Darling Daughter HATES to Have Her Hair Brushed

In order to comb both my daughter when she was young, and now my granddaughter's hair I would simply stand them in front of the mirror so that they could see exactly what I was doing. When I get to a tangled hair area, I make silly faces as I try to pull the comb or brush through. Because the child is watching me, they start to laugh instead of crying because I am silly.

I have a 5 year old little girl with wild and crazy hair too and it helps to use adult shampoo and conditioner. the kid stuff just does not work on thick unruly hair. I also kept her hair shoulder length with long layers which cut down on the tangles. leave in conditioner really helps and lots and lots of detangler spray. I hope that helps you. Good luck. Just wait until she finds her closet and her clothes, agggghhh!

My DD was the same way still is sometimes and she is three, every morning I use a spray detangler in her hair before I brush it, it helps remove the snarls and smells great.

I was your daughter. Long, thick, very curly hair. I hated to have it brushed, too, because it hurts so bad when its knotty! Please try to be understanding that it does truly hurt, and not whack her in the back of the head with the brush, like my Mom did when I whined about it!

Still to this day I can't really brush through my hair when it is dry. My advice is a wide-toothed comb, detangling spray or leave-in conditioner, and comb after bath, when it is still wet. It makes it so much easier for the comb to slide through and slip out the knots. (My scalp is hurting just remembering that little bit of childhood)

Also, if you have to brush dry hair, gather it into a ponytail in your hand, about an inch from the scalp, and hold firmly while you bruch the ends. Holding the hair stops the knots from yanking at the roots of her hair, which is what hurts so badly.

This is a great time for distraction. Tell a story, or time hair-combing during a favorite cartoon, so she's less focused on what you are doing.

My 2 1/2 year old son also HATES this. When we were at the Children's Institute for feeding problems, they told me that they thought he had sensory integration issues. (sounds like a big deal but in our case not - he doesn't like his hair brushed and he doesn't like to be barefoot) Basically it is like the difference between if someone touches you lightly with a feather it tickles; and if someone puts their hand on you it doesn't. Some kids can't stand the "gentler" touches. They taught me a great trick that nearly always works. I got a hospital brush (they have them at Babies R Us) and "brush" parts of his body. (Nothing over an organ) I just brush his arms, hands and legs. You use quick medium pressure and you do the same amounts of brushes on each part. This desensitizes him for a short while, and it is then ok to brush his hair.

Hi COurney, I find if you make up a song about how pretty they are, or play "beauty shop" and let her look at a magazine and talk about "so, have you read any good books lately???" Another idea is to let her watch tv or a movie, spray her hair with a little water or johnson's and johnson's detangler and start at the bottom and work your way up to the root. Also, a great product to try is Paul Mitchell the CREAM. My daughter is biracial and has C R A Z Y hair and all the above tricks have worked. She is almost 6 and usually sits still. It's a phase, if she wants long pretty hair, she will learn to let you care for it.
Good luck!
J.

You may have tried someof these ideas, but here is what I do.

First, I let her pick out some fun detangler and cute ponytail holders from the store. I try different types of brushes too. Some are really hard to use and other pretty easy. It really makes a differnce though.

I usually start with fresh washed hair and a seperate conditioner (not shampoo and conditioner in one. Towel dry. I turn on a favorite dvd or cartoon and have her watch TV while I am combing. I spray a lot of detangler on her hair and then start to brush I go slow and easy. I start at the bottom and work my way up in small sections. Once it is all combed though, I put it up in the holder. If she starts to cry, i tell her i am sorry and that i will be more careful, then i kiss her head. That seems to help her stop faster than if I just tell her to stop crying.

If she is being really stubborn and fusses a lot, i will bribe her with something relatively harmless, like a promise to go to the park or even an icepop or poptart, depending on the time of day.

After I am done I make a big deal about how beautiful she looks and let her see in the mirror.

My daugher is now 4 and loves to have her hair brushed.

The best simple advise is use conditioner, detangler, distract and go slow.
Good luck!

We had a somewat similar problem with our daughter. Johnson & Johnson puts out a product called "no more tangles" that does help some. We also realized if her hair was well conditioned it was easier to brush. It is also easier to brush when it is still wet & well conditioned. We would also resort to candy occasionally to encourage her to let us "torture" her with the brush. We also found that we could brush her hair in stages. There were many days that she would run around the house with half of her hair brushed & the other half not but it would all be up in a pony tail. Then we would turn on Clifford after lunch & brush the rest. We also tried having her sleep in a braid. Some nights sh would cooperate & would wake up with much fewer knots. Other nights a braid was worse than a brush. Just keep in mind she will out grow this stage too.

after washing her hair, use conditioner....it helps...ALOT!!!
also go to snipits, and they have a hair detangler which works wonders too...:)

Hi!

