Breastfeeding - Buckeye,AZ

I weaned my daughter at a year, I cup her back to just when we wake up and just before bed, then down to just before bed, and then stopped! When she tried to go down my shirt (she always tried to help herself), I just gave her a sippy cup of whole milk, after a couple days, she got use to it and was fine with the transition! Good luck!

WOW! I'm impressed! Congratulations..now take a break and don't feel one bit guilty. My friend had a 2.5 year old boy who wouldn't quit either and she finally put lemon juice on her nipples and it did the trick! Good luck!

My daughter was the same way. It finally took a change of scenery to break her "habit". We went to my parents and she was so excited about all the things to see (only exciting to her 15 month old self!) that she hopped up in the morning, forgetting her morning feeding, and was so busy the rest of the day that it took a couple of days for her to remember what she was missing. Then I told her that it was all gone (I was not even full or uncomfortable with built up milk- a sign that she was not really getting nutritian from me- and she moved on after a day (and one tantrum). A change of scenery may not be an option for you, but maybe shaking up the routine and keeping her busy with unusual activities will break the habit.
Good luck!

Great job! Breastfeeding that long is hard work!

I weaned my first at 27 months when he was down to a couple feedings a day. He too never took a bottle. He wouldn't even take a sippy cup. He would nurse or drink from a regular cup only. And he would only drink water or breastmilk. I think maybe I had an advantage because of his age. He understood me pretty well.

My mother-in-law was down for Thanksgiving, so we had a pretty busy schedule. One day we left early in the morning and didn't return home until well after dark. We went to a park, coffee, lunch and diner. My son didn't ask to nurse, so I didn't offer. He fell asleep in the car. The next morning, I jumped up excitedly and offered imediate distraction. He didn't ask until that evening (I kept him up a little later than normal). I told him "not tonight, how about a book?". He was so tired and thrilled at the new book, he agreed and passed out. He didn't protest until the 3rd day of no breastfeeding. There was only a tear or two, but I held him until he fell asleep for the next week or so. I made sure to replace his "boob" time, with cuddle time.

Make sure that there's nothing big going on her life right now. Breastfeeding is a real comfort and weaning is best when the rest of the childs life is normal. You could also just cut down to one feeding a day, until she's a bit older. I sometime wish I had done that instead of weaning. Also, I recomend not letting her see your breasts until a few weeks after you wean. My best friend gave me this advise and I really think it helped.

I hope you do what's right for you and your daughter...Good Luck!!!

My son is 20 months and still nursing. I really enjoy that I have been able to do this for him, and appreciate the relationship we have. Unfortunately because he is older, I have gotten lots of unwanted advice from family. My husband even worried that my son was too "dependent" on me because of the fact that he was breastfed. I started to worry and began to think we should start weaning him, so I read some books and got some good advice, for once. Going cold turkey is bad for both you and your child. And breastfeeding does not make your child more dependent on you, but rather makes them more independent. They are more willing to explore and learn, because they know (from their nursing experience) that their needs will always be met. Good luck!

My sister-in-law breastfed her little girl until she was almost 2 and did not have any problems stopping then because I think they were both ready. What a joyous thing to share with your child and I hope(because I am currently nursing) that you just know when the time is right for yourself and child. Good luck and dont put so much pressure on yourself. S.

I definitely know what you are going thru. I have finally weaned my 3 year old. Yes 3 year old. He likes to co sleep, so it was no problem of him to have a nightcap before bed.
He is my fourth kid, and all of them have nursed exclusively. back to the subject, try distracting her with bedtime stories, or sing her a song, even try going for a drive. A nice calming bath and a story, what ever your schedule permits. If you start a new routine, to take the place of nursing, it will distract her from the fact that she is missing a feeding. You can try a reward system, a new book or toy or special mommy time for so many missed nursings. Going cold turkey might be too h*** o* your body, try just skipping one feeding at a time.
Hope this helps.

A.,

My son was very much like your daughter! He never took a bottle and was a voracious nurser! Here is what I did: I eliminated the daytime nursing (got rid of one a week) until I was just nursing him at bedtime. It was easier than I thought it would be since he was able to drink on his own from a sippy cup. I actually nursed him at bedtime until he was 18 months old (not because I am a gung-ho breastfeeder, I was just nervous about if he would give up the night-time nurse!) Then I had to go out of town for a few days. So, my husband had to put him to bed while I was gone- and he went to bed just fine with a small sippy cup of milk. If you can get down to just the nightime nurse, then have your husband put her to bed with a cup for a few nights in a row- that would probably do the trick. (I know they don't recommend putting them to bed with milk in their cup because of their teeth- but it won't hurt to do it for a few nights just to make the transition from breast to cup a bit easier.)

