, I think you will be fine doing it. Use it as a training tool-just as long as it is needed.

We had this problem with our oldest child. Now this kid had gone through an overseas move and back and two earthquakes within two years of her first four on earth so you wonder if those incidents had anything to do with her insomnia. She's never said. Anyway, when we moved back to the states and her nighttime wanderings increased we thought that perhaps she needed some sort of sense of security she wasn't getting. We adopted an older, female dog who immediately began sleeping in X's room. The night wanderings stopped immediately.
X is now 11 1/2, the dog still sleeps in her room (mostly) and they both slept through Hurricane Ike.
Hope this helps if the doorknobs don't. Good luck.

I think it is just fine to do that. I had a friend that had to do that and her daughter slept in front of the door a night or two and after that got the idea that she had to get in her bed. Now she sleeps just fine. Once they hit that independent stage I say do what it takes! Best of luck to you:)

At three I was terrified to get out of bed. Lucky she is a girl and gets her feelings hurt eaisly. Scold her and tell her how dissapointed you are. It will surly hurt her feelings. If thats not what you are wanting she should learn that she cannot leave her bed till morning. I would use the weekend to camp outside her door. When she opens it stirnly tell her "Get back in bed and stay there". It truly works. Your doing this for her saftey. I would definatly put a child proof knob on any closet doors with ac, chemicals, or anything else she can hurt her self with. She should get into trouble because its not just about play time for her its about the dangers around the house. I think it would be FINE to put child proof knobs on her door. Also putting a lock high on the front door will prevent her from getting outside. My best advice is training her to stay in bed till morning. Good luck.

I have two kids who did that as well. I was not comfortable locking them in their rooms so I did the putting them back to bed without any emotion thing. Yes, it was exhausting but it worked and they learned. I will say it takes being very consistent and alot of patience. It doesn't happen within a couple of nights. I would try to start with a gate if you feel you need to keep her in her room. Some of my friends have stacked one gate over another so they can't climb over.

I would be traumatized if I got locked in my room at night! What if you put up a children's gate (sturdy one, got mine at ikea) so the door can be open and you sleep on an air mattress right outside her door for a few nights. That way she knows she's not supposed to be out wandering but she doesn't feel abandoned. She'll realize how pointless it is and by the end of the week she'll be trained I bet. When she wakes up just gently reassure her, stroke her, say mommy's right here, time to go back to sleep...Good luck! That's a pain your bedroom is so far away. She probably feels that and wants to be close.

I would try the gate accross the door first and then whenever she gets up, walk her immediately back to her room/bed and do not say anything to her. (that is so hard not to say " you need to go to sleep now". We tried this for a while and it worked. The key is to not talk to the child. Any kind of conversation is a reward for them and they will keep getting up. It's hard but be patient. I would try this before any lock. I would be afraid that would be traumatizing her. Good luck!

I have 5 yr old twins that get out of the bed & get up some mornings before we do & they & get into stuff, like climbing on the stools & chairs to get what they want. Out of fear of them hurting themselves we turned the doorknob around with the lock side to the outside & after they fall asleep we lock their door. We use baby monitors to monitor them incase they need to go potty, get ill during the night etc. You might could try that
They have ALWAYS gotten up & gotten in our bed or their older sisters beds. We tried the putting them back in bed every time they got up, but it never ended! So thats when we decided to turn the door knob around & lock it. That has worked well for us! Just be sure to put a baby monitor in her room & out of her reach so you can hear if something is wrong. (maybe hang it on a nail over a closet) My mom thinks its terrible that we do this, but it has taught them to stay in their own bed & its a safety precaution to keep them from getting injured climbing & getting into things.

Think about fires. It is good that she can open her own door. Maybe if you left the door open to begin with she would feel safer? We had this problem with my oldest. After sticking with the routine for 2 whole weeks...yes I know that is a LONG time but she is S T U B B O R N....she does great....(she also sleep walks and has night terrors but that is a different story) On the nights that she doesn't have any of those problems she stays all night in her bed though. Good luck I know It is stressful!

