4.5 Month Old Waking During Night, Cry for Hours

Updated on March 03, 2009
S.D. asks from Amherst, NH
13 answers

My son started sleeping through the night just before he was 3 months old and around 3.5 months went through a growth spurt and then had a cold which threw off the sleep. Now he's been over the cold for a week and a half and is waking at different times during the night crying. I know he's not hungry, I think it's just because he's overtired but doesn't know how to go back to sleep. He cries for an hour to two and nothing I do helps. Even if I do manage to get him back to sleep he'll generally wake up 30 minutes later just to start over again. He falls asleep on his own in his crib for naps and when I put him down at night so logically he should be able to do this on his own too. His pediatrician recommends settling him and then letting him go for 10-15 minutes which I've tried but like I said before nothing seems to help except letting him suck on my finger but I can't stand there all night doing that. I try the pacifier (he's not big on it even during the day) but he hates it. I am really at my wits end and am looking for advice. Thanks.

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J.M.

answers from Boston on

I think you should try feeding him. I know he used to sleep through the night, but 4.5 months is really young to do that consistently. Don't worry about any "bad habits" yet. Good luck.

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M.D.

answers from Boston on

At 4.5 months, he IS still hungry at night. This is way too young for a baby to be expected to sleep through the night without nursing or having a bottle. My son still needed to nurse a few times even at 8 months, and once until he was a year old.
Im surprised your doctor told you to just let him cry! Such a young baby, thats criminal... It is very confusing and emotionally upsetting to a young baby to be left alone to cry, on his own, in the dark. A childs needs dont go on hold just because its night time. You should still be feeding him at night, and soothing him, not just allowing him to cry. Im so sick of CIO proponents allowing children this young to cry for extended periods of time. It raises their stress hormones to dangerous levels. Its unhealthy.

2 moms found this helpful
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M.C.

answers from Boston on

Not sure if anyone else has suggested trying co-sleeping but it can work really nicely for attachment and getting babies back down quickly at night. Recent studies have shown that co-sleeping babies and mothers actually get MORE sleep than those who are separated, and SIDS risk is reduced as well. Then you could just leave your finger in while he falls asleep =)

1 mom found this helpful
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C.H.

answers from Boston on

Just another vote for co-sleeping or bringing him to bed with you rather than letinng him cry or giving him tylenol. I would think this new development could be caused by 1.) He is still hungry after all, 2.) He's teething, 3.) He's just letting you know that he wants to have contact with you. I suggest taking him to bed with you, try nursing him & if he just wants to suck on your finger, you can at least lie there with him & drop off to sleep yourself.

In my experience, napping & sleeping @ night are often very different - some babies have a much easier time with one than the other. Please don't have him cry it out, he's still very, very young. Even CIO advocates don't usually recommend it before 6 months.

1 mom found this helpful
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L.D.

answers from Boston on

take him to bed with you. i have said this time and time again to many moms. this is the best option for feeding(especially if he nurses) and getting a full night sleep. the cry it out method is cruel and your pediatrician should be ashamed of himself suggesting this for such a young baby. he still needs to eat during the night! get yourself the Baby Book by Dr. Sears and check out askdrsears.com also Mothering Magazine (an amazing magazine!) had an excellent issue on this very subject last month, check it out!

1 mom found this helpful
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L.M.

answers from Boston on

S.,

You didn't say if you have tried to feed him when he wakes up. Even if you say he has made it thru the night without feeding doesn't mean he can do it now. I don't know if he is breastfed or bottle fed but he just may need more to eat. My daughter has gone thru weeks were she didn't need to nurse during the night then she would go back to needing it again. I always thought she was growing when she needed it.

Another thought is could he be cold when he wakes up? Or too warm? It's a little difficult for us to get the heat right in our house when it gets so cold out and it seems to through my daughter's room temp off which makes it difficult for her to sleep.

He also could be teething and the pain is upsetting him. My daughter started to show signs of teething around 4 months.

You could also try some ocean type noise machine. I think Fisher Price makes one that you attach to the crib. This could help him fall back to sleep or some people like the sleep sheep.

Good luck,
L. M

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J.H.

answers from Burlington on

Have you had him checked for an ear infection? Those often crop up after a cold and can cause pain or discomfort especially at night. This happened with my now ten month old son and he had no other signs of illness like a fever or anything, just the night waking and crying. Good luck!

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R.K.

answers from Springfield on

4.5 months is still young to be expected to sleep all night every night especially if you say he just had a growth spurt he maybe want to eat try feeding him if he isn't interested than perhaps he is teething both of my boys started around this age I would also want to rule out an ear infection since he just got over a cold. If he's teething a little tylenol before bed might help. I know a lot of people start baby food around 4months is he on any yet something he's eating might be giving him a stomach ache.

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A.P.

answers from Boston on

I would guess that if you are sure he isn't hungry (he doesn't eat if you feed him?) then it must be teething. Try some baby tylenol. Though my babies have all needed a meal at night until much past 4.5 months so that would be my guess.

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L.S.

answers from New London on

My son was teething at this age and cried for hours. Try some baby tylenol.

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Z.G.

answers from Boston on

I'm a first time Mom to a 4mos old girl - so I understand! We've been going thru very similar issues.
Check out "Healthy Sleep Habits, Healthy Child" by Dr Marc Weissbluth. Changed everything for us. Also, check out parentsconnect website for info directly and in real time from the author: http://www.parentsconnect.com/connect/boards/bootcamp/kid...
Good luck!

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S.K.

answers from New London on

You could try different types of pacifiers. My second daughter would take only one kind and in silicone only.
I went through a similar situation with her and I know how frustrating it is. I can honestly say though- that with both of my girls I noticed that as soon as a situation was too much to handle- like the night waking- it would change or get better.
This will pass soon- he'll figure out how to settle himself. You can just let him cry for a little while like the Dr. said; but I couldn't do that. I'd just do my best to calm my daughter. It was only a few weeks and she was sleeping well again.
Just hang in there. It will get better.
-S.

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L.K.

answers from Boston on

Hi S.,

That stinks that little man is having a hard time. It took us 4-5 binkies to find one that Jakob would take. I just wanted to defend your letting him cry. Claire, the nurse from the SNHMC Mom's group says it is fine to let a baby cry for a bit after 4 months of age. That is probably a lot harder on you than it is on him. Also, sometimes babies just cry...

I wonder if he has a belly ache or gas... maybe some low heat on his belly would help. Let me know how it goes..

See you this weekend.

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