In hindsight, I made a bigger deal out of stopping the nursing than my son did! I think he was happy to keep doing it as long as I let him. But he did not raise a fuss about stopping like I thought he would. Basically, even though I felt SO ready to stop nursing- a small part of me did not want to let go of that closeness, liked the feeling that I was still so needed by him... Anyway, I'm sure this will work out just fine and with little fussing. Good Luck!

P. Borrok

Hi A.,

I can relate all too well! I breastfed one of my daughters until she was 22 months, I realized as her 2 year bday was approaching, I had to get her weaned. I will tell you what worked for me, but it took a month. You want to ease them out of it so it is not traumatic! What I did was I made a 4 week schedule...since you are down to 3 times a day you may be able to do it in 3 weeks. The first week keep breastfeeding her 3 times a day, the 2nd week go down to twice a day, and finally the third week go down to once (I usually did it before bed), and the next week just make bedtime very relaxing for her, and hold her close while she drinks her sippy cup, put warm milk in it. This worked wonders for us, it was slow enough for her that she did just fine, and seemed to not even notice that she was weaned! Hope this was helpful!
C. Helm

you poor thing!! i got spoiled with my daughter who couldn't breast feed. but i couldn't imagine doing it when she was 15 months!! since she is old enough for milk and will drink from a sippy cup, just gradually wean her slowly from breast to milk. i am sure she is eating normal foods so it's not her only form of food.

I had an old fellow tell me when I was breast feeding to wean my daughter by the almanac moon signs. I thought he was crazy but, I tried it. Beleive it or not she never ask for it again. It worked. So now guess what I believe in the moon signs for everything. Try it, I bet it works for you too.
Good Luck,
M.

OH how I can relate! I just weaned my 20month old daughter! My first son was weaned by 10 mos because I became pregnant with my daughter but he was easy. My daughter however was very attached and i am not one to just take it away cold turkey. I just would shorten the time I allowed her to breast feed. This sometimes made her mad but i would try to distract her with milk or an activity. If she was sick or tired was the worse so I kind of indulged her then but finally she herself went two days without wanting it so from then on I just said no and she would get mad but not like she use too. My problem with her was when I sat down to relax she felt she needed to breast feed. She was fine when we were out or when i was busy at home untill I sat down. I planned to feed her 12 mos so going the pextra 7 mos was not planned at all but from day one she took to breast feedong like a pro. I aso just wanted my body back especially since she would just come and pull my shirt up. Well good luck I know its hard.

Hi,
Here are 2 great books that deal with your issue: "The Nursing Mother's Guide to Weaning" and "How Weaning Happens"

I hope they can help you.
M.

Hi A.,

As a lactation consultant and a mother of two who also breastfed exclusively, I can tell you that each child is different. Weaning is a mutual decision and if you are ready, then I would suggest trying to eliminate one feeding at a time starting with the feeding that your daughter is the LEAST interested in - do this for about a week. Then, eliminate the next feeding of LEAST interest. If it takes longer than a week, it is okay - but generally a week in between each feeding elimination works well.

L. Kandell, MS, RD, IBCLC/RLC
Registered Dietitian/Pediatric Specialist
International Board Certified Lactation Consultant/Registered
AFFILIATED NUTRITION CONSULTANTS, LLC
8669 E San Alberto Drive Suite 102
Scottsdale, AZ 85258
###-###-####

Wow - I don't think I could breastfeed that long... it takes so much out of you. I only did up to 1 year. I would suggest just do a morning and evening feeding for a few days then start by taking the morning feeding away and replace with a sippy cup of milk (is she allergic to regular milk?). Then try that out for a couple days and then do the evening - replace with a sippy cup at dinner time. When you feed her breakfast give her the cup of milk and then dinner give her the cup of milk.

Lots of luck with weaning your daughter.

You are not selfish!! Breastfeeding is HARD work and your daughter has gotten all the benefits that she needs. I also breastfed my daughter until 15 months at which point I closed up shop. It took only about one day for her to make the adjustment and it took me about a week to quit producing milk. She also never took a bottle but it wasn't that big of a deal. Good luck!

K.

