How to Help a Resistant Toddler Take a Nap?

It sounds as though your son is moving away from his naps, which can be a short or lengthy process, depending on what's going on in his life. (Children entering preschool and kindergarten may take naps for a while, esp. if they're tired...)

If it were me, I'd invite the older one to play quietly in the living room while I put the baby to sleep in the room. Then, I'd offer a half-hour of stories and then see where he was at. If he seemed tired, I'd try for a nap on the couch, if not, I'd offer some quiet play while I took care of what I needed to do. One way to do this is to set a timer and ask the child to sit and look at books, color or use playdough--whatever they enjoy doing-- independently until the timer went off. And then, after that time goes off, immediately come back and be ready to spend time with them. That part is really important and will reinforce this pattern to them. (the child learns "I am quiet and by myself and when the timer goes ding, mama always spends time with me")-- we must be consistent.

I'd also recommend starting a timer for no longer than 15 minutes at first, and then lengthening the time as your son gets used to being "on his own" during that time. He needs to know that the timer WILL eventually go off. 15 minutes is barely a tick to us, but an incredibly long time for a 30 month old wanting mom's attention. If you are in a bind, a quiet video might work as well. I'm not big on recommending tv, but heck, we all need a break!

Good luck! Just get into a consistent routine, and with time he will be able to anticipate and expect what's going to happen around rest time.

I have 2 1/2 year old twin girls and I have the same problem as you. They have really been resistant to taking naps and they keep each other from falling asleep but they are so grumpy that I know they still need them. I have been doing quiet time everyday for an hour. They have to be on their bed reading or playing quietly. I sit with one or the other reading or resting too. It seems that every other day they will fall asleep for a nap. On the days they don't fall asleep I put them to bed early. Even though I miss being able to put them down for a nap and get other things done, this has really been working and it is good for me to take an hour of rest time each day as well.

Hi D. -

Sounds like your little guy is transitioning and trying to drop his nap. This phase pass quickly, but I know the challenge in the mean time. Generally when I've had a toddler going through that transition of dropping the nap, I've just let them stay up (espeicially if their transition is affecting other children's naps) and adjusted my expectations so that I expect that child to either take a late afternoon nap (which typically means a little later bedtime) or, if they can stay awake until after dinner, I put them down to bed a bit earlier. I expect them to be grouchy and try to have something to distract them like a favorite video or playdoh and definitely snacks. It may seem like this will never end, but the time will pass and he'll be through this phase very soon.

I have such a hard time accepting that a 2 1/2 year old is ready to give up a nap! My almost-5 year old is finally giving his up and it's sooo hard for him some days. We do the quiet time and he goes to bed early now. My almost 2 1/2 year old resists nap frequently. I have always had to put them in separate rooms. The baby naps with me (yeah, I nap as much as I can, which maybe helps) and the big boy takes his quiet time in his room with books. Sometimes it takes a half hour or more to get the baby down (I end up playing for a bit which is fun, then tell him it's sleepy time and roll over and he gives up eventually), but once he goes, it's a two hour much needed nap. The key for us is to run his butt off in the morning and then nap isn't really a problem. Good luck!!

Sounds like he is done with naps. He will be easier to handle if you just let him be done...we moved our daughters bed time up about a half hour and got rid of naps. She is so much easier to handle now. Now don't get me wrong it took a good two weeks to get into a good new routine as the first week at least she would get really tired and cranky by about 1-1.5 hours before bed. But once she got use to the change no more fights. She now has mandatory 1-2 hour quiet time. Where she chooses from a movie, play-doh, Littlest pet shop, colors... So much better. Oh and she was changed over to no naps by 2.5 and had started fighting them around 2. I didn't want it to happen but it is much easier with them gone. Not looking forward to our son getting rid of naps he is already fighting them at 22 months. Are kids also sleep a good deep 12 hours every night so I think they get plenty of sleep with that.

don't have an answer I have the same situation...wanted to see what others had to say

Your son may be growing out of his need to nap in the afternoon, even though your are not (grin). This transition time to not napping is tricky because what tends to happen is a later nap, such as if you go anywhere in the car, which tends to disrupt bed-time.
If you are desperate for him to sleep, avoid sweets as part lunch or dessert and (1)make it a rolling nap (then have self care time in the form of reading (or napping) for yourself while you all sit pulled over in the car at a park somewhere), I know, it does not get the laundry done, but everyone is refreshed (2) curl up with your son on your bed or on a couch.
What we ended up doing more and more is calling this early afternoon "quiet time," (napping optional), but other quiet activities available, such as looking at picture books, playing with lego, etc. The quietness of quiet time was reinforced with praise and dedicated un-quiet mom availability afterwards.

