Do You Call Your Child Names?

Updated on July 18, 2013
C.O. asks from Reston, VA
62 answers

There was a question in a group I am in on Facebook. The question came up - do you call your children names? There are MEN and WOMEN in this group...total spectrum on background, etc.

I said - yes, I do...Pickle and Sunshine...

Someone then said - that's wrong. You are demeaning your child.
I disagreed and went about my merry way...went back later and the whole post had devolved...from people calling their kids "animal" names - i.e. Monkey, Tiger, Boo-Bear, Snuggle Bear, etc. and how it was wrong on SSSOOO many levels.

I might call my youngest son a mokey - especially when he is hanging from bars and acting like a monkey. How is that wrong? I'm not telling him he IS a monkey - I'm telling him he is ACTING like a monkey. Key word difference for me.

Apparently a few people think that even pet names are wrong...

So do you call your kids names?

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So What Happened?

Aileen! But Dad!! I'm Jesus Christ!! LOL!!

Oh yeah - it devolved so much - one of the guys name is "graham" his dad used to call him his little cracker...oh my WORD!!

What's the problem? I don't know. This is the words of one poster "I believe that words have power and that power when spoken over our child, even if it's joke or even if they don't hear it, releases something into the atmosphere. I just wanted to know."

Featured Answers

J.W.

answers from St. Louis on

Seriously Donna? One name is one dimensional, you give it to them at birth and it should not define the child. Nick names are multi dimensional because they are born of the child's real personality! If you honor a name you are not honoring the human with the name, you are honoring the human that gave it to them. Kind of sad that you don't see that. :(

My kids have so many nicknames because they change as their personality changes. Ya know, honor the person and their amazing personality. :)

10 moms found this helpful

S.G.

answers from Grand Forks on

To me "calling names" is a derogatory thing, like "jerk" or "butthead". I would not call my kids "jerk" although I might tell them "don't be a jerk". Using "pet names" like "honey" or "dear" is a sign of affection, and I use them with my kids and my husband. Nicknames are also a sign of affection, and I don't see how they are demeaning, as long as the child likes it. Using pet names can be demeaning when used in a condescending manner.

7 moms found this helpful
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B.H.

answers from Dallas on

my daughter is "Peanut" and has been since she was born. She will be Peanut when she's 50.

When my husband or I use her actual name, she thinks she's in trouble.

7 moms found this helpful

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A.P.

answers from Washington DC on

I was 13 before I realized my name wasn't Godamit

12 moms found this helpful

S.T.

answers from Washington DC on

snork!
my kids, my dh, and half my friends. even our animals hardly ever get called their real names!
some people are just a wee bit too uptight.
:) khairete
S.

10 moms found this helpful
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J.C.

answers from New York on

It's called a term of endearment. How could that be wrong?

9 moms found this helpful
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E.E.

answers from Denver on

Oh no! I broke my kids! ;)

8 moms found this helpful

J.S.

answers from Hartford on

People think nicknames are "wrong?" What the huh?

8 moms found this helpful
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J.K.

answers from Kansas City on

yes I call my kids names - Doodles and Air Bear. Oops I guess one of them is an animal name. He's going to be maimed for life. Don't you hate it when people have to try to be so CORRECT all the time? I bet your kids love it when they hear you call them Pickle and Sunshine and will cherish it forever.

8 moms found this helpful

X.O.

answers from Chicago on

As long as you're not calling your kid derogatory names like, crybaby, sissy, pansy, brat, pain in the neck, etc., calling them names is endearing.

My dad called me "face" ever since I was a baby, and he still does because he and my mom just loved my little face.

We call my kids "Habibi" which is Arabic for "my love."

8 moms found this helpful

T.R.

answers from Milwaukee on

A friend of mine on FB has 2 kids, preteen, but older than 7. The family is big fans of SF & Fantasy, & do costuming.

She calls them Spawn 1 & Spawn 2. They love it! (not even sure, it may have been their idea in the first place).

They have FB accouts (prior a shared account) & have fun changing the name to be some version of what kind of Spawn they are. It's a hoot.