I have a soon-to-be two year old who also has a beautiful head of hair. She was born with this lengthy wild hair and has worn a bow in it every day of her life, generally with a ponytail or two to keep it contained. The trick that has worked with her is to brush it while she's busy & can't get away... mealtimes! I keep a little box of ponytail holders on the kitchen counter with her hairbrush and I do her hair at breakfast, lunch & dunner. She complains a bit but is usually so busy eating that it goes quickly. The only drawback for me is trying to get the bib off without wrecking the hair!! She has aboiut 50 bows in various colors and now enjoys picking one out each morning before we go downstairs for breakfast. We're working on her tolerance of headbands now!!

Good luck!

My daughter went through this, too. We started using a shampoo that's specifically for no tangles. Suave makes a kids one with no tears and she loves the smell. We also use the spray on detangler, I usually get the store brand, it's just like Johnson & Johnson, just cheaper. Also, when she was about your daughter's age, I started making a big deal out of bows and things. We call them "pretties" and she loved having me put them into her hair.

There was also a time when I just had to hold her still and do it, crying and all.

glad it worked out. myu mom had to cut mine.

Hi C.~We bought one of those Ariel doll busts & our daughters enjoy styling her hair...maybe if your daughter's in control she'll endure her own hair brushing. We also bought some detangler w/a children's character on the packaging-that smells like apples-a novelty that made hair brushing something to look forward to. Good luck! -P.

My hair was that way when I was younger and my mother had to fight me with it all the time too. She just told me that if I wanted to keep it long I had to let her brush it every day or she would take me to get it cut into an easier shorter style. Of course I was probably about five then, but this might still work for you. I know my son was able to understand do this or you can't do this at 2.5. Good luck
D.

You could try these 3 suggestions...

1. Let her brush her own hair. She will learn a little independence from mom, and see that its not all bad.

2. Let her brush YOUR hair. This way, she see what a joy it is, and it will also give you bonding time.

3. Brush her hair while it is wet. This will losen any snarls and maybe not give her as much pain, if there is any.

I started putting conditioner in my daughters hair during bath time, and while they play I run a comb through their hair to get the worst of the tangles out. When I want to style their hair, I pull out the Princess Card and ask them which Princess hair style they'd like, if they can sit still. It works more often than you'd think! You might also try buying her a styling head, which comes with a hair brush and it's own accessories... it might excite her enough to let you use her as YOUR styling head while she "practices" on her own.

I have two girls and know all too well of what you speak. I tell my 2 1/2 year old I'm going to make her look like a princess and when we are done I take her to the mirror and tell her how pretty she looks. She doesn't mind getting her hair done now. I also let her watch her favorite chidlren's movie to keep her occupied while I'm doing her hair. You also might want to consider getting a detangler or leave-in-conditioner for her hair. This makes the hair more manageable and easier to get the comb and brush through. Of course you have to get one made for children. Hope this helps!

Hi C.,
My advice is distraction. My daughter too has a beautiful mane of hair and I usually have a plastic box in front of her filled with kiddie bracelets and necklaces and any neat old things you can find that might interest her. It keeps her busy while I brush it and try to make it look pretty. She too is 2 1/2 acutally almost three (October 8th. I am also a hairdresser so I have to have her hair look nice. I blow dry it every time after a bath too. She is used to it I've been doing it since birth. It's also a routine she knows well. Let me know how it works out and good luck.

Crissy S.

Sadly this was the case with a little girl I babysat for and he mom gave her a nice short bob that was easy to manage until she was ready for a good brushing!

Hi C.,
I to have a 2 1/2 yr old daughter only mine has naturally curly hair. Hers gets so awful you can't even get a brush through it!! I usually just have my daughter help me by holding the elastics or clips and telling her that she is beautiful and looks just like a princess. The other thing to do is to distract them by asking her to read a book to u while mommy does her hair! I don't know if this will work for you but it has helped me. Sorry I don't have any better advice!!

