"My Nine Year Old Daughter Is Getting Stomach Aches at Bedtime"

My 11 year old daughter is a drama queen over such things. I'll placate her in some instances, but when it becomes an issue of 'just get over it', I get a little more firm. I'll remind her of when she was fine just a few minutes ago and this new pattern of anxiety over nothing is not healthy. When gentle firmness hasn't been enough (and I'm absolutely certain there's nothing really wrong - or we'd be at the dr.), I'll sometimes have to get a little tough...telling her that lack of sleep for the both of us is making us more irritable and only causing her anxiety to heighten. And, by golly, if she can get one night of really good sleep, she and I will both feel better and will probably solve the whole thing. (In the back of my mind I stew that if I don't get a good night's sleep, her buns will not feel very good...but will breathe and let it go, knowing I just need a nap.) =)

Hi M.,

I'm sorry you're going through this. If anxiety is the issue, my 9-year-old son and I read this book:
http://www.amazon.com/What-When-You-Worry-Much/dp/1591473...
It has a great explanation of what anxiety is on the child's level, and has many practical techniques to deal with it. My son and I have been using them for nearly a year, and they've helped a lot! We also bought a child's relaxation CD for him to listen to at bedtime that gives him guided relaxation. Here's a link to it:
http://www.amazon.com/Can-Relax-Relaxation-CD-Children/dp...

For a stomach-ache with a physical cause, I recommend peppermint tea, warm or chilled. Most kids like it. If she doesn't, give her a peppermint to suck on to settle her stomach.

Hope this helps!

H.

My five year-old went through that too. Every night. Always before bed. I always blew her off since "stomach pain" sounds so generic and I just thought she didn't want to go to bed. Then there are the times I blew her off and she threw up on me then I feel terrible.

What I learned from this is that pain should always be taken seriously. The thing about kids is that any discomfort is described as "pain" so it is hard to figure out what is causing it.

My first instinct is constipation. It would mostly affect her when she is laying down, can follow bouts of diarrhea and can cause nausea. (stop giving her the pepto...it can make it worse). Make sure she is going to the bathroom regularly. She could even have a blockage...lay her down and press gently in little circular motions between her hip bones...see if you feel any hard stool in there. Certainly ask her about her recent pooping.

If you think this is it, make sure you extra-hydrate her and give her a stool softener. They have really gentle glycerine suppositories at your local pharmacy if she doesn't get relief in the next day or so.

Even though it is annoying, she is still your baby and still deserves to be treated with love and tenderness so if she does have a problem, she knows you will always be there for her!

If you rule out constipation, I would have her seen by her pediatrician. They can do "upper and lower GI series" which is a method of looking at your gastric system and diagnosing problems. Good luck, I hope you both can get some rest!

My 8 year old just recently went through this. I finally had enough of it and took her to the doctor. He ran urine tests on her and she ended up having a urinary tract infection. which would hurt when she was laying down, worse than when standing. I felt so horrible for not believing her that her tummy hurt, but she has been known to cry wolf with an upset stomach before. She doesn't run to me and tell me her stomach hurts now, unless it does.

If you haven't already, I would take her to the doctor to rule out anything. Maybe she feels anxious about going to school the next day for some reason. Let us know what you find out.

Have you taken her to doctor about this? It could a a appentide or gall bladder. I had stomach cramps and found out it was my appendix. Does she drink soda drinks alot, also can cause that too. I have a five years old who did and now we stop soda at night and no pain for her. Hope everything goes okay with her

could it be she's having heartburn and doesn't have the vocabulary to describe it adequately? That often comes about about bedtime or shortly after. Just a thought.
L.

Hi, M.. I haven't had this with my children, but we tackled it during my aunt's illness.

First of all, it's good that she's consciously aware of the anxiety because you can address it up front. Since she anticipates it daily, you can start talking about it at a certain time during the day before it becomes a problem. Chamomile tea or Valerian might help with the anxiety. Maybe some tea in the evening can be a soothing bonding time with her mother.

Another route: Teach her some deep-breathing and hypnotherapy (to focus on a special, peaceful place/thing)...even to visualize little people (her preference) coming into her body and washing away whatever yuk she's feeling. You might have done something like that during your pregnancy (in preparation for labor and delivery) and during your cancer treatment. (By the way, congrats on that!) I guess the point is to help her find a peaceful point before she feels bad, so you can psychologically bring her back to it during those times. Remind her ahead of time that she's not really sick and that she can turn it around.