I nursed 3 children the longest being 22 months. My son was very easy, as he weaned himself. But my daughters LOVED to nurse. I understand completely when you say your "done with this". That is pretty much how I decided to wean mine was I just did not want to do it anymore. I am pretty laid back, so that is how I go about things. I started by not nursing for nap times. They would cry and fuss, but I would just hold them and rock them until they finally gave in and fell asleep. Once they did this without fussing or even thinking about nursing I would cut out the bed time feeding. Once they were comfortable with that I took the night time feeding away. They fussed alittle more with that one, but again I would just hold them and love them. Soon nursing was over and it was not too dramatic on any of us. I guess my biggest piece of advice would be to just stay calm and reassure her of your love. Hope that helps alittle!

Hi Anne Marie,
Congratulations on breastfeeding your daughter this far. That is quite an accomplishment, though I can certainly understand that you are ready to move on. You shouldn't feel selfish for wanting to move on- you have already given your daughter a great gift by nursing her this long.
Your daughter will wean, it just may take a little time. They say the best weaning strategy for children over 1 yr is the "don't offer, don't refuse" method. That's pretty self explanatory. You can also try some distraction at times where she usually nurses- reading a book or cuddle time. I just weaned my 23 month old son last month, and this has worked well for him. Weaning should always be gradual, it's better for your child's emotional health and also better for your breast health. You can also check with your local La Leche League (or even their website), or your pediatrician for more advice on weaning. Kellymom.com is also a good resource.

Good luck,
K. Allison-Pickering, RN, CLE

Well I am sure most peditricians would tell you that at 15 months, a bottle should NOT be given to the child. In fact, it is okay to give your child cows milk beginning at 12 months. Why don't you just give him/her a sippy with milk? Or if you wanted to continue to offer breast milk..pump and put that in his/her sippy cup.

I was in the same boat as you. My first quit pretty much by himself when he was 6 months old and my second at 18 months, my third she quit at 15 months( I started weaning her at 12 months). My advice is to be persistant, if a bottle doesnt work (didnt work for mine either), use a sippy cup. Both of mine didnt like regular milk either so I tried everything. Eventually they liked it but it took quite a while for them to develop a taste so I used chocolate milk or juice..pretty much whatever worked! Make sure you give her yogurt and things if she doesnt drink alot of milk right away.
Dont feel guilty about wanting your body back..I will not have any more kids and I dont feel bad for not wanting to breastfeed forever!!

Dear A.,
I am kind of in the same boat. My daughter will be 15 mos on August 17th. She still wants to nurse occasionally at bed time, but I don't have any supply anymore. I am trying to "modify" our bed time routine so she doesn't think about it so much. Does your daughter nurse at certain times? Like before she goes to sleep? If so, maybe get her sippy cup and sit in a chair with her and read her a book. Think of something else you can do that is comforting but not nursing. She isn't continuing for the nourishment - it's for the comfort. Don't feel selfish. You did great going this long! I work at home too and it's really difficult to juggle all of that(plus you have another one to take care of!) Hang in there and know you are not alone.

D.

I'm in the same boat. My 18 month old son won't quit. He is cosleeping and has learned that nursing and sleeping are one in the same. WHAT A PROBLEM! He wakes up constantly still and he has never slept through the night. I started refusing to feed him except when he first falls asleep. I've been letting him, a bit selfishly on my part, nursing again in the morning when it is around the time to get up because I'm so engorged from his not nursing through the night. I figured I would do this pattern for about a week and then cut out the morning feeding as well. Then, I'm moving him to his crib for naps and finally to his crib over night.

I was really surprised that he really didn't put up much of a fit when I refuse. He has quite a temper and has screamed for 2 hours at time in the past. He is my third child and he has certainly given me a run for my money!

I have two other children or should I say teens, 15 girl and 13 girl. They were such a breeze compared to this little guy. He so lucky he is so darn cute!

Anyway, I'm not sure if I've helped but hang in there....they are only little for such a short time...enjoy whatever it is...it will be gone forever soon!

GOOD LUCK!

Dear Anne Marie:
I am in the exact same situation - my firstborn was a son and he weaned himself at 7 months. My daughter is the same age as yours and she continues to want to breastfeed. My daughter will also drink juice and cow's milk from a sippy cup and from a cup with a straw in it. It is not uncommon for a child to refuse to wean. I recommend that you seek advice from a lactation consultant. In Tucson, I have enjoyed the resources offered by the lactation consultants at Tucson Medical Center, the Women's Health and Birth Center, and the Desert Doulas. I'm not sure where you are located, but I would bet you have someone available nearby who could offer advice that suits your personal preferences and lifestyle.

