37 answers

Cry It Out? - Lynchburg,VA

I have a 6.5 week old. I also EBF (not sure if this makes a difference).

I get mixed views on whether to let LO cry it out at night when putting him to sleep, or to keep going to him every time he cries until he finally goes to sleep.

Before bed he has been changed, swaddled, fed and burped. And most of the time he has fallen asleep during the feeding or is at least drowsy.

Is he too young to let him cry until he falls asleep?

ADD: I should say that I was asking this b/c my MIL and husband believe that CIO is the way to go. My MIL says, "he won't starve" if he is crying before the 2-3hr mark. My husband thinks the new generation is just making kids spoiled, although I told him you can't spoil an infant. I am all for going to him when he cries, and I do feed him when he wakes in the middle of the night. It's just I don't know what else to do for him after feeding, burping, swaddling, changing, etc. And a lot of the times I feel that he is just fighting sleep...but I still hate to let him CIO...and I've only done it once, and that was for 15min and then he did stop and slept for a good while. Anyway, I agree with all of you, but it is hard to deal with the MIL and older generation, and my husband (who apparently is old-school, lol).

What can I do next?

So What Happened?™

Ok, I guess I should have made it more clear earlier on that when I asked about CIO, I just meant when I lay him down to sleep...and he's not screaming out. If he does cry, like a real cry, I always go check on him/comfort him. But, there are times when he just fusses a little, so I wait a few min and then go check on him if he doesn't calm down. If he continues, I keep going back every few minutes and hold him/ pat him/ feed him, whatever he needs, and eventually i don't have to go back in b/c he falls asleep. That being said, my MIL was truly wanting to do CIO, as in letting him really cry for 15-20 min. But it's her generation I guess.

And I must say that if he were to cry suddenly in the MOTN, I would always check on him! I of course get up to feed him if he wakes, and I wouldn't just let him cry if he had been asleep and woke up crying...I'm not cruel, lol

Featured Answers

You want to let a SIX WEEK OLD CIO? Really?

If someone is suggesting that to you, don't ever take advice from them again!

10 moms found this helpful

You know, one of my kids was extremely fussy, still is. One of my biggest regrets is letting him "cry it out". He's 11 now and I still think that was the worst piece of advice I ever got.

9 moms found this helpful

Please respond to his every need. That is his only means of communication. That is way too young to let him cry it out. He needs to know you will be there when he needs you. Not that it matters, but I hate the cry it out method. I would rather my child go to bed happy than thinking mom won't be there when I need her.

8 moms found this helpful

More Answers

Even the people behind the CIO method, say that anything before 6 months is FAR too young. Your child has been on earth less then 2 months. Respond to his cries and don't expect him to sleep through the night. For goodness sakes!!

NO, do not let him cry himself to sleep. He is an INFANT.

11 moms found this helpful

You want to let a SIX WEEK OLD CIO? Really?

If someone is suggesting that to you, don't ever take advice from them again!

10 moms found this helpful

You will find people in favor of CIO. You will find people who say never CIO. But you will not find ANYONE who says that CIO is appropriate for a 7 week old.

And anyone who tell you this doesn't know much about babies, and you should be VERY VERY cautious about taking advice from that person on any baby-related topic.

When you have a question (or if your husband won't believe Mamapedia), get it straight from your pediatrician. Then you can say "The Pediatrician said it is too soon to do CIO." End of discussion.

9 moms found this helpful

You know, one of my kids was extremely fussy, still is. One of my biggest regrets is letting him "cry it out". He's 11 now and I still think that was the worst piece of advice I ever got.

9 moms found this helpful

Please respond to his every need. That is his only means of communication. That is way too young to let him cry it out. He needs to know you will be there when he needs you. Not that it matters, but I hate the cry it out method. I would rather my child go to bed happy than thinking mom won't be there when I need her.

8 moms found this helpful

He is definitely too young for CIO. He still needs to be fed every 3 or so hours. His nervous system is still developing. He needs you when he cries. He is learning that you will be there when he needs you. This is a time for developing trust.

Just think about how he was cuddled secure and warm for 9 months. He's only been in the real world for 6.5 weeks. Along with that is the fact that a baby is still developing in many ways. He's unable to control anything about his daily life. His body is still developing. He's not able to postpone such things as eating or any of his needs. When he cries, he's letting you know he needs something.

Here is a web site that talks about sleep training, including cry it out which is actually not what most people consider cry it out. One does not just let the baby cry until they go to sleep. There is a process involved that teaches the baby how to self soothe.

http://www.babble.com/baby/baby-care/baby-sleep-feeding-s...

Here is their comment about the first 3 months of a baby's life during which it's not appropriate for any sort of sleep training. The first three newborn months are basically going to be a free-for-all when it comes to napping, sleeping and eating.

"Most experts agree that in these formative months, it’s important to follow your baby’s needs as you settle into this new lifestyle change, so don’t even stress about issues like sleep training or feeding schedules."

After your addition. Letting him cry himself to sleep, taking 15 minutes is not CIO. It's cruel. Read up on how to do CIO. As Dawn suggested, you may not have to always pick him up if you get to him before he's screaming. Quietly pat him without picking him up and see if that works when he's just fussing.

My brothers and I were raised old school and our parents did not let us cry it out until were were closer to 1. Unfortunately they used the old school CIO which did let the baby cry until they fell asleep. Fortunately for the babies but not for me who shared a room with them, I brought them to bed with me so they didn't have to cry for long.

Also, since the old days, we know much more about a baby's development and what they need. Does your husband do old school for everything else? Perhaps he refuses to use a computer and still has his TV with tubes? He can learn. Take him with you to the pediatrician. Google baby development. Give him the book, Happiest Baby On The Block, to read. Go to the library or the bookstore with him and help him pick out a book. I doubt that he'll find any book that says to use CIO at 6.5 weeks. And........Letting him cry until he falls asleep is not the correct way to use CIO. Educate both of you.

8 moms found this helpful

Yes, IMO he is too young, for sure. He's just trying to figure this here world out. Snuggle him and feed him and swaddle him and love him.

Congrats on your baby boy!!!

7 moms found this helpful

I never could do the cio. Seems a little crazy. Why would you put your child in distress, get their heart rate up, and make them feel panic? My son, now 3, and my daughter who has just turned 1, sleep through the night. I went in whenever I heard them. They didn't get all clingy. Plus, you never know when something is wrong. In fact, last night my 1 year woke up crying about 2am. I went in there to find her leg caught between crib rails. I'm glad I went in there because she was jammed in there. What if I would have let her cio? Go with your gut mommy. You know what is best.

7 moms found this helpful

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