5Th Birthday Party...1st Friend Party!

Opening presents is a great time waster. I know that having 20+ gifts there will make opening a chore, but you wouldn't have to think of anything else to do. And 5 year olds love to see the presents. You could have them decorate cupcakes or cookies and then eat them.

My son went to the first birthday party with friends from school when he was 5. He came home with a bag of goodies, and thought he got the raw end of the deal. Because of this, I sat him down and explained it wasn't his birthday. The birthday boy gets the better gifts, and he's lucky to come home with anything. He was really grumpy and I told him we would return the goodie bag and that would fix the problem. We did. Then I had to explain why later to the little guys mother. Not to be offended, but just to take it back.
So -- no goodie bag. At this age their too young to process this idea.

First 20 is way too many kids for a 5 year old, but I had to make that mistake too.
(It's way too overwhelming.)
The "goodie bag" is the "gym" leave it that way.
As for more things to do.
How about asking what is your best part around the room and try to quiet them and get them thinking while the cake is being passed out. As they get their piece the best part is....
Maybe they'll say cake, but who cares, someone cared enough to ask them.
Or what is your name and tell us something special about you?
But, something personal.
One on one time is hard. Each kid needs to feel special in the moment.
I love the idea of taking a picture of the kid and the gift giver with the gift/or card open or not - then the thankyou can come with the picture (I am a big picture person.) It's small - represents a portion of time in a kids life, and makes them automatically special. They love mail too - so send the thankyou! (Parents will bless the moment of quality time too.)
I would do one serious picture and one funny face picture.
That will cover the time, giving each kid a special moment
with the birthday child and one pic with the entire group.
I used to say ahead of time,(on the invite) Please no gifts. (Taking away the obligation for those who really can't afford it but would like to come. As well as taking away from the expection that they will get something automatic - just because it is their birthday. Meaning in life, you may or may not get presents and that is OK.)
Usually all cards (even many home made) came with a little $$$. What kid doesn't like money?
This is a good way to get a college fund started.

We all have too many toys by 5. (The gift being friends and family together having a really good time together at the gym.)
Think spray cheese, silly string or spray whipped cream
if you want a lot of fun and a lot of mess. And if you want to give a gift - make sure to include some silly string.
The parents will hate you but the kids will know a good time.
Once my kid came home with candy cigarettes - and I didn't even think that was funny. (Middle school age) But, my son thought that was hillarious that I got upset about that.

Have fun! It's a party! Many kids don't like taking pictures, but they are often the ones who really appreciate having them especially come "senior" year when they're asked to turn in a picture of them with their friend/s from an earlier year for the YEAR BOOK. Then those "old photos" become GEMS.

(Age 9 and "the end of the single digits" - that would be a good time for 20 kids - and this one should be a total surprise party!)
Cheers to you A. - for asking our opinions.
Once I filled a pinata with individually wrapped bags of candy - sewing each bag so each kid would have exactly the same amount of candy - so it would be fair...
and the teacher said...
Why did you do that?
I said I wanted it to be exactly fair.
She said - you want your child to grow up thinking life is going to be fair, that is going to be a hard one to play out my dear. Because, LIFE ISN'T FAIR, and the best time to learn is as early in life as possible!
That was a wise teacher - on a rare occasion I see her and thank her for that and other pieces of advice.
She was the one who had a diaper cake in her room and for each birthday child they started the day singing happy birthday to the birthday child. No one got cake - she just had the kid hold the diaper cake while being sang too.
For those that had a summer birthday they picked a day to celebrate theirs after having the entire class of birthdays on a calendar - making sure it was a day no one else celebrated their birthday.
Each kid is special.
Cheers!
sky

We just had our first friend party last week, also for the big #5.
We had way too much time!
And they didn't care about eating, even though it was cake and ice cream.
So I'd ditch the drink/snack idea entirely.
I don't know why you don't want to open presents. That was the kids' favorite part, and it gives all of them a good opportunity to learn manners. Talk with your child about saying thank you, and what to say if he doesn't like it, and what to say if he already has the item that he receives.
And honestly, that was their favorite part of the party! We warned them ahead of time that we would not be able to take the toys out of the packaging, though (that would have been mayhem), so they'd have to come back for a play date another day. The best part was that after the presents were open, they started throwing all the tissue and wrapping paper in the air, jumping around and laughing. It was GREAT! After a few minutes of that, we had all the kids race to see how fast they could shove all the wrapping into a big box, so they cleaned it up by themselves.
I think kids will be supremely disappointed to not see their friend open the gift from them. After all, that's a basic part of most birthday parts. Sing Happy Birthday, eat cake, open presents. Everything else is just a bonus.