Yes I think it is ok to use the lock. My daugther moved into a toddler bed early and did just fine until she realized she could open her door. We debated putting up a gate or the door knob cover on the inside of her door. We decided to use the lock so we didn't have to climb over the gate in the middle of the night when we needed to go in there. It took a while of getting up and banging on the door but she figured it out. She now knocks on her door when she is ready to get up in the morning. I don't think she has been traumatized at all.

Hi S.-

We used the door knob covers with each of our older children. My son (first child) could climb child gates so that didn't work for us. His room was right at the top of the stairs and although he could navigate the stairs without a problem during the day, we were afraid at night he might tumble when half asleep. We used it again when our daughter started coming out of her room in an effort to avoid staying in bed. Once she learned that this is how it would be, she settled down and started sleeping. We took the lock off shortly thereafter and explained that we could always go back to using it if she couldn't stay in bed. I think we had to mention it to her maybe 2 or 3 times after than to remind her, but for the most part it solved the problem.

By the way, they are now 7 and 5 and are fine with going to bed and staying in their beds.

Good luck,
K.

I used a baby proof knob when my kids were little. I also had a monitor. 8 - 10 yrs later, no trauma resulted.

My son is an escape artist as well and has been able to thwart all attempts to keep him in his bed at night. We did have to put up two gates at his door because with just one he can climb over. He can open the gate on the stairs and climb up the front door to unlock it. What ever you do, I have a strong suggestion that an emergency responder recommended to me: Put your telephone number in her pajamas! I know it sounds strange but she said that these little escapees are often not missed until morning so the calls they get at night are for found children. In desperation, I did put our number on masking tape and put it on my son's back at night. It was very handy on my anniversary when my sister in law was watching the babies. I got the call right after we paid the bill and were able to get him in just minutes. As awful as it was, I would have been horrified to come home and find him gone and no idea where to start looking.

We have not had to have the gates up in a few months. He will come into our room early in the morning but it's within acceptable distance from the alarm so this is our compromise. Once she gets used to staying in her room, it gets easier and their little sleep patterns adjust. Oh, and we ended up also putting extra hardware on the front door of the house that he could not reach with any home made ladder or extending tool. It's amazing what these guys can do! Good luck!

Hi S.,
Sorry, but I think you are going to have to continue being conistant. I shudder to think about a child in a locked room......what you might try is one of those gates where she cannot get out of the room but can still roam and play should she wake up. That way- you may still be able to hear her if she crys and she will eventually just fall asleep back in her room.
good luck and blessings

I use a child monitor so I know what's going on that side of the house and do lock their doors or use knob covers as needed. I feel that it keeps them safe since they can go outside or turn on the stove or get in the fridge (I do have safety locks on all these things but they can still get around them so I figure better safe then sorry.) I tried the gate thing but they just climb over.

S., mom to 5

With our first son we apparently had no idea about the knob safegaurds and it became an issue of us being afraid for his safety, since coming into our room was the last thing on his mind, we were so tired from working and all the other daily activities that we slept pretty soundly, he was in his room, we knew he was safe, so we actually turned the knob around and locked it from the outside and he didn't like it but soon adjusted, I fely like a monster but it turnedout fine and when he would wake up and need something he would lay on the floor and talk or yell through the space between it and the door. Child will be fine and you guys need to sleep!

I don't think you should put that lock on her door. My now 4 year did this and at first, we weren't sure if she was scared of the dark or what. So we put night lights and when that didn't work we bought her a low watt bulb for her main light on her ceiling fan and kept it on all night. That seemed to help at first, but then she started again. So, I decided to just keep taking her back upstairs. It took me about 1 week, but it worked. You just have to make sure you're not making it "special". The first time she comes down tell her no you can't sleep in our room and then take her upstairs and put her in bed. Then after that no more talking to her. Just hold her by the hand and take her back up and put her in bed and leave the room. Don't stay and wait for her to go to sleep. If you do this every single time she comes down it WILL work. I went to work half asleep everyday that wee, but I didn't give up because I knew it would be a long term reward. Don't give up and make sure to have your husband help by taking turns, but again no talking to her after the first time. Good luck!