The cutoff for nursing is really personal, so don't worry about your daughter being too old. It is fairly common worldwide for mothers to nurse up to 2-3 years of age. However, if it is a problem for you, then it is time to wean. It can be done.

Best,

J.

A. -
I am still breastfeeding my son at 4 months and intend to until about 6-8 months. I have had to wean him off of the breast because I am also a mother who works full time. It has been difficult because he would much rather have me than the breast and will wait all day not to eat in order to have my breast. My daycare provider and I have found a way to make the bottle more enjoyable through playing games and fun time. It has been a process and one that my VERY strong-willed child insisted on not doing, but eventually gave in. The only thing I can suggest to you is to begin by only letting her have the breast 1-2 times a day if she is having it 2-3 times right now. After about 2-3 weeks of this make it no more than once a day. It can be difficult if your child is that old and still wanting to breastfeed, but she is smart enough and old enough to understand that she is a "big girl" and can drink from a sippy cup all the time. If anything, make it to where you will make the sippy cup an everyday thing and introduce regular cups as a progressive step. If at all costs, this is not helping and you have access to a breast pump, pump your milk and put it in the sippy cup for her to drink so that she will know that she doesn't have to be with mom to have the benefits of that yummy milk. Most of all though, I think it boils down to her wanting the closeness and comfort of her mommy.

A lot of times, babies want their mom and the breast for that comfort zone. Comfort her in other feedings so that she will understand that she can have you there and not have to breastfeed. Even if it comes down to you letting her nuzzle into your breast while she is drinking from a sippy cup. It will be a process and could take a while, but it is better for her in the long run. Keep up the hard work, because it is difficult and strenuous. Just remember it is harder on you than it is on her. =0)

By the way, (if you don't mind me asking) what do you do to stay at home with your gils as a business? I would love to be a stay at home mom who works as well, especially because I am finishing with my degree. Daycare is a lot of money and I love to spend time with my baby. Any suggestions?

Good Luck!!
M.,
Denver, CO

My brother and sister-in-law went through such a thing recently. My niece will be three in two weeks, and she just stopped three and a half moths ago. Myself, my daughter statred using a bottle for two weeks at nine months then strait to the sippy cup. Though I feel breastfeeding is the most wonderful thing you can do, if it becomes a burden, or not a burden, but if you just feel the time is right, you are the Momma and you have to make these choices for your child. Break down the feedings more. Cut one feeding every three days. Talk to her about it. She may be young, but she does understand her mommy loves her. She won't hate you for it. In fact, once she is over the shock, and there will be shock, she will find an independence she is not able to understand, but she will love it. And just imagin the pride you will have as her Mommy. True, she won't be a baby, for long, but isn't it our goal as parents to "raise" our children? This is just a part of that. Time will go no slower nor faster if you do or don't breastfeed. Make sure she understands you love her and are not being mean. Distract her. Let her color, mold, splash, whatever it takes to get her mind off of it. Be strong, you can do it. Apparently you love your daughter very much, and want the best for her, now you choose which it is.

My daughter weaned herself at 26 months. I figured that she was still nursing because she still needed it for nutrition, comfort, etc. She never took a bottle either. I'm a stay at home mom, so it wasn't inconvenient for me. I wish I had more advice for you other than wait for your daughter to tell you she's done. You might want to check the Le Leche League site for suggestions. I have heard that the distraction method is supposed to work though.

I breastfed my first child until she was two and a half. I, too, was always wondering when she would stop. She did quit on her own. Just from my experience, your daughter is not ready to stop. Since you have elected to breastfeed, hang in there. And try not to convey to her that you want her to quit or that you are sick of it. I think it's the most important part of a child's early develpment, that bond with the mom, and, of course, all the natural nutrients you are providing.

Hope that helps.

Hi Anne Marie,

I live in Verrado, so we are not that far away.
I have two children and I breastfed them both.
Maybe you could try a sippy cup for 1 of the feedings to see how it goes. Or even a bottle. Since the bottle is different, she might think that it is something special.

Both of my children were scheduled. I weened them off after 1 year. I dropped 1 feeding a week. The sippy cup worked great for us. It has been along time since I have nursed. My youngest is 4 years old. I hope this helps.

T. O.