We had a craft to do, and wow, did they love that! My husband and I were the only adults, and it was a little hectic at first, but the kids had so much fun, and loved their rockets.
We also played a version of pin the tail on the donkey, tailored to our party theme.

I don't think kids that age will be good at guessing candy in a jar, unless you do a small jar with large pieces of candy, say about 10. I also don't think they understand why somebody would get a prize and not everyone. We didn't have a prize for our game, except announcing that everyone did really great, and Tanner did it best. That was enough, seriously! They were already on to the next thing by then.

I wish we'd had more games planned, because we ran out of things to do and still had time before parents arrived. It's easier to have lots of games planned and have a few go un-played than to end up with empty time on your hands while the kids run amok.

Here's an idea for a craft, but it will take some planning. Let the kids decorate their own goodie bags. Just have stickers and crayons or washable markers and let them draw on a white (or even brown) paper sack and write (or help them write) their names on them. Then have someone working on slipping the goodies (you could have them already split up in baggies) into the bags while you're serving cake or opening gifts.

Another thing to remember is a piece of paper to write down who brought which gift so you can write thank you notes.

My 2 best food ideas for kid's parties are juice boxes instead of having to pour everyone drinks (just be prepared by poking all the straws in while the kids play in the gym so they are ready to roll) and the individual icecream cups with the little wooden spoons - kids love them and they usually come in bags of 10, so you can get a variety of flavors without having a bunch of melting leftover 1/2 gallon containers, and best of all, no scooping.
As far as using up time, I think the point of having a "destination party" is that you don't have to come up with activities yourself. The hour in the party room should be cake and presents time. Your guests will be sorely dissappointed if they don't get to see their friend open their gift. It is truly one of their favorite parts. It will likely be a little chaotic with 20 guests, but most kids work hard to find their friend the perfect gift and they want to see it appreciated and be thanked. The rule about not opening packaging in the previous post is a very good one, not only to elimate mess but to allow you to make returns on duplicate gifts.

www.birthdaypartyideas.com is a great resource!!!

I really believe you should rethink the no opening gifts idea. My 5 year old recently went to a party where his gift was not opened and he was VERY disappointed that his friend wasn't allowed to see what he had agonized to choose. He won't even speak to this friend anymore he is still so upset about it. We've done parties where we opened presents at another location and it really was easier than transporting unopened gifts. We just brought a big box and as each gift was opened we snapped a picture of the birthday boy and friend with the gift, then the gift went in the box and on the kids went on to the next gift.

If you feel you really want to skip the best part of a 5 year old party than putting toppings on cupcakes, or ice cream cups takes up a lot of time, makes a huge mess, more so than wrapping paper. Anything with glue or scissors will be fun too but also much more of a mess. Those simple clean crafts will be a rejected. I should know I just spent an hour with 17 5 year olds at my son's Valentine's party. The mom that organized it had large foam shapes and smaller foam stickers for the kids to make a card. It took them all about 5 minutes and then most of them just left them on the table. 3 year olds would think it's great but these kids are learning bigger skills and want to show them off.

I completely agree about not having a door prize. 5 year olds do not understand why only one person got a prize and everyone else was left out. It will only create a lot of hurt feelings.

20 kids will definately be crazy! He had 17 at my sons 5th birthday. As long as you keep them focused on something they shouldn't get too out of hand. I think a craft is a great idea - it always takes up time too. I agree with many of the responces, you should let your son open presents with his friends there - just don't let anyone actually "open" the toys. There are so many fun game ideas too. My advise to you would be to have a lot of things planned - even if you don't get to them all. It's better to keep them busy so it doens't get too wild. GOOD LUCK! And Happy Birthday to your son!