My daughter is the same way..what a pain!! We were just using the detanglers after bath and brushing it then and making sure it was dry befoer bed to avoid the trauma of brushing it in the am. We were using head band and little clips to keep it out of her eyes..and although it was pretty..it did look a little raggedy. We started playing "beauty parlor" and spraying ti wet, then using detangler. Next she gets to brush it, then I put it in a pony tail. Long process, but it does work. Now I do not even have to wet it...although she does whine a lot while I brush it...but it's better. Good Luck.

I have two daughters.. One is 7 and my other daughter is 3. My 7 year old has hair down to the back of her knees.... So trust me I know how you feel when it comes to hair. I always use the detangling shampoos and the spray. And when your about to brush her hair tell her a story and ask her questions while your brushing. It works for me until I hit a tangle ..lollol But try it and she could even look at a book while you brush... even buy a special one just for hair time... let me know how things go... wish you luck....

My daughter is know seven and has always had a lot of thick hair. when she was three I found that letting her pick the brush and hair ties or clips before doing her hair helped. I would also ask how she wanted me to do it. After I was done her hair I would let her brush mines and she grew to like helping and picking her "own" styles.

I have two daughters 7 and 4. I had the same problem. I made it fun for them. I let them pick out their barrettes and ballies. I also let them pick a favorite movie or tv show to watch while they are getting their hair combed. Any thing to distract them. Just make it fun and it will cause less anxiety for you and your daughter. Hope this helps.

Why don't you have her brush your hair first, and then it will be your turn. I know this will take some time, but it will get her to let you do her hair. Make it a game. Kids love games, and little girls especially love playing with their mommies. This will make for a little bonding too. And once you have her hair done, you can go and fix your own hair the way you want it. Just don't let her see it. Tell her she did a great job.

If it still doesn't work, you should consider keeping her hair a little shorter until she gets older and starts to care about keeping her hair nice.

Good luck.

Hi,
I'm just wondering if you're still having that hair problem. You know I swear by this stuff since my daughters hair is impossible to comb but I bought this thing called Remington tangle tamer it's pink and it's really cool. It has a plug to it so you can charge it and unplug when it's charge. I got mine at the dollar general for less than 3 bucks and It's the best investment and money well spent and my daughter is very happy. Now she tells me mom I have to comb my hair with the wiggling comb. They sell it on ebay too but I would not pay for what they are asking for.
Good luck!

This is it...Use Finesse "enhancing" conditioner...Finesse is the best conditioner ever...while still in the bath...spread around and comb through gently with one of those chunky wide tooth combs...my oldest daughter Nicole had long thick blonde hair to the waist
P.S. Be sure to use a clarifying shampoo occaisionally to avoid buildup

My daughter is 8 and to this day- still hates to have her hair brushed!!! I use a product in her hair by Paul Mitchell. It's a detangling spray. It really works and makes for a less stressful "grooming" session!!

Thats funny because my daughter is a little over 2 1/2 years old and still won't let me brush her hair. We even bought onbe of those soft brissel brushes but that doesnt get the knots out of her hair. She has nice curly hair but still wont brush it. I still havent found a way of brushing w/out her crying so i just let her cry while i do it.

My daughter has fairly short (only because it's taken SO long to grow - she was born bald and basically stayed that way until 20 months. I couldn't even put the tiniest "whale spout" in until nearly 2.) but very pretty curly hair - her head is covered in ringlets. As others mentioned, I think a separate conditioner is important. Also, be sure to thoroughly rinse shampoo and conditioner. I notice a big difference on days when my husband bathes her and just doesn't get that part since he usually complains about rinsing. I always use a comb with her hair - it's just always worked best for us. It's not necessarily wide toothed, but is more effective. I comb her hair while it's wet. Before styling I use a spritze bottle to make it damp again which also is helpful. Infusium leave-in - even diluted in the spritze bottle helps too. Sarah sits on the bathroom counter and either holds the bag of clips and holders and plays with those or brushes her teeth while i style her hair. With her hair damp, I don't really pull or hurt her head and she is distracted so she doesn't pay much attention to me. Oh - Sarah will be 3 Sept 11 and it worked through the 2 1/2 bump too.

Hi C.,

What is it that she doesn't like about it? Does it hurt her? Or does she just not want to sit long enough to let you brush it?

Can you try brushing your own in front of her to get her to want you to brush hers? Or maybe ask her if you can brush her dollie's hair, or have her brush her dollie's hair. Then, make believe dolly is brushing it.

I remember having a hard time having my own hair "combed" while wet. There was quite a crying session each time.

I still have hair that is hard to get the comb through, but I manage. :)

let me know if that helps.

R.