All in all, I think if the name is not outwardly derrogatory, or said in a maliciously mean manner, & the kids enjoy it, then DO IT!

T.

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M.M.

answers from Dallas on

Oh pay no mind to people with those views - they aren't worth your time really. Those are the same parents that won't tell their kids (and probably their pets too) 'no' b/c that is a negative word and sends a negative feeling.

My word, some parents have just lost all common sense and have gone off the deep end!

Interesting post :)

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S.F.

answers from Fargo on

We love sweet pet names in our house! How on earth could someone think that it's wrong?

Queenofthecastle, your name for your kids is so precious. Reading your post made me smile!

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M.P.

answers from Raleigh on

I do! And my kids call each other their pet names as well. I don't see the big deal. People get so uptight over the silliest things!

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C.N.

answers from Baton Rouge on

I called my daughter "Monkey," "Pumpkin," and "Darlin."
She loved clothes with monkey designs on them.
One day she wanted her dad to play house with her. She told him "I'll be the mommy and you be the darlin."
Another time wheen she was about five, she woke up early and came stumbling into the kitchen rubbing her eyes. I was making coffee, heard her come in the room, turned to her and said, "My, you're up early." She burst into tears. When I asked her what was wrong, she said, "You never call me Pum-a-kin anymore!"

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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

I do not call her demeaning names. I call her things that show affection, same as calling my DH "Love" or "Sweetheart." My DD is not demeaned when I call her my Sweet Pea or Snuggle Bug.

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J.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

I call my girls, baby doll, Miss Mxxx, doll baby, love bug, sweetie pie. In the morning if I wake them up I will say "good morning sunshine!"
Some people are nuts.

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R.M.

answers from San Francisco on

I think pet names are sweet. Precious, baby, honey, lovebug, sweetpea -- I used those.

"Spawn 1 and 2" is hilarious. Yes, I think anything said with love is fine.

6 moms found this helpful

J.B.

answers from Houston on

Sure I do. What fun would it be using their birth name all the time. No different than calling your spouse a pet name and if you're against that, what a joy your marriage must be (not YOU but in general ;-) )
When they're taking too long to get ready "come on grandma"
When they're hyper "chill out lunatic"
I could go on for days…. but then again… you know me

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T.H.

answers from Kansas City on

Stop associating with weirdos cuz those peeps are crazy! ;)

I do agree that if you call them a name in a derogatory way then yes, that is horrible. Even if it is a sweet name and you use it in a mean way, then, yes, terrible. Like "baby". You could say oh my sweet baby I love you so much=great...or...stop acting like a baby a quit you're crying=no, no!

But it seems most of us on this post all use some sort of name or series of names on our kids, which is sweet, common and comfortable.

And, Fuzzy...that was too stinking cute about your daughter and not calling her Pum-a-kin! :)

6 moms found this helpful

M.J.

answers from Milwaukee on

I love calling my kids scallywags. I also make up silly songs with their names and words that rhyme all the time.

I think people that take issue with using fun names for your kids have a screw loose.

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M.P.

answers from San Francisco on

We used to call my oldest puddin' head and punkin when she was little. Just Honey now.

Youngest gets called sweet pea and lovey dove.

I like to think of them as terms of endearment. Your FB group needs to lighten up!!

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C.M.

answers from Chicago on

I call my daughter "Cupcake" because she's sweet and loves cupcakes! She LOVES it! She likes it when I buy her anything with a picture of a cupcake on it.

I would not call her a demeaning name. Sometimes when she's being silly I will call her "Silly Puss" but that's about it!

I did have to have a talk with her about giving her friends nicknames though. She likes to give other people nicknames, but they don't always appreciate it. I told her that a nickname is something that BOTH parties have to agree on.

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P.M.

answers from Portland on

I had dozens of pet names for my daughter – they would change over time. They were all affectionate. I never once called her a name that would be construed as insulting or belittling. That was very important to me, having been raised otherwise.

But this question reminds me of a story out of my own childhood. My youngest sister was 8 years behind me, and we were nearly inseparable. One day when she was around 4, she asked to come with me to a friend's house. I told her she could if she would behave. She immedidately answered: OK, I'm "Have!"