Twenty 5 yr olds and crafts don't mix. I go and help out in my son's kindergarten class for holiday parties and crafts and it is a mess. The kids have fun most of the time, but I wouldn't recommend doing it at the birthday party with that many kids.
I don't understand why you want to take the gifts home and open them there. I always have the child who gives the gift take a picture with my kid so I can remember who gave what and send an extra copy with the thank you card. If you are worried about the gift opening taking too long, don't. At 5 yr old, they will rip through them so fast.
And why do you want to do a doorprize? It is your child's birthday party. You are paying for the time at the gym, the cake, and other expenses... it is really not necessary to give them a prize. How many of the guests are going to be broken hearted about not winning the door prize? I don't want to be there to see the moaning and crying over that one. Most parents give out a small goodie bag with a handful of candy and a small prize like a pencil or toy you can buy in the Walmart party aisle.
It is so sad that we "have" to give goodie bags out now, it is expected. I am 32 yr old, and when I was a kid and had a group birthday party they brought me gifts and my parents paid for the skating party and pizza. We didn't give goodie bags back then.
I wish you luck at your child's party. Hopefully you can get some of the parents to stay and help run the show.

There are SO many fun party games taht are perfect for 5 year olds, but I would not recomend a game where you have clear "winners" and "losers" because 5 year olds are not really able to be good sports quite yet. Duck, duck, goose, oin the tail on the donkey (or the whatever on the whatever, there are many fun variations), button, button, who has the button, hot potato, and there are many others, you can do a seach for kid's party games. Since you have such a large group, maybe you can break the kids up into two or three groups for the games, and have two other adults supervise the other groups during the games. Just make sure that whatever you play every child gets a turn and that winning and loosing is not focused on, have all the adults helping try to keep the kids from teasing one another and being poor sports. Good luck, you are a braver mom than me to host 20 kids! I have always gone by the rule of thumb of inviting the same number of children as years that the child is turning, but I am sure it is going to be fun with a big group, just a little more work.

Hi A., I'm not sure how much time this will take up, but I like the idea of a craft. what about making the craft a decorate your own cupcake? Have a bunch of different sprinkle toppings, spreadable frostings, and decorator ones that come in the tubes with the tips already on them. You could also do sugar cookie decorating instead of cake, and let each child decorate a few, then each could have a gladware sort of disposable tupperware thing to take them home in if you wanted to stretch out the time. Your child could have their own little cake to decorate. Not sure if this helps, but maybe gets the wheels churning on some ideas. Good luck, and have fun! You'll be fine with 20 kids. If your child has that many friends, then you're probably used to being around a herd of 5 year olds!

20 Five year olds? Your child must be very well liked. How fun! Don't freak out, the party will take on a life of its own and you don't have to plan very much for that hour. You will have plenty to fill the hour doing cake and signing happy birthday and taking a few photos. You probably won't have time to open 20+ gifts. 60 minutes, 20 gifts = 3 minutes per gift. I suggest opening 1 or 2 special gifts from Mom and Dad and then save the craziness of paper and keeping up with all the keepsakes for later when you and your child are at home. Be sure to take plenty of photos of your child and friends at cake time. I want to come. Of course, kids DO LOVE watching the presents being opened.

Hi A. - sounds like it's going to be a fun party!

Even without opening gifts, that hour in the cake room is going to FLY by so try not to overprogram.

If the tables look fun and you have drinks, candy and their party bags at the tables, then they will automatically come in and dig in to the fun.

I think the girls would have fun with a simple craft at the tables. I've had success with letting them decorate their own cupcakes instead of having 1 big cake. Foam crafts from the hobby store also work well - we decorated foam visors with foam letters and shapes and little gems and feathers . . . for a girl twist, if you turn the visors upside down, they look like tiaras.

Hope you have a great time!!

The kids will be very disappointed if you do not let your 5-year-old open gifts at the party. The kids are all so excited about the gifts that they brought and they are very proud about the fact that that is their gift. If you want to do "thank-yous" have a little goodie bag that has a Thank You in it already. Then you don't have to be toy specific.
If you are having 20 kids that will take up a lot of time. Especially if you have your child open up one gift and then say thank you to the kid it is from. I would not leave that important party part out.

I have to agree with the other people about opening gifts. My daughter has attended a couple of parties lately where the gifts weren't even opened. That's half the fun of picking out and bringing a gift! She came home in tears the first time. To me a wedding is the only time it's not appropriate to open the gift in front of the people who brought it. My daughter thought it was rude to expect gifts but not let the kids enjoy watching their friends open the gifts. It would be crazy, but you could have each friend bring their gift one at a time to your boys, so they can open their presents together. It doesn't take more than a minute to rip off wrapping paper. It's going to be crazy anyway, but the kids will love it! So let it be crazy!

i think the kids will want to get into the gym right away, so a door prize or game would be distracting. i'd save something like that for after gym time if you do it at all.