Kids Who Ask Questions Constantly and How to Best Answer Them

It depends. On my mood. On what they are doing that she is asking about (for ex: the Depends trip, lol).
I never stopped at "I don't know" though. You can follow it with "What do you think?" or something that is more leading... "I don't know. Maybe she needs something from the store." (regarding the neighbor in the car). Or "I don't know, there could be a lot of reasons why he is driving a red truck. We are driving a ____. Maybe he likes red, or needs a truck to carry stuff in for his house/yard/work? Or maybe it was what he got a good deal on when he was shopping. Or ___."

I find that at that age, it can be helpful to HELP them learn to think beyond... there ISN'T always a concrete answer. So help them learn that. There could be a myriad of reasons why _______...but they don't have a broad enough background of experiences to grasp that. Help them gain that broader understanding. To mentally go through some possibilities...
But, yes... sometimes... I was too mentally tired to get into long explanations. Those times were when I relied on "I don't know. What do you think?" lol

It's frustrating, but just try to remain patient. Questions are the way they learn. It's okay to give a "Maybe he's driving a red truck because he likes red, and he needs a truck to haul things, but we don't know because we can't ask him."

I love kids who ask questions!

You need to keep on your toes. There are questions and there are questions. You can respond with information, or you can respond with imagination (as distinct from lies). I think that to come up with a fake answer and pretend it's true is mean - but then that could lead to a good conversation about honesty!

"Why are the leaves falling off the trees?" can be answered by what you remember from science class or by, "I don't remember quite how it works, but when we get home we'll find out." And then do it. Computers can be wonderful.

"What is Grandma getting at the store?" can be answered by, "When she comes out, we can ask, and maybe she'll tell us and maybe she won't. We won't be nosy. It's her business."

"Why is that man driving a red truck?" can be answered by, "I don't know, but let's play a game. Why do you think he is driving a red truck? What if he drove a blue truck - would that be better?" You can make up a what-if sort of game about it.

"Where is that lady going?" "I don't know - where do you imagine she's going? I think... maybe she is going to the zoo to visit the baboons." From this sort of conversation, imagination grows. This can be fun, but you'll have to lead the way in it until your daughter knows how to play.

Here's a good one: "Mommy, why is that lady so fat?" "I don't know that lady, and it's unkind to talk about how people look, so we'll talk about something else for a while." When the lady is out of range, you might say, "Some people are fat because they don't take care of their bodies. Some are fat because they have been ill. Maybe she isn't fat. Maybe she used to be a lot fatter, but she's exercising and eating right and now she's actually skinnier." Here, you're presenting a different reasonable way of interpreting what you have seen.

You can also sometimes say, "Ask me that later." But later, if she asks, you need to answer, so you're not off the hook.

Remember: Sometimes a child asks question after question not to get answers but to get attention. It's perfectly fine to declare a moratorium on all questions for the next ten minutes... or to declare an "I'll ask YOU questions now" time, when she has to give the answers.

It all means you have to keep your brain working - which isn't a bad thing. But if you can quell the urge to yell, "SHUT UP!" or, "Mind your own business!" you're going in the right direction, I think.

Our child could be like this and sometimes, I did admit, "That is a good question, I do not know, but remind me when we get home and we can look that up. "

My husband would sometimes give outrageous answers. Our daughter would call him on it.

The Red Truck question, I would answer with "I do not know, What color would you pick if you had a truck? Why" Make her come up with some answers..

I SO know what you mean. My son (God Bless his inquisitive little heart!) has always had SOOOOOO many questions. I just try--really try to answer as best as I can, look stuff up when we can, etc.

I kind of hate to tell you this but he's 8 and NOW the questions are like this "Mom, who would win this battle? A Messerschmitt or a p51 Mustang?" Lord help me!

It exhausting, isn't it? I usually say, "Hmmm, that's an interesting question." Sometimes that's enough to get my son going on his own ideas as to why. If that's not enough, I'll continue, "Maybe, the man driving the red truck just really likes the color red. What color truck would you want?" or "That girl could be going to work or going to the grocery store. What other places might she be going?"

At that age it's really not about being nosey or getting into other people's business. It's more about their fascination with the world, their fascination with language. They aren't focused on bills and laundry and other adult concerns. They don't spend energy on that, so they have all kinds of energy to use towards the birds in the sky and the many different colors of brown in the mud.

Totally normal! Still exhausting for moms. Do your best to encourage her when you can. When you just don't have the energy, you could try saying, "Mommy really needs to get dinner ready. Can you play quietly right now and save some of your questions for later?" That often works with my 5 year old.

Totally normal, sound like she is very intelligent. It's ok saying I don't know, it's even ok to say I think thats enough questions today! (and it's OK to say we can discuss that when you are older, or that is none of your business!) My son also went through that and there is a point where it can drive you nuts! Just answer the best you can. For example if she asks why does he drive a red truck you can say maybe he like red. Where is my friend going is a definite I don't know but maybe we can ask them later. We definitely need to be creative thinkers with all these questions!

I would not feel bad saying I don't know when you honestly do not...you are not super human and you are not all knowing and that is something your child should on some level begin to understand. Asking rhetorical questions like What do you think are a good way to get his little gears a turning. Also for none stop questioners I have said simply when I was exhausted that I was not taking any more questions at this time = ) Then deflect and get them occupied with Doing something. Also I have imposed a limit of questions especially when we have been trapped in a car and offered to do sing a longs instead = ) Good luck...the natural curiosity of children can be beautiful and somedays it can drive the sanest mommy crazy = ) Have a great day.