I used to put a gate at my daughter's door, that way I could hear her if she needed me, but she did not feel trapped by the door knob thingy, but I do not think there is really any problem with your idea either.

With locking your child's bedroom door, you may get to the point that she start crying out loud, probably waking you up anyway.

Have you tried locking doors to areas or rooms you definitely don't want her visiting at night? If that is possible.

Locking your bedroom door will probably bring some knocks at the door, but then, if it comes to this, maybe this would work:

<I just answered similarly to the "Crying it out" request (from Rhonda).>

This is not a method I was comfortable using <letting a 7-mo-old "cry it out">. I liked Dr Sears' advice a lot better. I can't accurately recall Dr Sears' method (my boys are 15, 10 and 7 years old already!). But what I do remember is

1) get your child in bed and turn off the light (not including any night light you might be using)

2) stand at the doorway of the bedroom and wait; what you want to do here is be audible so your child knows you are there (hears you hum quietly or hears the floor boards creak, my best was a quiet tap on the door frame), staying there until your child falls asleep,

3) then repeat each time your child wakes up,

as the number of times of waking up decreases and as he/she falls asleep faster, you stand further back, not at the doorway, yet make some slight noise so he knows you are there. From this point, you spend less and less time at the bedroom door or outside the bedroom door, and, hopefully, less times during the night. Until it is not needed any more.

However, this method worked for me, and is recommended, for children as they get close to 3-yrs-old, which, for a lot of kids, is the "I want to be independent" stage; not for a 7-mo-old.

Good luck to you S..

I feel your pain! We had the same struggle with my daughter and it was a tough one for us! At first, we put up a safety gate, and I know there are plenty of moms who would be shocked to hear that I locked her in her room with a baby gate, but we did have a baby monitor in there and it was the only way to keep her in bed. It stopped working once she figured out how to climb over the gate. I struggled with the idea of a baby proof knob on her door and my husband would not let me do it. The solution? We put it on MY bedroom door! She was free to move around, but she no longer had access to me, which is what she wanted. And, it worked!!! She knocked on our door in the middle of the night a few times, and it did take a few nights of me picking her up and putting her back in her bed without saying a word, but she stayed in her bed after she realized that she would end up in her bed again anyway. Best of luck, and I commend you for making sure she sleeps in her own room! I have a stubborn daughter, too, and I don't expect the power struggles to end anytime soon! :)

I use child gates. That way she's not so closed off, but she can't get out. Good luck!

My son consistenly wakes up some nights btwn 2-4AM. He's 4 now & can navigate the stairs if needed..........so we just leave the light on in the stairwell so he can see.

I know my son would freak out in the middle of the night if he woke up locked inside his own room (personally I would too) - that would cause another entire host of issues.

We have locks on all the other rooms in the upstairs area & used a baby gate until last year right at the top of the stairs. I had the same concerns as you - what's he doing up there all alone & what if he falls down the stairs.

We bought him a little blow up mattress w/ a Cars sleeping bag for Christmas that we keep at the foot of our bed - I would say 4 nights out of the week when he wanders into our room he sleeps on that Cars sleeping bag. He feels safer being close to us. The other 3 nights he sleeps thru the night.

One thing that you need to look at is how was her "day" the night of the wanderings. Is she overly tired OR did she sleep too much if she still naps. I tried to cut out my sons naps to make him sleep better once he hit 3........that lasted about 2 weeks. He actually is a better sleeper at night (& easier to deal w/) when he naps every other day for 1.5 hrs in the afternoon.

Just food for thought.

I use the door knob handle on the inside with my two year old. My son began climbing out of his crib at 20 months. All of the bedrooms in our house are upstairs and I was very concerned about his safety. He is very adept at climbing and I felt that he would outsmart the gate (he has figured out how to open the other gates in our house). I use a baby monitor all night to ensure that I can hear him if he experiences any distress. I was a little concerned about if there was a fire, but I feel that my son would need me to come and rescue him no matter what because of his age - I do not think he could understand the escape plan. He does very well sleeping in his room at night and he plays with his toys in the morning until I come and get him.

