Bras for a Twelve-Year-Old Female

Updated on July 17, 2014
H.S. asks from East Haddam, CT
14 answers

I am using my mother's account to ask you a question regarding my bras. I am an eleven year old female, turning twelve in 23 days. I am going into seventh grade and have been having some issues with bras. I am quite insecure about my bra size. I am the largest in my grade with 36DD breasts. My friends make fun of my size. Do you know how to prevent this? Also, where can I find adorable bras in my size? I apologize for any grammar errors. My cell phone would not let me read what I was typing.

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E.T.

answers from Rochester on

Google Yellowberry bras. They are designed by an 18 year old girl and might be what you are looking for.

2 moms found this helpful

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K.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

My daughter is 13 and although she's not quite as large as you, she IS a 34D. We recently went bra shopping at Aerie in our local mall. Cute, comfortable bras that fit her shape well and they were on sale for $20 each.

For now, ignore your 'friends' or fight back with "Aren't they GORGEOUS?! I LOVE them!". Your friends are jealous, insecure or simply rude and inconsiderate (none of those things are desirable traits, are they?).

In a couple of years, some of them will catch up to you in size and some won't. Have confidence in yourself. Trust that your size is perfect *for you*. And make sure you stand up straight with good posture. I've seen large breasted girls start to hunch over or fold their arms over their chests to hide their size. It'll actually make you look bigger and you'll stand out even more because of your bad posture and insecure, defensive stance. Stand up straight, head tall, ignore those rude remarks from people (difficult, I know). Have confidence in yourself, that's the BEST way to overcome that ridiculous teasing.

4 moms found this helpful

V.S.

answers from Reading on

I feel your pain. I developed early and large and was teased mercilessly. In my mid 40s, I still get ignorant comments and observations from people, adults who should know better. It's humiliating, and yet, it is what it is and it doesn't change. 36DD is my exact size. And because I'm really small, it might as well be 48GGG. I look completely out of proportion. All I can tell you is that nature/God/your genetics made you that way because that is the way you were meant to be. Be proud of who you are. A lot of the girls who made fun of me went on to have breast enlargement surgery, so what does that tell you? Jealous much? And I totally get your desire to have adorable bras. At this size, they are hard to come by. It's not for others to see. Even if you're the only one who sees it, it feels better to look pretty under your clothes than to just have the industrial, old lady white ones.

TJMaxx, Marshalls, Kohls are all good places for larger sizes and lower prices. But definitely have a proper fitting before you go- a place like Macy's or even Victoria's Secret will be able to help you (you're a little young for VS, but honestly, they are one of the few places that will be able to help fit you). Buy one bra there, and then take that sizing experience and go buy them cheaper at a discount store.

4 moms found this helpful
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S.B.

answers from Kansas City on

I'm a similar size to yours, and I buy my bras at TJ Maxx and Marshalls. They have cute ones and they're much cheaper than regular stores.

I highly recommend you read this article about measuring for the correct bra size: http://www.epbot.com/2013/04/everything-you-never-knew-yo...

I followed her instructions last year and bought new bras according to the new size (Was wearing 36C should have been wearing 36DD) and it helped a lot. My bras are a lot more comfortable now. Sometimes it's hard to find the DD size, but a lot of times the 38D will fit ok as well.

3 moms found this helpful
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M.P.

answers from Portland on

You could shop in the women's lingerie department. I wear that size and choose styles that say they minimize. I suggest you go to a store that have someone to fit you. The right style and size of bra will make your size less obvious. I like the service I get at Nordstrom.

2 moms found this helpful

J.L.

answers from Minneapolis on

Every girl your age is insecure about something. You're insecure because of your size and the girls who haven't developed at all are also insecure and so they lash out. My daughter was very disappointed to learn I got boobs after high school - she's a B and she's 16.

I've gotten some adorable ones for my teen daughter at Kohls in the Candies section. Check out TJ Maxx also. A fitted sports bra could also help minimize.

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M.B.

answers from Austin on

I would also recommend getting a proper fitting. Some places will try to tell you that it is a 36DD, but it in all reality can be one of the sizes that most stores don't carry.

Is there a "gap" under the bra, under your breasts? That is because you don't have the proper size.

Yes, properly fitting bras are more expensive, but once you get into a proper sized bra, you will be surprised how much more comfortable you are!

My daughter is a 32 or 34 F.... she used to try to "fit" into one of the 36DD type bras.... they never did fit properly! She goes to a specialty shop in our area called "Petticoat Fair" . Once you are fitted properly, you may be able to find more of that style online, at hopefully a lower price.

2 moms found this helpful

B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

A friend of mine in high school developed large and early.
You want a minimizing bra and you wear clothes that don't emphasize your bust - no tank tops or spaghetti straps or anything that shows a lot of cleavage.
Why can't you talk to your mother about this?
You would benefit from having a proper sizing done at a major department store.
You want something that offers support (helps keeps your back from aching), minimizes bounce, and probably cushioned shoulder straps so they don't dig in to your shoulders.
What does 'adorable' have to do with it?
(what 12 yr old uses the word 'adorable'?)
You need 'functional'.
Besides wearing a minimizer during the day, you might also need some support at night so look into a leisure bra to wear under your pajamas.
Same thing with swim suits - you need a suit with really good support.
If you support them right, you'll keep the skin from stretching out and they'll be less likely to sag a lot as you get older (although some of that has to do with genetics).
When you are older and you're done with child bearing and breast feeding if your breasts are really causing you a lot of discomfort you might want to consider breast reduction surgery.

http://www.barenecessities.com/Minimizer-Bras-Bras_catalo...