I have a 10 year old who still does this and it drives me crazy. She asks the questions of a 4-year old like "why is that house pink?" or "where is our neighbor going?" when she sees them leave.

I have discovered that this is her way of trying to communicate with me. I suspect, those unanswerable questions are less curiosity and more just wanting to talk.

I guess this because I've decided to try to go the other route and answer her questions! Once she asked where our neighbor was going and I said "I don't know, let's find out!" So I yelled "Hey Mr. Neighbor, where are you going on this fine day?" He said "Church!" and then I turned to my daughter and said "there you go, he's going to church." She was HORRIFIED that I would ASK him. So I said "well, I can't read his mind so the only way to find out was to ask him. I did and you got your answer--isn't that what you wanted?"

She did ask why a house was painted a horrible pink color so I pulled over and made like I was going to walk up to the front door and ask them. She begged me not to.

Another time she wanted to know which was faster, a rocket ship or a racing car. So we went to the library to look it up. Now, I love looking things up in the library but suddenly she didn't care so much about which was faster.

Because she is older, I had a talk with my daughter about how every question does have an answer and if she really wants to know something then she should ask me and I'm there to help her find the answer. And by asking me, she's telling me that she REALLY wants to know. So she should save asking me questions for those things she really wants to know--because we're going to find out. I think that let her know that I'm there to help her find answers, but I'm not here to be bugged by things she can figure out for herself, or that she doesn't need to know.

When she goes back to asking me a lot of questions again I take that as she just wants to have a conversation. So I will often say "are you asking me these questions because you want to know, or because you want to have a conversation? Because I'm happy to talk with you about something more interesting."

Ah yes, I have one of those too! It is exhausting and all our friends notice it too! I do what some of the others mentioned...I take the questions further. After I ask her what she thinks, we explore options. Sometimes I come up with crazy options just for fun and to get her imagination going and sometimes I come up with legitimate options. She is now starting to come up with stuff on her own. I try to be as patient as possible, but some days are harder than others!! She is almost 4 by the way.

Well as far as the red truck goes, when my 3 1/2 yr old asks that question I just tell her that maybe he likes the color red. Thats why he has a red truck. Or if she askes "where is the kid going?" I tell her "I don't know, maybe he is going to visit his grandma" And then the answer I get from her is " oh that is very nicely of them" LOL!! I know that it is hard but try to give as much information, even if you really don't know. My daughter drops the question when I tell her these things. I would just say that grandma needs to get a few things at the store. If they ask what just tell them a few things that she needs and I am not sure what they are. Even if I don't know the person I will make something up. Just to try to answer her question.
Best of luck and hang in there.

Oh I feel so lucky I am not to the harder questions yet. my son is two and runs around pointing to everything asking "whats that?"

Oh DVMmom-

I feel your pain! Megan...my youngest...talked NON STOP! Even in her sleep...no lie!

Maybe it is because her twin wasn't able to talk early on...and megan was 'talking/asking' for two?? Not sure. But it WAS tedious! I sometimes would say 'maybe it's time to give your mouth a rest...I know my ears are getting tired'...

Sounds rude, I know...but geesh!!

Now they are almost 15...she speaks her mind for sure...but NOT constantly thank goodness!

Hang in!
Michele/cat

Just do the best you can. "I don't know" is a valid answer. If it's something you might want to find out (like a scientific question), investigate together as a fun project.

I had to laugh at another post. My first, and favorite, sentence as a young child was, "Whazzat? Whazzat, Momma?" followed by "Why?" Drove.Her.Crazy. I'm sure I got my share of "I don't know" answers.

I ask the question back. Why do u think he drives a red truck? Teaches them to think on their own.

In hindsight, it is obvious to me that this was their way of trying to interact with me. Therefore, what I would do now is maybe just take a few minutes to do some one-on-one with them, whether it's answering the questions or maybe just redirecting it to something else, like playing a game.

In terms of answering questions, just answer them as you see fit. If the question is not your daughter's business, you can tell her that. "Grandma's purchases are not really our business."

But meanwhile, realize they just like talking with mommy.

My 2 and 3 year old do this too. I try to answer the best I can, but my standard replies to ones I can't answer are usually, "I don't know, what do you think?" or "That's just the way God made it." If they also say, "I don't know." Then I just say "some questions don't have answers." Those usually suffice for awhile!
HTH,
A.

Great question, and wonderful responses!

These questions are better than Why? Why? Why? I thought y'all would appreciate the incredible Dr. Feynman answering a WHY question about magnetism. LOL! He went off on what WHY means, like when we ask, "why" someone went to the hospial... Why someone called an ambulance or why there, or what the injury was? When we answer "Why" - the part of "why" we are answering says more about us and our perception of the piece of the question than on the actuality since the reasons go off in multiple directions and depths.

Enjoy: Jeez, Dr. Feynman, I'm sorry I asked http://blogs.suntimes.com/ebert/science-and-not/jeez-dr-f...

I bought my son a dictionary and taught him how to use it. If I don't know (and sometimes even if I do), I tell him to look it up.

If it's not dictionary material, I might say, "I'm not sure. That's a good question to ask ________ (eye doctor, medial doctor, friends who know about cars, etc)."

He likes to ask me things like "Why is that man driving a red truck" just like your daughter. I've started replying with, "To get from one place to another" or "Probably because it's the truck he owns", etc.

When all else fails, we can head to the library and look at an encyclopedia. In all honesty, the curiosity usually fades before we get to this step.

my favorite answer "what do you think?"