Friends - Albertville,AL

Updated on July 20, 2010
K.R. asks from Albertville, AL
12 answers

Why would someone that you would have done anything for turn on you? I have a "friend" that I truly loved and absolutely loved being around. She made me laugh and made me feel good about myself and we always built each other up. A couple of weeks ago, some truth came to light and found out this person was not my friend. You know how it goes......the "behind the back" stuff. I thought we were really becoming the best of friends but for some reason she thought she had something to gain by lying and going to other people trying to turn others against me. Didn't work though. I loved this person like a sister. She must really think that she's unlovable to think she has to be such a snake to get everyone's approval. Even at the cost of a really good friend. I've learned a hard lesson. By the way.....for some reason...she thinks I'm the one that stabbed her in the back. I wished she would tell me what I did. She hasn't...she's never been up front with me. That tells me something. A lie she told was brought to light to me by a "higher up".. What does that say?

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S.B.

answers from Gainesville on

I have the same problem. Thats why now I have no friends, not even a shoppin buddy. :-( Lonely yet rewarding :-)

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M.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Maybe she wanted you all to herself. Does she seem possessive of you? I haven't been in this situation but my friend has. Her best friend attempted to turn everyone against her so she would be her ONLY friend. Strange, but true.

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C.T.

answers from Detroit on

she was a low down dirty dog! but don't let what she did turn you against making new friends. there are still good people in the world.

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B.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

Its really hard to get ahead if you spend all your time trying to get even.

Sit down and have a heart to heart with her. If it works, great, if not, then go on without her.

Good luck to you and yours.

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P.W.

answers from San Francisco on

Sounds like a miscommunication. Talk to her.

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D.F.

answers from Boston on

I feel your pain. My best friend since birth has done this to me. She was just like a sister for 47 years. I finally learned that I was the only one in this friendship. I was heartbroken. She has not once called to find out why I dropped her like a hot potato. This tells me she knows why and is spineless. I have moved on and have made two more great friends. I really never realized what it was like to have the friendship go both ways. It took me a while but its worth having girl friends that you can trust and have fun with. So move on and find someone worthy of your friendship.

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A.N.

answers from Los Angeles on

I am a very forward person and if she isn't going to come to you, why don't you confront her and let her know how upset and hurt you are? Maybe she has never had a really good friend and doesn't realize what she is giving up. I know it doesn't really matter, but how old are you guys? This sounds like high school stuff and not something that adults would engage in. Again, be upfront and call her out on it, and see if you at least get some answers even if you guys don't end up being friends again.

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P.O.

answers from Jacksonville on

Learn your lesson and move on!

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E.C.

answers from Fayetteville on

I dont know what was said by her but thats too bad i had a friend like that once...I guess you never really know a person truly. The best thing to do is to not associate yourself with her anymore people like that never change.

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L.A.

answers from Minneapolis on

It makes me feel better to read your post and others responses. I recently went through the same thing. I figured out she was a user and it wasnt much of a friendship. She even told a neighbor a HUGE lie to try an get us in a fight. My neighbor doesnt talk to me much anymore. Even though letting it go has been very hard (almost like a grieving process) I have realized that I am such a better person without her (and my neighbor) in my life. Sounds like a huge insecurity issue on their parts. For somebody to feel like they need to go tell somebody else something about you is telling me they dont have much respect for you or themselves.
I have unfortunatly lost a lot of faith and trust in people. I have had a very hard time making friends since moving here. I just am focusing on making positive changes in my life. I am always a person who wants to take care of everybody else and help as much as I can. I have learned I need to take care of me though.

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J.L.

answers from San Diego on

I would have a non confritational talk with her, she may be going through something herself, not that what she did was excusable, but all things are forgiveable. J.

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S.R.

answers from McAllen on

You know, that happened to me (only in a professional environment) so, I think that the best thing for you is not to even think about it, if she hasnt been up front with you, who were a friend... that speak honesty, does it? specially if she has been spreading lies about you. I am sure you didnt do anything to her, she just feels embarrased that she was caught in the lie and wants to blame it on you. Like I said dont even think about it, it will only make you feel bad about it. Im sure you will find a best friend, that really cares about you, you deserve it.

Hope you feel better, I'm sorry about it. Good Luck.

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