So sorry to hear you are having troubles with naptime. My son gave up his naps at 2 1/2 years of age and for the first month acted like he really needed them. I finally accepted that it wasn't worth the battle since you can't "make" someone go to sleep who is determined to stay awake. I tried everything to get him to nap and had read every sleep book out there since we've struggled with naps his entire life. Thus, I know how important sleep is, but I also know that you can't force someone to sleep. Both he and I were much happier people once we decided that naps were just gone. Instead of forcing a nap, I stuck to my guns in regards to our night time rituals. I never gave in to our rules in regards to going to bed and staying in bed. He had to follow them and I often put him to bed before 7 p.m. if he acted like he needed more rest. He still has days when he seems like he needs a nap to me but even if we drove around in a car, he won't fall asleep. However, we never have problems with getting him to bed at night because that's where we focused our energy instead. If he really seems tired during the day, I use quiet time (reading, watching a Thomas movie and sitting on the couch together) to let him relax. I don't think there's anything you can do to force a toddler to sleep who really has reached the age of giving up a nap. The child will seem like they aren't ready to give up the nap for the first month or two while they re-adjust themselves. Rather than beat yourself up trying to get him to sleep, you can help him by figuring out ways to get him to function without a nap. My son goes to bed at 7 without a fuss and starts his day at 5, as happy as can be. Somedays, however, when he plays really hard, we shift his beadtime to 6:30 (somedays it's even earlier since he gets up so early and is a very active child). I realize the nap is probably very important to you when you have another child in the house. You'll need to decide how much it is worth the battle though if he's determined to be done with the nap.

I have twins that are now 4 but they started doing the same thing at 2 1/2. One still needed a nap and the other seemed like she needed it but just wouldn't sleep. I took the one who was not napping and put her on my bed for a "quiet time." I gave her books and she would either listen to books on cd or music. The rest really seemed to help her and then we would put her to bed at 6:30pm. This transition took about 3 or 4 months and then she started going to bed later again. She is now four and still does the quiet time for 1 1/2 hours each day.

We just had our second a couple of days ago - and the two will share a room...curious to see the responses you get! Can one nap in another room, without it causing problems for bedtime? Also, have you tried to encourage a quiet time - with the expectation that he not get up until a certain time (maybe set a timer)? My son went through a short phase (one week thankfully) when he resisted and I gave him a pile of books and turned on his music - he was told that he couldn't get out of bed until the music (which was on repeat) ended...every day, he read one book and fell asleep with it propped in his hands...and slept for 3 hours!

Unfortunately, he may really be growing out of naptime - it does or can happen at that age!

Try skipping the nap and moving his bedtime up a half hour. It will take a few days, but I'm guessing he will adjust and be fine. My kids both gave up naps at age 2. I know you don't want to have him not nap, but your 1 year old needs it more. You could also try having him nap somewhere else so he doesn't disturb his sister. I just know from my own experience that when they start to fight the nap it usually means they are ready to give it up. You can continue to fight them or give in. My kids both fall asleep fast at night and sleep great through the night. It does take some time for adjusting to being awake all day, but eventually he will be fine. Good Luck!

Napping is so tough at this age! Does your son fall asleep in the car? When my son was between about 2 and 2 1/2 we drove around a little bit each day to allow him to fall asleep. Often I would plan to be out of the house in the morning so he would fall asleep on the way home. After he'd been asleep about 10 minutes I could safely transfer him to his bed. After we stopped driving (when gas prices peaked) it became a huge battle, so I just stopped fighting. It was a relief to everybody when we didn't have that stress. He still will fall asleep in the car once in a while, but I just consider that a nice little bonus. Now, my son is 3 and hasn't regularly napped in about 2 months. The first few weeks were really hard because he was a bear by about 4:30 most days. We do start his bedtime rituals around 5:30 most evenings, and he's usually asleep before 6:30. It makes evening activities more or less impossible, but my family is happier, and that's what matters. Good luck!

Your son and daughter are about the same ages mine were when we had a similar problem. My 2-1/2 yo daughter started refusing naps, and in the process waking her 1 yo brother who I would put down first in their shared room. I ended up throwing my hands up in the air and letting her stay out in the living room with me for quiet play while brother napped in their room. The 2-1/2 yo was super grumpy and would end up trying to take late afternoon naps (which I thwarted whenever possible) and being put to bed early and we were all generally pretty unhappy with the arrangement. It lasted less than two weeks before she started willingly and happily napping on the couch in the living room while her brother sleeps in his crib. I think, in our case, she was just asserting herself as a "big kid", differentiating herself from her "baby" brother. Two years later they still happily share a room at night and she still takes a super nap almost every day on the couch while the little guy sleeps in their room. For what it's worth...