I used the child proof door knob covers when my son was a baby and he was not traumatized or anything. We had a baby monitor so it wasn't like he was unsupervised, and he was an escape artist so a gate was out of the question.

Another thing that my parents did with me, since a gate also did not work, was attach a screen door to my bedroom doorway. That way they could see and hear me but I couldn't get out. (This was before baby monitors lol.)

Do what works for you to keep your child safe and keep your sanity!

How about a baby gate? Is she too tall or would she climb over it? Just a thought...

My kids don't like their door closed at night. Try a gate on her doorway with the door open. Or, gates on the areas you don't want her to go into. Or the door knob covers on all the other doors. But, I wouldn't want my child not to be able to get out of her room at night, in case of fire or something. I wouldn't want to be locked in my room. That's a bit scary. You could try it a few nights and it would scare her enough that you could take it off on the condition that she doesn't leave her room, but call for you instead? But, I would only do that as a last resort.

My female twin has been able to unlock doors since she was 2 and a half...she has been an escape artist all of her life and with finding her often in my backyard JUST from my using the restroom, we decided for safety's sake to lock them in at night.

This prevents us from being a statistic with a child found dead outside their parents homeor on the mornign news with an amber alert from a child having gone missing due to her letting herself or her and her twin brother out while we were sleeping.

Now that they are older (4), I unlock the door when I go to bed and they let themselves out in the morning and come in my room to use the potty and tell to get up and make them breakfast...

You all can judge me if you want, but it kept my kids safe and out of harms way at a time when they didn't know any better...

Good Luck and best wishes... ;-)

You need to do what works for you! I would tell her about the lock and why before I did it. I'd also make sure I had a monitor or some type of intercom that she knows how to use so that she could reach you if she needed you. What if she got sick? Or had a scary dream? Or needed to use the restroom? I would also only use it as long as needed. I can't see that it would be traumatic if she could reach you...

We use the gate in front of the closed door. I would only say no to the door knob thing because of fire. If she can open the door she can yell at you if something is wrong. If she can't open the door and something is wrong can you always hear her??

My husbands mom used to put little latch locks on all the doors at the topp she didn't want him in. And my mom put rubberbands on the door knobs to a nail outside. After a few tries at night and much frustration neithor of us tried anything again.

Hope this helps
R.

P.S. we tried the putting them back into bed thing for 4 months and they didn't stop till we put up the gate.

This is a sleep issue, not a door knob issue. I know some people that have put the knob covers on the inside of the child's door. I think this is a struggle you are going to have to continue fighting. Try to find out why she is getting up at night. Is she having night terrors, bad dreams, or is she just plain lonely?? If she can talk, ask her simple questions to try to get to the answer. Many kids at this age think they are missing out on something when they are sent to bed. Let her stay up late one night to see that Mommy and Daddy do nothing exciting when she goes to sleep.

My youngest was sleeping by himself, going to sleep on his own until his brother convinced him he was afraid of the dark! It took a while but he is back to going to sleep on his own and staying in his bed.

Good luck!

S. -

I think if you ask yourself to not look at your lack of sleep but more of what is your responsibility to her, as a parent?
As a child, would you like to be locked in your room? At night? Would you feel comfortable with her unsupervised in her room in the middle of the night, up and about?

I know it's hard but as a parent, yes, the more responsible thing to do is set limits with her on what your rules are in the house. That means you and your husband tag-team and after a few nights all should be fine - it may even take a week or whatever but I am sure you'd feel better that you solved this problem responsibly rather than irresponsibly and uncaringly - in this country we are so supported to "control" our kids but that is rediculous - try and pull out of that and focus on what "you" know is best - coming from your heart and from your smarts as a responsible parent setting clear boundaries to teach her child.

Hope this has helped -
Alli

We went throught the same thing with our son. These are the times when we kept telling ourselves, "Just think how he's gonna be as a teen!" I did decide to use the knob thing on his door b/c we were also upstairs and I was worried about him falling down the stairs at night. I don't think there is anything wrong with it. We explained the whole situation to him over & over about how it was dangerous for him to come out of his room at night, and finally put the knobs on. For us it wasn't so much an issue of him keeping us up (though that was part of the problem), but the safety of our son.