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M.D.

answers from Washington DC on

I rarely call my kids by their names.

My daughter is baby doll, lady bug, sweetie, lady, and Bear.

My middle son is Cam, Tank, Roni, Bud.

The baby is 99% of the time called Scooter, otherwise it's Keat or baby boy.

I call all of them "baby." I even called out to my youngest on his flag football championship game and yelled "Go get 'em, baby!" The coach told me to enjoy it, because he won't allow it much longer...I told him until they tell me to stop, I'll do it. I do it at the middle son's baseball games and my daughter's dance competitions. They don't mind their pet names at all...they actually like them.

I don't see how it's wrong at all.

5 moms found this helpful

K.B.

answers from Salt Lake City on

Well, first of all, people in general...need to "Lighten Up!" Like Mommyof1 said, it's called a term of endearment. If you are swearing at them or calling them something belligerent, that is NOT good but like you, I think of nicknames or names we make up for them due to an interest etc. I call my daughter Liv, Livvy or Livers and my son Bubba., my older son, Jere or Jere Bear. My kids actual names are Olivia, Christian and Jeremy. I don't use these names all the time but usually in quick conversations or tender moments.

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S.B.

answers from Houston on

Well then my kids are so messed up!!!

My daughter is "love, doll, sweet pea, shan tan".
My son is "chaseman, sweet pea, doll, little man, goober". =)

Most of the names have a reason, Chaseman was because he LOVED batman but would run down the hall yelling "chaseman". So, yeah it stuck. Same with little man, which is funny because he is 20 and is 6'1!

My parents call me Lucy Jane. I don't know why! Now its just LJ. Oh, my dad calls me Baby Girl. =)

Love Bill Cosby!!! lol

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M.C.

answers from Chattanooga on

My DD has plenty of nicknames.

Sweet pea, pumpkin, doll face, monkey, boogie, love bug, snooker loo...

I think the intention behind the names is what is important. Growing up, (heck, even as adults. lol) my grandma called the grandchildren she was closer to "brats"... Usually something that is demeaning, but the WAY she said it was full of love. We never once thought it was a bad thing, or felt demeaned in the least. Actually, when we did something and got called a brat by her it made is feel happy and extra loved. :)

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J.B.

answers from Boston on

LOL all the time! When my 9 year old was a toddler he thought his older brother (who was then 7 or 8) was named "Hey!" It took me a while to figure out that when he said "Where hey?" or "Hello hey" or "Bye-bye hey" or "Hey school?" he was talking about his brother. So we jokingly call him "Hey" every now and again. He also called his older sister "lala," (her name is two syllables and ends in "la") so we call her that sometimes too.

My oldest son is most often called Twig, Cha-cha or Dopey (in a loving way). Daughter is usually LaLa (explained above) or Punk, short for Punkin (Pumpkin).

My two younger boys are Meatball 1 and Meatball 2, Thing 1 and Thing 2, or Acorn 1 and Acorn 2.

When warranted, they're called meathead or knucklehead. Then of course there's "are you stupid? Why would you do that?" to which the normal response is "no I'm [insert name here] - stupid is that one" (pointing to whatever brother is in the vicinity.

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P.G.

answers from Dallas on

Terms of affection are fine - jeez, some people are way over the top.

Now, if a parent calls their kid stupid, etc., THAT I have a problem with! :)

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S.H.

answers from Richmond on

I absolutely call my son many different names - all terms of endearment and he knows it! I call him Andy Bear b/c he used to watch the Bernstein Bears and he wanted to know which bear he is since I am Mama Bear, his father is Papa Bear, his brother is Brother Bear - well he's not Sister Bear so I told him he is "Andy Bear" and it stuck. I also call him "Pie" b/c I called him Sugar Pie and Sweetie Pie when he was a baby. Once when I was fussing at him, he said "But Mama I your Pie" as in I couldn't fuss b/c he was my sweetie/sugar pie. It was so cute (he was just talking so his little sweet voice...melts my heart just to think about it) so I call him "Pie." Those are the main ones but I also call him things randomly - "Mama's nuggle nuggle (when we are snuggling), Sweetness, Pumpkin, Baby Boy..." All terms of endearment - all meant to show that we have a closeness, a history. I view it the same way as I view calling my husband, "Honey, Sweetie, Dear, etc." My dear departed mother used to call me "Squirt" - it was her special nickname for me and when she used it I knew what it meant - that I was special, that we had something just between us, that she loved me. I would give anything to hear her call me that 1 more time - sure doesn't seem like it "damaged" me or I took offense! People need to lighten up!