1 mom found this helpful
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K.A.

answers from Boston on

My daughter is eleven and has the same issue with bigger than average breasts for her age. We avoid Victoria’s Secret b/c those bras tend to cater to the ladies that WANT a bigger bra size. The majority of those bras are padded. We do shop at TJ Maxx and some sports stores since my daughter prefers sports bras, she finds them most comfortable. Also, I have brought her to Lady Grace (find online too) to be fitted. Lady Grace caters more to the older lady but they do carry some attractive unpadded bras and sports bras that my daughter finds very comfortable and we know she is getting the proper fit there.
I wouldn’t consider breast augmentation right now. Your breast may actually go down a bit as you get older. I was the first in my class to develop breast and they were very big. I was also teased by my school “friends” just as you are. Years later as I got older (late 20’s) and had children my breast size went down a few cups. I have met other women who experienced their cup size going down as they got older and or had children.
I wish you the best

1 mom found this helpful
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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I was in about that same size not too much later than you are.

What you need to understand is this. IF you don't give your breasts good support they're going to be hanging to your waist by the time you hit high school and never be nice again.

If you want to have nice breasts that stay........mmmmm.....perky....then you have to go with a good bra that gives you the best support.

I wore a minimizer bra for many years. The way the wires and the fabric are sewn the breast is more relaxed in the cup but not free to drop down and stretch muscles.

I suggest you go to a store that has a sizer on hand, Penney's used to do this and so did Lane Bryant's.

When I go to the mall where Lane Bryant is I take sometimes 20 - 30 bras in and I try on every single one of them. I don't use under wires anymore because I realized I don't need that poking me all day anymore.

I will suggest that you and your mom sit down together and look at the link I'm adding. It's all the bras at Lane Bryant.

But seriously, you are way too young to do a plunge bra and some of the deeper v fronts. Boys will notice and think you're advertising. You will bend over and your top will hang down and they'll see everything you're got, okay? You have to keep the girls supported and covered.

http://www.lanebryant.com/cacique-plus-size-sexy-bras-int...

On the middle of the right side it says find your size. You and your mom need to do this together. She should help you measure so you're getting the measuring tape right across the apex and at the right spot for your ribs.

Then I'd like to suggest that there are many many bras on this site that would work well for you. I have bought bras at Walmart and other places like that for half the price of Lane Bryant's regular price and those bras haven't lasted a year.

I buy my bras at Lane Bryant when they're buy one get one or each are on sale. I wash them in hot water with bleach and dry them on perma press. They last several years and don't lose their stretch or support. If I dry them on high over and over they do seem to break down sooner.

I think you will find every bra you need at a local Lane Bryant store.

1 mom found this helpful
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P.G.

answers from Dallas on

Ross Dress for Less has them but it takes some hunting. The prices are very reasonable. I've seen commercials for a place called Soma, but I've never been there. Good luck.

And your "friends" are jealous and insecure because they aren't physically maturing at the same time/pace you are. If you can be honest with them and ask them to be real friends and cut it out, do that. Otherwise, you may find others to hang out with who aren't jerks.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.F.

answers from New York on

If possible have your mom take you to the nearest store (INTIMACY). They are also on the web. They offer more sizes that any regular store. Two of my older neices and very well endowed but are small framed petite girls. I used to buy their bra's from JC Penny and Macy's until I took them to Intimacy.

One neice is a 32HH and the other is a 30J. No you won't find these bra sizes at the usual stores but it is important to have the proper fitting bra. They both love their new bras and have vowed to NEVER go to another store.

Most places only go up to perhaps a 34DDD but when you don't fit that then what? They tell you you should have a bra that isn't the proper fit. Intimacy has more sizes and fit you like no other.

Check them out on the web: www.intimacy.com

They are worth every cent.

1 mom found this helpful
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M.F.

answers from Chicago on

My daughter is older than you (college age) but has always had the same problem. She wears either a 30E or 32DD, which most stores don't carry. Many bras in that size look "old-ladyish" in her eyes. I take her to Nordstrom because they have cute, young looking styles in unusual sizes. You also get expert measurement and advice. The fitters will bring you batches of bras to try, so you're not left hunting through the racks on your own.

Sorry your friends are giving you a hard time, I don't really have any advice for you on that. I went through the same thing, for the opposite reason. Unfortunately, some kids are just looking for somebody to pick on.

P.L.

answers from Washington DC on

Do NOT go to Victoria Secret! They are allflash, no substance girl! Their sizes don't go up high, their bra's elasticity do not last, they're semi pricy & not worth it. Plus their "bra specialists" do not measure correctly. This is me speaking as a former bra specialist, they get trained to sell. I received GREAT advice from a wardrobe specialist, get fitted at a high end store like Nordstrom's but you don't have to buy from there.
You are supposed to handwash bras but can get away with delicate cycle, in a lingerie bag, then air dry. Now here is something I learned last year; do not wear the same bra more than one day in a row. I always thought, hey if its clean I can wear it 2/3 days in a row. Switch out bras. If you wear it 2 or more days in a row you, gets too stretchy & loses it's shape & elasticity.
I know its hard but try not to let the other girls teasing get to you. They probably are jealous or insecure themselves.
P

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