Also,

I have a nine year old son that does the same thing. He always wanted Pepto, said his stomach hurt, needed water, didn't feel well. He would be like, I know it is because I ate this or because I ate that... and so on. It would take an hour or two for him to just calm down! I do think it is all a mental thing. I told him that I would give him my "special Spray" It is Arbonnes Aromatherapy for RELAX... I am honestly not sure if it is just because He thinks it helps or if it actually does but since I have been spraying his sheets at night he gets in bed with ease. I basically read him the bottle and told him that it would help his stomach and he would be able to sleep better. He believes it so hopefully he will grow out of it and sleep on his own... I would rather do that then the pepto thing though...

My three yr old was doing the same thing....upset stomach with or without vomiting for quite a while...and well it turned out to be food allergies. That was his ONLY symptom. The only other thing that I can think of would be heartburn or maybe acid reflux. I'd make sure she's eating several hours before bed and not drinking alot right before she lays down. You could also give her a tums and tell her it's to make her stomach feel better....it won't hurt her and it'll make it seem as if you are sympathizing with her too. Hey, if you get the Tums with Calcium it'll be like a vitamin..:-)

Good luck,
M.

I agree that to her it is real. This has actually happened to me before. She could be nervous about having bad dreams too. Maybe the nervousness about having a tummy ache is causing the ache.

When something like this happens to one of my kids, I pray w/them. I don't know how you feel about God. But when I don't pray w/them, they make sure I do b/c they feel comforted that I consider their concern important. I remind them that everyone of their concerns matters to God. Nothing is too small and He cares.

Rule out any physical concerns first and then reassure her that her body is healing. Speak to her positively and tell her that she will have peaceful sleep. Your belief in her can heal her too. It is amazing!

Blessings,
Mom to 5 Wonderful Kids
www.4MyChildrenSake.com

I went thru the same thing when I was about that age. My mom died of cancer and since I saw her sick all the time I was worried the same would happen to me and I basically caused myself to be feeling sick. It was all anxiety induced and lasted for years until my father told me my mom died peacefully in a coma. The last time I saw her she was screaming in pain. My point being, something may have triggered this and though it may all be in her head, it is real to her and the feelings are just as bad. I would just talk to her and see if she has some kind of fear of something or anxiety. It was amazing that with one comment I was able to let go of something that bothered me for years. The pepto may just be a bandaid on the real issue.

i agree with the woman who wrote before me... it is good that you know it is happening every night, but i don't think you should do pepto b.... the tea idea is good, another is a homeopathic remedy called calms forte. really helps you wind down. and peppermint is good for an upset tummy. an eye pillow might help her sleep, and lots and lots of hugs! i know anxiety well, and it does build on itself, no fun. so, these ideas not only work, but they give you and your daughter the sense that you can actually do something about the situation.

Hi M.,

It's weird that it only happens at night time. Do you think maybe something is bothering her? Maybe something is going on in school that she gets to nervous to want to go to school. Or maybe she's probably caught the famous stomach virus. It usually lasts about a week. My girls and my husband got it. These were their symptoms nausea, stomach cramps, fever and diarreah. Nothing will take it away, it's a horrible virus. But you can buy a bottle of Papaya pills OTC. They are natural so you can start her off with 6-8 pills. They are sweet so she can chew them. And you can keep giving them to her until she feels a little better. She can eat the whole bottle and it will not harm her. Like I said it's natural so it's ok. Or you can just buy the real papaya fruit and give it to her. If she likes it great but if she doesn't like the smell or taste you can add a little sugar or squeeze some lemon; however she prefers it as long as she eats it. Papaya is very good for the stomach. Another thing you can do is give her some Chamomile tea and she can drink it through out the day. Give her a warm one at night that way she can calm down and get a good nights rest. Well, hope this will help her a bit. Hope she get's better.

I.

If the doctor has checked her and she has no medical problems maybe it is something else.
Kinda see when she comes in with her problem and what is she doing before and if that does not help take her to see a Physiologists. Maybe it is the attention she is getting from you when she says she is sick, since you are not around that much.
My daughter took a long time to sleep over at peoples house because she was not ready -her excuse was her tummy hurt , her head hurt and she was going to throw up. So she woould have to be brougth home. Luckly our friends understood and worked with us till she was ready it took us 1yr and 1/2. Kids get sick for many reasons you have to work woith it until you find out what it is.
Good luck and have patience with her.

I would not hestitate to take her to a Dr. if you have not allready. My daughter was having stomach issues and lost 6 pounds and it ended up being a urinary tract infection. Who knew! That is the thing, there really could be something wrong. If she is not getting sick anymore and is still worried I guess that is a different problem.

i think there is something bothering her ,i had a 11 yr old son with an ulcer he also complaned his stomach hurt to be on the safe said take her to the DR
L.