Oh how I could forget - I have called him "Sugar Booger" pretty much since birth! He's sweet like sugar but, when he was a baby he was always vomiting or had a boogie nose so sweet but gross at the same time. He laughs when I call him silly names. He laughs when I call the dog "Goober or Wiggle butt" and the cat "Meow Meow or Baby Kitty." Everyone has several nicknames, all said with love, in our house!

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K.I.

answers from Los Angeles on

Some people are so strange! I wouldn't waste anymore of your time being concerned about what that 'group' said...our 'group' here seems to think its fine!

We have tons of per names for our kiddos!

Oldest:
Boo-Bear, Bear, Son & K.

Middle Child:
W, Wylie-Coyote, Wylie-Wyatt, Son & *The Mouth.
*We call him Mouth b/c he is SO loud & b/c he eats a TON!

Youngest Child & only Girl:
Bean, Bean-E-Licious, Sis, Love, G, Gigi & Pretty Girl!

5 moms found this helpful

C.C.

answers from San Francisco on

Oh, yes. I have lots of pet names for my kiddos: Pumpkin, Cupcake, Busy Bee, Ding-Dong... when I picked my little one up from summer camp, she hugged me and said, "Call me my name, mommy." Confused, I said her actual name. She said, "No, mommy, call me Bee!" She had missed having someone call her by her nickname - to her, that only happens at home, so it made her feel happy to hear it.

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H.W.

answers from Portland on

Demeaning? Wow... someone had a messed-up childhood. ha!

I call Kiddo names all the time, usually Pumpkin, or his family nickname (Keen, a derivative of his name). Sometimes when he's taking forever to get out of the car, we might say Hurry up there Mr Molasses or C'mon, Pokey Malokey... but we all sort of tease each other in our family. He comes up with some pretty funny rhyming names for us, too. And if he ever said "I don't like that", we *would* stop.

It's called having a little fun. Maybe 'demeaning your child' should try that sometime.

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V.K.

answers from Minneapolis on

I call Oliver monkey. Sometimes I call him fritz (Not sure how that got started).

Hubby calls him Turkey... I have no idea why. Lol

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J.F.

answers from Las Vegas on

Wow WW!

I think you might need a new FB circle! To tell you you're wrong for calling your children the sweet names you have for them is just nutty IMHO.
Maybe these folks have too much time on their hands if they get that worked up over something like this.

Anyway, to answer your question, yes, we do have pet names for the kids---mostly things like "Sweetie", which I use with all the kids. My husband calls the two youngest boys, 8 and 19, "Champ." I call the youngest "Peanut" because that is what he looked like in the first ultrasound I saw of him. Ironically, he was allergic to peanuts for most of his very early years, but I still called him peanut and still do!

Seriously, I cannot see the problem with sweet terms of endearment!

ETA: Momentarily forgot about "Babycakes, Sunshine, Turkey, Little Love" and sure as I hit post, I'll think of others!

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C.O.

answers from Minneapolis on

LOL what would someone think what I call my daughter "monkey butt". Actually we call each other things. Sometimes she'll call me "pickle brain", it's just a silly thing we do to see what the most ridiculous name we can come up with is. I also call my son "stinker noodle". I don't mean it as a bad thing just a little nickname. We even have names for our pets. My dog got named "Panini" and also "flea bag" and my cat is "lazy butt" their actual names are Apollo & Ares.

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B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

Yep, our son gets called lot's of cute endearment names.
But privately - we don't go shouting them across the street.

