Getting My Son to Sleep in His Own Bed

Updated on January 15, 2008
M.C. asks from Beloit, WI
6 answers

Ok, I have been working on this problem for about 1 1/2 yrs. My 4 1/2 yr old son sneaks into my bed EVERYnight to sleep. We have tried to do a calander with a suprise at the end and it didn't work. We have put up a babygate and explained to him he was not to cross over that at night and stay in his bed, that didn't work, we have even turned on HIS Tv in his room and told him he could watch a movie before bed and that didn't work! I am out of IDEAS, does anyone have any for me???

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M.B.

answers from Benton Harbor on

Hi,
Have you ever tried the extra tall baby gates? I know Target carries them. Whatever you decide to do, just be consistant and eventually he will catch on. Good luck and let us know what happens:-)

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J.O.

answers from Boise on

Just put a pallet/sleeping bag on your floor for him and tell him it is the only place he can sleep in your room, doing it this way makes him feel welcome without making him feel abadonded(sp), but always start him out in his own room so that way over time he will just start to sleep in his own bed, he will in time just stay in his own room, but know that if he gets scared or sick he can feel safe close to guys. No 15 year old still sleeps with there parents.

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T.O.

answers from Grand Rapids on

I've had the same problem with my 3 1/2 year old son. We got him a "Big Boy BEd" and he still wouldn't sleep in it. What we did was let him have sleep overs. His older sister will sleep on the top bunk on non-school nights and we kept the hallway light on. Now every night we tuck them both in at the same time. I count down to bedtime with reminders such as 10 minutes till bed all the way till I say two minutes, lets go potty. That so far seems to be working for us. We have a routine now and we praise him every morning when he comes in to snuggle around 7 with what a big boy your are!

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S.H.

answers from Boise on

first, I'd take the tv "out" of his room - my sister did this and her son started watching it all night long - backfire!
have you tried putting a cd player in his room? we put one close enough for my son to push play with classical - sleepy time music - that he can hit play again if he wakes up - it also has a night light on it, so it's illuminated. we also got him a special stuffed dog to sleep with. good luck - I think just being consistent and getting into a bedtime routine; tubby, pj's, read together, prayers, lights out. . . and then just keep reinforcing it if he gets up, eventually it will just "click" that he's supposed to "stay" in his bed.
:)

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J.R.

answers from Salt Lake City on

The decision to sleep with your children (or not to) is very personal and parents need to choose what is best for them and their kids. When our kids were born, my husband and I chose to sleep with our kids (and we're not even new age hippies).

Recently both children proudly announced a "move out" date without our prompting. Teddy was 7 when he started sleeping in his own bed (and hasn't returned once) and Forrest has told us he too will sleep in his own bed after his 7th birthday (a few months away). I know 7 years sounds like a long time but, I figure once they move out of your bed, they never come back. So, I cherish every night.

Sounds like your son really enjoys being close to you. You might try just letting him sleep with you. Of course this might take some getting used to (sometimes it is just getting over the social stigmas), but if you don't mind having him in your room for a few years...I say go for it. Then he can decide when he feels confident enough to sleep on his own.

Best of Luck!

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K.D.

answers from Salt Lake City on

I don't have this problem, but had a friend who did. She took the advice from an article in a parenting magazine. The advice was to return them to their room and tell them that they need to stay in their bed. The next time do the same, and the next time and every time after that return them without any explanation. She said it took about 2 - 2.5 weeks (and many sleepless nights of returning her son to his bed countless times) but he finally gave up and just started staying in his room.

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