4 Year Old Wetting on Self

Updated on October 23, 2008
P.L. asks from Saint Joseph, MO
15 answers

My four year (he just turned 4 three weeks ago) has started wetting himself. For the last few days he has had an accident at school and peed the bed at night. Is this normal.

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J.V.

answers from Topeka on

Yes, it's normal. On average, boys do not COMPLETELY potty train until the age of 6 due to their bladder growth. He may continue to have problems off and on even up to age 8. Just use pull-ups with him or send an extra pair of clothes. It's no big deal. Don't ridicule him or make him feel bad about it. Just explain to him that he needs to get to the potty as soon as he feels like he needs to pee.

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J.L.

answers from Springfield on

I wouldn't worry too much. It is possible that he would have a UTI, but that's not as common in boys as girls. It's more likely a growth spurt or a change in routine that has this happening. I have a 5 year old boy in KG, he has nighttime wetting problems, always has. Daytime he is generally okay, occasionally he dribbles before he makes it to the bathroom, but just this morning he had an accident on the bus (I work at the school thank goodness, and the teacher had a bag of extra clothes available...Whew!!) It just happens sometimes. My 8 year old daughter still has nightime problems, dry for a week, then wet for a month, then dry a day or two then, wet a week... We've tried the meds and they didn't work for her consistantly. The doctor said it's an underdeveloped bladder and sound sleeping. I know of kids who had night time problems until they were 12... I'd just pay attention to his habits. See if anything has changed. Watch caffine intake and limit fluids after supper. Good luck.

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R.K.

answers from St. Louis on

In addition to growth and possible medical explanations, he could also just get too busy to go potty. At this age, going on the potty is no longer a big deal or something fun and new. Now it's something that interrupts things that are more fun or interesting. Four-year-olds often put off going potty because they are afraid that if they leave their friends and the activiity, they'll miss out on something. I remember my next door neighbor girl when she was that age, on several occasions, while playing in my backyard, holding herself, even squatting down and pushing her heel on her pee hole to keep from peeing her pants - but not running home, right next door! She was just hoping the urge would pass so she could keep playing! Once, when I saw her do this, I told her to go home and go potty and she said she didn't have to. I scooped her up and ran her home and she peed on way! If this is what's happening, you have to let your child know that he has to go potty even if he's having fun, and if he doesn't take a few minutes go go potty, and he wets his pants, he doesn't get to go back to playing.

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S.D.

answers from Topeka on

I have a 5 yr old son he has been potty trained since he was a little over 3 and only wet the bed a few times and now since the weather change he has wet himself being so busy at papa's house he peed his pants and in in his bed not bad enough to soak but I have to remind him to ask to use the potty he doesn't like to unless i'm around and he's at home he is now able to use the public bathroom to poop we are still working on going at school at this has to bee done before all day kindergarten next year.I would keep track of what he is drinking and how many times he has to potty or wets himself.But I hear that some kids arent compelety trained till later.Ask if it hurts to potty and if yes call your dr to rule out infection UTI

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R.G.

answers from Kansas City on

It is normal for children that are having growing spurts to wet the bed. It may happen for a while... it might be for a night. The badder is one of the last organs to grow as the rest of the body grows... unlike the stomach which is one of the first organs to develope due to the simple fact it helps the body grow. Take it easy... so shame in it. Talk to your son about what is going on and that for a while we might need some pull ups and if he needs to go to the bathroom, Don't wait.

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A.Y.

answers from Wichita on

Sure it is! Just talk to him about it. But be gentle so as not to embarass him. Ask him if something is bothering him or maybe there's a problem at school. My kids have different ways of telling me when something is wrong and they don't know how to put it into words.

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K.C.

answers from La Crosse on

Has there been any changes in his life that may be causing him some stress, or any changes in your life that is causing you stress that he may be picking up on? Kids are sensitive like that.

Has he been sick? He may be coming down with something. Or maybe he is afraid he may be missing something if he takes time to go use the bathroom or feels he is too busy. There are so many possible reasons why he may be doing this.

Talk to him, ask questions to help determine what may be going on. Then you can determine, if he needs help from a doctor, or if it is something that the two of you can work through together. It is better that you ask the questions, he may be afraid to answer the doctor later.

Good luck!

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M.F.

answers from St. Louis on

Hi, I read alot. And if your child who is potty trained starts bed wetting. There is something going on.
A. The child is tuning in on family problems.
B. The child is being exposed to new life changing situations, like moving or a new sibbling.
C. Someone is treating your child wrong. ******please talk to him. Abuse can be mentally ,physical, or even the worst child molesting.
I would start examinating everthing.

D. It could be an infection, like bladder infection or something like that. I would call the doctor and maybe have a test done.

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S.P.

answers from Kansas City on

My daughter has a UTI history, so this might not apply to what is happening to your son, but you may ask him if he has urgency to pee and can't make it to bathroom, or if it hurts to pee. Has he had any type of fever recently? I am not a doctor, but i know when my daughter has an infection she has accidents at school, home, and she gets up twice a night to pee.

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S.H.

answers from Kansas City on

Hi! My son started doing the same thing right around when he turned 4. His pediatrician said this is normal because their bodies are growing faster than their bladders, so they can't handle the amount of urine their bodies are producing. I don't know how long it takes for the bladder to catch up, but we put our son back in pull-ups at night to ease the frustration of middle-of-the-night sheet changes.

Good luck!
S.

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S.M.

answers from Kansas City on

Have him checked for a infection. When I was younger i was afraid of the dark but since hes peeing on himself during the day too ask him if hes afraid of something or afraid to ask the the teacher ??? Good Luck

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B.M.

answers from St. Louis on

Normal varies from child to child. My 4 yr old still needs a pull-up at night, because he's sleeps so deep. And not very often, but sometimes he'll wet his pants because he doesn't want to stop what he's doing and doesn't realize how badly he has to go potty. Talking with other moms, this is not so abnormal. Obviously rule out UTI, but if he doesn't have one just give him little reminders that it's OK to ask to go potty at school, maybe he is trying to wait until "bathroom break" but just can't.

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V.P.

answers from St. Louis on

Growth spurts, along with an infection, or something changing in their routine, can cause accidents. One of these, must be going on.
Good luck.
V.

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K.B.

answers from Wichita on

Good Morning P., It is very normal at some time or another. Our preschooler (3 1/2 gr son) hasn't wet him self but he has started waiting so long to go poop he had 3 accidents yesterday. He knows if he does it at school ( poop) teacher will help but not if he poops his pants. They have to be completely trained to go.

He does wet the bed sometimes though. Goes for days without a pull up and then wets again. I asked his mom to stop his fluid intake after dinner time to just a sip before bed. Sometimes it has helped others it hasn't. She knows when he has had a night time accident cause his PJ's are off and he has on underwear.

Good Luck to you P.
K. Nana of 5

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R.M.

answers from Topeka on

I would consider the possibility that he could have a bladder infection...maybe a call to the Dr. just to see what he thinks. Is there anything else that has changed...something that would be upsetting to him??? New sibling...death of a pet...move to a new home...anything that would upset his little world???
It definitely isnt "normal"...and I would do some more investigating.

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