One of his taekwondo instructors has the nickname Pookie - and it is/was so public he even had it printed on his band jersey in high school (he played snare drum before he graduated last year).
When he passed his Master Instructor exam, he earned the title Master.
Officially he's Master <same last name as his Dad who's also a Master>.
But I can't resist calling him Master Pookie sometimes.
The kid has (he's like 20 right now) got a great attitude and is liked by everyone.
There's a big difference between nick names of endearment and demeaning degrading nick names and if some of those people in your other group don't understand this I'm not sure anyone can explain it to them.
They are just sort of blind in that area.

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O.H.

answers from Phoenix on

I call my son "cracky-lacky-ding-dong" and I have no idea why but always have. I call my daughter "Ams (her name shortened), Amee, or Lovie. My ex calls our son "Bug or Buggy" since he was a baby. I don't know any parent who doesn't have some kind of cute name they call their kids. My husband and I have "pet" names for each other too, but I won't share those. lol

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J.G.

answers from Chicago on

I called them thing one and thing two. Oldest is Cookie Monster, boy is little buddy.

Words do create, but life s too short to not have some fun.

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☼.S.

answers from San Diego on

Of course! My standby is boogie, but I'll deviate into all forms of that: boog, boogster, etc.. Nothing wrong with cute pet names!

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J.B.

answers from Houston on

Oh yes! All kinds :). Snuggle bear, Joyball, Poogs, Poogie Bear, Moochie Moos, Babezoid, on and on! It gets pretty weird, like when I take my 3 yr old potty I tell him 'do your thing chicken wing!' He giggles, don't really think I am scarring him for life! I say you are normal!

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M.L.

answers from Colorado Springs on

Pet names are one thing; teasing names are another. The adult will know the difference, but the child needs to know, too! "Nope, you can't call me Pickle. My grandpa calls me Pickle because he loves me, but he's the only one who can call me that."

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E.S.

answers from New York on

Ah, please don't let FB groups get to you like this.

But yes, as others have stated, "terms of endearment," "pet names," etc. are all part of parenthood. I think I call my daughter "cookie" more than her actual name.

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S.T.

answers from Houston on

My daughter is sweet petite, my son is sweetheart. Pretty lame, but I rarely call them by their names!

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H.G.

answers from Lancaster on

DD is 13 and I call her many different names - and rarely by her given name. Boo-boo, munchski, baby, etc. Perhaps the people on your Facebook group should look up "terms of endearment". In my opinion, calling your child by an affectionate term is no different than calling your spouse sweetie, baby, bunny, etc. Really, do these people think it will psychologically damage kids?

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M.O.

answers from New York on

You mean pet names -- affectionate nicknames, right?

Oh good Lord, who doesn't do that? And what a ridiculous thing for people to snip at each other about.

My son is Boo, Mr. Boo, and when I'm feeling formal-silly, Good Sir Honorable Boo. And don't ask me why Boo either, it just happened.

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C.M.

answers from Washington DC on

I call Kailey "Boo" like from monsters inc. When she was little I did her hair in 2 pigtails and she had those super cute chubby cheeks. She looked JUST like Boo. That name stuck and I still call her that.

I call Jonathan my little monkey because he is just silly. I also call him buddy and bug. Nothing wrong with it. If my kids ever had a problem with it then I would stop.

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K.P.

answers from Seattle on

When I saw the title I thought you were going to be referring to mean name calling. But, yes, I call my kiddo different nicknames. I call him Monkey, Bubba, sweetie, etc etc. I see nothing wrong with it, we ALL have them! Tell me none of those people go by something other than their name. Whatever!

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H.H.

answers from Washington DC on

Wow! I never even thought about the nicknames I give my children as "one dimensional" or "demeaning." My older son has so many nicknames or as I prefer to call terms of endearment that I can't recall all of them. His nickname since he was born has been Bubba or Bubs. He will answer to that name as well as his given name. There are times I'll call him silly names and he'll laugh. None of the names I give him are derogatory in any way and they're said with love not when I'm upset with him. If anything, his given name is used more readily when I'm upset with him, as in his full given name. So I guess he'll associate when I call him by his name that he's in trouble. Now that I think about it, isn't Mommy and Daddy a nickname? it's not my given name and how do you explain that to your kids when they realize it's not your "real" name. Something to think about..... I think you're friends need to lighten up and find real things to worry about.

