Bad Dancers-Is There Any Hope for Us?

I have been told that I "dance like a white girl," whatever that means. I am not a great dancer, but I enjoy it. What I lack in grace, I make up for in enthusiasm.
Don't worry about what strangers on the dance floor think. Why should their opinion matter? If want to dance, dance.

I just learned not to care about what others might be thinking, because chances are they are too busy living their own lives to really even notice me and my bad moves. And if they do notice me and my badness makes them smile so be it, who doesn't love to smile :)

Fly your freak flag! Embrace your inner Elaine!
YouTube videos

oh my. are we sistahs?
my method of 'dancing' when i was younger was mostly an imitation of the exotic male dancers at the club where i used to work. it got a lot of attention. it wasn't due to my mad dancing skillz.
there are few things in my life that i regret, but my 'dancing' is surely of 'em.
the only time i dance any more is privately, in ritual, for the glory of the gods, and They don't care how bad i look. it's more of a moving meditation, with a little fat ol' gal bellydancing thrown in.
no way would i do it in front of humans!
on the rare occasions i do hit a dance floor any more, it's more of a gentle shuffle and sway sort of thing. maybe psychotropic drugs ARE the answer!
:D
khairete
S.

Dancing is supposed to be fun!!! STOP being self-conscious about it. REALLY!! You've got this!!!

Your hips don't move? RELAX!!!

Just let the music guide you!! HAVE FUN!!!

I can't sing. I can't dance. But I have fun!!!!

Interesting... the life progression for me was the opposite. Through my teen years,I thought I couldn't dance, and then by college, I decided maybe I could. I did a few modern and African dance classes for PE credit, and I participated in some folk dance groups. I definitely would not quit my day job to make a living from dancing, however I do love it (along with not being terribly 'good'). I'm firmly convinced that 'good' or 'bad' dancing is more about the dancer's attitude towards themselves as they dance. If the person is having fun and expressing their joy, it looks good regardless of whether they would win a contest.

By the way, not all dance styles involve moving the hips! For example, Israeli folk dancing focuses much more on moving the legs and feet, with almost no hip movement. If you do want to explore some other styles, try a Western or line dance group, or most kinds of European folk dancing. Yeah, you have to learn a series of steps, however that's part of the fun. Or you could go the psychotropic drug route, though I personally like being able to remember what I did... :)

ETA: I wasn't thinking of a formal class; more something along the lines of a dance club, like a line dance group which gets together once a week or once a month just to dance and have fun. They're informal and often offer some instruction for newcomers in the first hour or so. It's cheap and fun, and there should be no snootiness. Just a thought...

LOL at your question!

I've never been able to dance. I mean, really. It's beyond embarrassing. For me, confidence means accepting that. It means saying, "Hey, I can't dance. It's part of my charm."

I was going to suggest getting drunk but looks like you already tried that. Maybe try more than a " few" drinks.

I have to say go for the Psycotropic drugs! I mean hey, if it means we have a chance to dance well, then I'm all for it. :)

No, really, I guess if you took a dance class with a professional you might have a shot. Or, one of those pole dancing classes. Those are supposed to loosen you up in the hip area pretty good.

Personally, I dance bad, always have, always will, its who I am. I accept it. I just make sure I stay with the kiddos and then no one notices how bad I am. And, if you're at a bar, then the rest of the people are probably too drunk to notice or care.

Just go for it and DANCE lady dance!

This same thing happens to me though I don't have many opportunities to dance. I think it's one thing to dance a specific dance that has structure and steps - line dancing, waltzing, etc. It's quite another to go to a club and let loose when you are in your forties or fifties. First of all, you are probably a little rusty with the dance moves - you are out of practice; second you probably are a little less flexible; third, your dancing style is dated because you are...not 20. I personally used to love to dance and thought I was a pretty good dancer. Now when I dance I feel awkward and I don't feel sexy and powerful, which is how I felt when I danced as a young adult. I think that is why organized dance can be fun for older people - line dancing, etc. I think structured dancing is more enjoyable as you age because it's timeless and easier. But if your real question is can I go to a wedding or bar and not look like a fool when I dance I would second the comment made by AKmom...people are more concerned with themselves and really, what do you have to lose? Have fun.

I can't dance and I can't sing. I do both behind closed doors and with gusto to make up for what I can't do in public. :) You are clearly not alone based on all the replies so far. As an aside my husband and I plan on taking dance lessons. I'll let you know how that goes...badly is going to be my guess. LOL...

Lol. I have never been able to dance. I remember some friends taking me clubbing for the first (and only... Lol) time when I was 19... They tried to teach me to dance. I was standing there, and they told me to move my hips. So I did... And was told not to move my legs. .....ok. So I try again, and was told not to move my torso. JUST my hips. I was standing there like... But my hips are effing CONNECTED to my torso/legs! I can't move them independently! Lol. These girls made it their mission to teach me to dance after that... But after 3 months of failed "lessons," they gave it up and diagnosed me with white-girl-can't-dance-itosis. ;)

I am also entirely too prudish to do the grind/twerk/hump that passes for dancing...

So the most I do is bob my head. If I'm really into the music, I might sway or bounce a little. Lol.

If you really want to learn to be comfortable dancing, maybe you should start with a class, as suggested by Anne L.

Take your joy where you can get it. Dancing is joy, and people love to watch people having fun. If you really feel it, people won't judge you. Have you seen some of those viral YouTube videos of people caught dancing? Like the woman at the bus stop? (She is a good dancer, though.)

get the just dance video and play it. its a good work out as well as getting you used to moving. i play it with my granddaughter and grandson. they are the worlds least critical of me lol. so its fun for all of us and it gets some exercise in. you could play it with your little one.

Some people just stink at it.
I stink at it and always will. One of my kids can't really follow a beat...not a lot of hope there.

Nothing wrong with doing what you enjoy, though.

If you aren't a good dancer, do not take a dance class. I did when I was dating my husband and what a mistake that was. I told him I didn't have a good track record with classes, that when I took a yoga class, the teacher singled me out and had everyone stare at me as the "what not to do" example. He had taken this dance class before and reassured me that wouldn't happen.

Well, guess what happened in dance class? Same thing! "Class, take a look over here at what not to do." Mortifying, especially on day one of a beginners' class. I left the room in tears. The teacher came out and apologized, but I was done.

I'm really not THAT uncoordinated and stupid, but classes make me feel that way.

If you're even considering a class, I would make sure you learn the basics from videos first. You can practice in the safety of your home and get the basics down before putting yourself out there to "input" from teachers.

the only folks i consider "bad" dancers are those who think they're too good to dance. get out there and have fun. anyone who judges you is not worth being concerned about. and even kids, who will be embarrassed of their parents no matter what, will learn a valuable lesson: do something that brings you joy and connectedness, even when it's difficult or doesn't look like everyone else. and most importantly, that it's okay sometimes not to care what other people think.