I have been married for 6 years and have 3 children. My husband and i thought we were done having children after our 3rd baby. He had a vasectomy on Nov 3 and then on Nov 6 we found out that i was pregnant again. At first we were kinda upset but then we got really excited. My husband was more excited than i was. Our one last chance to have another one. My other 3 pregnancies were perfect, absolutely nothing wrong with them. We didnt think aything about it until this past week i had a miscarriage. I have never experienced anything like this before. Now that we had our mind set to have another and were really excited about it we dont know what to do now. I would really like to have another one but what can i do if my husband has had a vasectomy??? Are there any options for me?? My husband said that he would do whatever he needed to it's just the money. We are military so they paid for the vasectomy and they will pay for the reversal somtimes but you have to be on a waiting list. I would just really like to have another baby. And my husband and i are going to be apart from Jan 16 until June.
I am truely sorry for your loss. I personally have had two miscarraiges. One I had known about for about 6 weeks, and the other I had learned about just 2 days before the miscarriage. I was devestated (sp?) both times. I don't have the problem about my husband having had a vasectomy, as I am a single mother. I would personally advise to either see about adopting or getting a reversal. Good luck, and again, I am extremely sorry.
If he was just as excited about it, he may be willing to have a reversal
Hi S.. I understand where you are coming from. I had a miscariage about 4 1/2 years ago. It was the hardest thing I ever had to go through. I miscarried at almost 7 months and that made it even harder. Fortunatly I had not gotton a tubal or my husband had not gotton fixed yet. So, in 2003 we brought a beautiful baby boy into the world. I did go ahead with getting my tubes tied then cause we thought we would not want children again either after having 3 already. Now today I regret it so much. I want nothing more now than to have a baby. But like you I don't know what to do. You however are on the other side somewhat cause it was your husband whom got fixed. I have heard of people getting pregnat still after the procedure he had. Just as you did already. I would talk to your doctor to see what he says. Could it be reversed on a male? I am not sure. I did just want you to know that you are not alone. I know what the loss of a child can do to you. Take care and I hope you get the answer you need sooner or later.
First let me say how sorry I am for your loss. I have had 14 miscarriages and my son passed away 8 years ago at the age of 22 months. I have been in your shoes and I thought that I should warn you about having another child until your grief has lessened (I promise it will) to have another child. The void left behind will not be filled by another child. Aside from that, adoption is always an option. Imagine the love you could offer a child left behind. Remember that God has a plan for you and although I know it is hard, this unfortunate event was part of it. Keep your head up and in the meantime, shower all of that extra love on your other three children.
Hi S.,
There are many unwanted children in our society that want and need homes. You can always adopt, or there are agencies like children and family service that let you be foster parents with the chance to adopt. God never gives you more than you can handle. and everything happens for a reason. I'm so sorry you miscarried and I pray you and your husband get what you need in your lives as far as children are concerned
First off, let me say that I am truely sorry about your miscarrage. I'll pray for you and your well being. Well my husband had a vasectomy and him and his ex-wife (now ex-wife) wanted to have a baby because she never had children, and he had his vasectomy reversed. about 6 mths later, she was pregnant. (the daughter is now 6 years old). he never got another vasectomy therefore he ended up getting me pregnant 4 mths after we got married!...now we have a beautiful baby boy.(3mths old).but it was a desicion that he made. he said it was kinda painful but the pain didn't last too long. maybe you should talk to your husband about a reversal. and try again.
He can have the vasectomy reversed. The sooner the better or his body could reject the reversal the longer you wait. I don't know how painful the inital procedure was or if your insurance company would pay for the reversal or to have another vasectomy afterwards. This you should check with your insurance company about. Good luck and I hope this helps.
J.
S., you have gotten a lot of great responses and ideas. I wanted to send my condolences for your family's loss. I'd also offer that maybe waiting until your grief has lessened a bit more will help you and your husband make the decision easier. In your heart and mind a baby was coming. Are you trying to fill that void or truly wanting another child?
I wish you all the best in your decision and send you lots hugs for your loss.
First of all i am sorry to hear that you lost a child that you didnt know you wanted till you were pregnant. that is had i know. the only advice i could give you is if he is up for it and the money is there and everything i would talk to his doctor about have it reversed and then if naturally dont work and you can always to it in a lab where they do all the concieveing for you. or you could adopt.
good luck
My husband had 2 vasectomies before he and I met. He never had a reversal and we have an 8 month old daughter together. The dr. that did his 2 vasectomies told him that apparently God wasn't done with him making babies. Try to think about having a reversal done. You might see how he feels about it and see if he thinks that it is a good idea. Please keep me posted at ____@____.com
You've gotten lots of advice about reversals. There are other options. You could foster a child who needs a home or adopt one. Contact officials in you county and see where there are the greatest areas of need. Maybe you could start there.
R.
If you really want to have another baby I would talk to your husband about having his vasectomy reversed. We just made the decision for my husband to have one done as we are expecting our third in April. I know how hard this decision can be.
Have you ever thought of fostering or adopting? It will end up costing about the same, maybe even less. A lot of companies offer adoption assistance, and wouldn't it be a great way to share love with someone who really needs it and teach your kids to look into other opportunities and how wonderful it is to help others out?
First of all, I am so sorry for your loss. I am going through something similar in that I just miscarried our 3rd child and although my husband didn't have a vasectomy, he has decided he doesn't want anymore children...and I am devastated. So my heart goes out to you.
Would your husband consider reversing his vasectomy? That is an option, and beings it was very recently done there is a good success rate with it. Please keep us updated and if you need to talk to someone, feel free to message me!