LOL Celeste, I call my son Monkey butt too and it makes him laugh.

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L.P.

answers from Boca Raton on

one of mine is 'the space cadet' (the name should say it all), and the other one is my OCD kid.
those are their funny names. oh and dad's nickname from kids is 'youtube guy' and mom's is 'eat now. eat now.'
they are descriptive names. no one is offended and explains us to a tee.
i don't know if you consider out names pet names but hey i will take it. i disagree with the notion that calling kids names is wrong. of course if you are calling them dumass and jackass hahah i can understand but otherwise no. plus, it's not a glass world we live in. kids will get called names by their peers. should we sue everyone who will end up calling them names?

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M.L.

answers from Cleveland on

hmmm, i was with you all till someone threw a Booger into the sweetie pies and pumpkins.

Booger to me is not a cute pet name.

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J.H.

answers from New York on

Oh my - makes me roll my eyes that people would flip out about that. My kids have so many nicknames I realized it would be too hard to list them all. Some are animals, some are vegetables, and many are simply made up words (Shmook - I couldn't even tell you what that one evolved from!).

I just have to try to catch myself before I yell out at my daughter while she plays softball "Way to go, Pumpkin!" Eleven-year-olds don't generally like that too much :)

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M.H.

answers from Chicago on

I do.. My son, is Turkey or buddy. My daughter is Peanut or Peanut Pie.. I apparently call my son Buddy to often- When I ask my 2 year old about her brother she will only call him buddy.. even if I say.. hey say ----- she still says Buddy. Oh well.

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A.M.

answers from Phoenix on

I call all of my kids "George." Obviously they are not all named George, but it was a line from a movie they used to watch when they were little. They like it!

I refer to my son as "buddy" and "son" often. Also, when they are being brats I let them know they are being brats. Typically I will say something like "You're being a real brat." or even "You're a BRAT!" GASP!! I don't care what other people think of that. I say it like it is!

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S.S.

answers from Chicago on

I hae always called my kids funny names. My youngest son has been called bean for as long as I can remember his name is sam. my oldest son was drooby his name is andrew and my middle son is named joe but we called him feena. not sure why lol. the kids I nanny for the little boy is named cameron but I call him magoo or sometimes will say ready fred. he is not offended or scarred by either one. now if I was saying bad words I cam imagine that would scar but if you call you little one princess or kitten I don't think that is a terrible thing. just like my calling my son bean sometimes is and was not a problem. people need to get a life and worry about the real things and stop sweating the small stuff.

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M.S.

answers from Washington DC on

I would rather live in a home with nicknames than a stuffy, serious "given name only" home any day! My entire family --siblings included--have so many silly, fun, nicknames I couldn't begin to count them!

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J.C.

answers from Anchorage on

I don't see anything wrong with pet names. I have called my kids monkey, pumpkin butt, and even baby doll (until my then 6 year old son asked me to stop since baby doll was a baby name, lol). They are just fine and did not suffer any damage from it. Now when my youngest, Rayne, finally sees the movie Rain Man he may be a little mad, but I am sure he will get over it ;)

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K.S.

answers from Hartford on

I call my oldest Fred,my middle George and the one in my belly,baby lol

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J.D.

answers from Cincinnati on

Yes but its just all in fun. You aren't demeaning your child unless you call them names out of anger then that is probably wrong. I call my son Bearf. Beppy, Boo Bear, Sweet Heart and many many others.

When my sister was little, we all called her EEB and when people would ask what her name was, she would say EEB.

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R.A.

answers from Boston on

My son has always had the nickname of Pooks, since he was born..Stinky Pooks, when he misbehaves. Nicknames are endearing, and live forever. A name is just a name, but a nickname is soo much more! haha..

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D.S.

answers from Norfolk on

Hi, W.:

Why name your child at birth? When a child is born, the name is his identity. Does a parent want to have a child think of himself as one dimensional? A person's name is 3 dimensional: body, mind and spirit.

A pickle is a vegetable to be eaten.
A human being is to be honored.

Good luck.
D.

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