I just her cut her hair very short like a boy that I did to my daughters hair cut very short

Hi,

I have the same problem with my daughter. I find that doing her hair when she is in the bathtub helps because she is pre occupied with being in the tub.

We use the detangling spray and sometimes we play "beauty parlor". She gets to sit on a child sized chair and I brush her hair while we talk and "gossip" just like they do at a real beauty parlor. Hehe.

Hi C.,

My daughter just turned 2 and has wild, curly hair, and alot of it. She does not like her hair combed either, but if I don't do something with it- it is in her face all day and out of control. I do not let her watch much TV, so some days I will do it during her facorite TV show that I do let her watch in the morning (Dora) and she will let me do it then. Or sometimes I will give her a pen and paper and she will actually sit for a minute to draw. I am learning to be quick about doing her hair too, so it doesn't always look the greatest!! :-) One other trick I have found that usually works is I will let her "do" my hair, then I will do her hair. I usually use detangler on it to make it easier and not hurt as I am combing through her curls, luckily she hasn't yet figured out how to spray the detangler so she thinks it is great that she can "use" what I use in her hair too. Hoope this helps! Good Luck!

L.

Hi C.,

I'm sure your daughter is gorgeous, and kids with lovely long hair are so cute. My first child is about to be born this week, but I can speak as one who has heard through my entire life, "You have the most beautiful, thick hair." I still get it every time it's cut. In regards to your little one, I'm not sure the fight is worth it. I don't remember being 2 1/2, but I remember I hated when my mom did my hair as a child! Eventually she kept is chin length or a little shorter and told me when I could take care of it myself I could do what I wanted with it. It made life easier for both of us. By the time I was in first grade it was long and beautiful and no longer an issue. Another option if cutting it shorter is out of the question: I hated ponie tails, but loved pig tails. I don't know if that will help, but good luck :)!

D.

My daughter (now 5) went through the same thing at 2. I couldn't put any kind of clips or ponytail holders in her hair because "they're too tight". We made a special visit to "Little Snips", a hair salon in Scott Township that caters to kids, and I asked them to cut her hair into a short little bob. She looked just as adorable & I didn't have to fight the tangles. It grew back just as she was leaving that difficult phase and she's had it a varying lengths ever since.

If you're truly attached to your angels little locks, I use a detangling spray (it's usually in with the kids shampoo) when it's wet and occationally when she wakes up with "bedhead". I also use a little on my son to tame cowlicks. It should make the process a little faster and less painful for her.

I have a sweet alomst three year old. She too has beautil very curly hair. I have not even cut it yet. I haven't used a brush on her for several months. We sit in front of her favorite movie/show and I use my fingers to brush her hair. We have come up with some pretty cool styles - Sometimes this can last 1/2 hour. It is great bonding time and takes the fear out of having her hair "done" - good luck! C.

What I did with my daughter is took her to the store to pick out bows, ties, and all kinds of hair things she liked. Next, I made a big deal out of how to comb her hair...we had a girls night where I "taught" her how to comb her hair if it's wet & brush it if it's dry. I also bought her her own "hairspray" (detangler) and her own brush & comb. If she doesn't feel like wearing her hair up, she uses a headband to keep it back. Hope this helps!

Hi C., my daughter has super curly frizzy hair. What I started doing is wetting it under the faucet between shampooing and add some conditioner, then give her the brush. She does a better job herself. It takes a while longer but I dont get stressed from the yells and crying. Mabeye get a spray bottle and treat her like a salon. Hope it helps.

My daughter will be 6 in october and the stylist says we shouldnt straighten until puberty> What a long way to go.
Take care,
K.

i was told to use a comb on my girl's hair instead of a brush, because a brush will pull out to much hair and cause more damage. When my girl was 2 she wouldn't let me put her hair up either, and when she did, it was out again in a couple of minutes. I say just let her be. She is a kid, and she probably won't keep it in anyway! If you really need to style it, make it into a game. Try giving her a reward or something, let her choose her hair accessories and if she lets you put it in, then she can have an icepop or an extra book reading or somethign. Also, let her do your hair too. my daughter loved that one.

I know you're frustration well. My 8 yr old still has that wild hair. When she was 2, we used to play "hair salon". I'd always let her brush my hair first.

I have crazy, curly thick hair... I brush it once a week otherwise i end up with a frizzy mess. I find that the easiest place to brush it is in the shower. This is not the healthiest thing for your hair but it helps. After it has been conditioned i start at the ends and work my way up. Something about the combination of the conditioner and water helps.

Good Luck