2Nd Shift Families??

2nd shift is my least favorite shift for hubby to be on. I'd take eve's any day! (although days are much perferred, lol). We're in a different situation since I work full time and my 4yo's in full day pre-k, but we make due with timed phone calls so DD knows that daddy's still there and special family time on the weekends. The house does seem to fall apart around me when the schedule changes, but only temporarily. I find if he's on eve's for the short term (a week or two) we just pick up when he goes back to days, lol. If it's for the long term (a few months) we flow into a new routine eventually. We can't live off of pizza and corndogs all the time after all, lol! Best of luck!

Maybe you are over thinking things. There is no easy way it can be the same everyday when you have one that goes to dayschool twice a week and the hubby works 8 days on and 6 off. Go with the flow and just try to get the baby on a good schedule for sleep and eating. My hubby worked the 2nd shift 5 days a week when my oldest was a baby. Me and the baby stayed on one schedule and my husband had his own eating/sleeping/chores schedule. I had to be alert for the baby. Currently my hubby works the graveyard shift. He gets home in the morning and is able to get the kids ready for school while I go to work. After school is out I have the kids as my job ends and I think of myself as the single mom dealing with homework and housework on an as needed basis. I do laundry on the weekends and don't stress if my house is a little messy. Schedule..... I have the kids eat the same time every night for dinner everything else we just work in. All the Scout things and school functions and birthday parties we just work in as needed. Relax a little or you will be even more stressed out! Our family enjoys spending time together at home or outside anytime it's available. We don't need a schedule to do that.

I think, and it's just my opinion, that people are to into following schdules, I know when my kids were little everyday was different and i myself liked that, because with schdules, especially was writtin in stone, the first time something does not get done it turns the whole day upside down, dinner was the only thing that i really remember have a specific time was dinner between 5:30 and 6 and kids bed time between 8:30 and 9, my husband just got off a shift where he worked from 12 noon to 9:30 pm, I did not change anything. J.

For many, many years my husband worked until late in the night (after bed's kid's bedtime) and would travel out of town a few days a week also. It would sometimes seem like a gap between him and the kids getting together for any real time, but keeping them on a "normal" routine was the best thing. My husband/their dad agreed. His schedule got much more normal and he would make it to anything possible. In the meantime, I would handle my stuff and the kids stuff without much assistance from him and I tried VERY hard to not fuss about his hours. He was working really hard to keep our family cared for and doing what he had to at the time. Sometimes you wonder what is "normal" any longer ... it's what you make it most of the time.

My family doesn't have that type of shift but a good friend of mine did; the schedule revolved around. It actually worked well for her since she's such a nightowl. For a long time her husband would be getting up at 10 p.m. to head off to work at 12 (He didn't have the off and on schedule your husband does though). Everyone would stay up late (she has two kids, a 1 yo & a 5 yo), ate with him etc. And then they just all slept late. I can rarely catch her coherent before 10 in the morning. :) But, she also didn't do daycare or preschool and didn't go anywhere if it was before noon (unless it was a doc appointment). Things have changed now though because she opened a business with another good friend (it doesn't open until 11, LOL) and her husband has now decided he wants to deliver pizzas so those hours fluctuate; he also teaches guitar. They still sleep late though!

My hubby works a rotating days (1-3) and eves (3-11) schedule. 4 on 2 off. Sometimes it is really tough when he is on eves. We are super lucky that I work FT from home, so the kiddos stay home with a babysitter while I'm in my home office working. Because of that, hubby gets to spend a bunch of time with the kids during the day when he is on eves. We always talk about how hard it is going to be for hubby and the kiddos when they are in school, because they won't see each other for 4 days straight :-(

When he is on eves, I make sure that I plan ahead. I know exactly what we will do that night. I know what I am cooking for dinner, and I put out the pots and pans and do as much ahead of time as possible so I can literally just throw it on.

My husband manages a restaurant, so often leaves for work around 1 pm and gets home after midnight, working 60+ hours/week, with no set schedule or set days off. I have a home daycare and work 50 hours/week, 7:30 am-5:30 pm Monday-Friday. It is a once-in-a-blue-moon opportunity that we actually get a day off together. There is very little opportunity for family time with our 22 month old (#2 due in April also), especially when balancing time for daily chores (steam mop main floor, one load laundry, empty and load dishwasher, cat boxes-all him, clean kitchen counters). My hubby tries to knock out as many chores as he can between 7:30 and 10:00 am when our daughter wakes up, then has breakfast with her if his work schedule allows. On nights he's home around 9:30 pm, I'll sometimes let her stay up to see him before bed since he left before she woke up. There are times when days go by that he doesn't see her awake. We try to maximize family time on weekend mornings while still sleeping in. I handle almost all big chores around the house and finish whatever daily chores my husband doesn't have time to do before work. I also do most of the errands, all cooking and handle all appointments, maintenance and bills for the household. It's incredibly hard and really sucks, frankly. I envy your ability to stay home and care for your children, your regular family time and the days off you get together. Enjoy it!

My husband works 4pm to 12 am as evening manager of a library. I work from home as a daycare provider. I'm up at 6 and usually my one 2 year old daughter is up at 7 (with any luck not earlier) so I can groom myself and finish up some chores before first child arrives at 6:30/6:45. I go about my daycare schedule with the kids until 11ish when my husband gets up. My daughter can get some alone time with him or he joins us for lunch as a big loud family of 6 (with the daycare kids). He'll come play with the kids while I hurriedly clean up the tornado that is the kitchen. Storytime together with him before all the kids get their nap. Have to make sure he gets his clothes from the rooms before I put them down for nap so he doesn't wake them. We're trying to build in some daddy daughter outings so I can get a break during the day relatively (I still have the other kids there) and our DD can get some quality one on one daddy time. Storytime at library or trip to playground and such. Harder in winter but I've gotta insist on it because I don't get a break from our daughter until she is asleep at night since he is gone for work before she wakes from nap. Once the daycare kids go home by 5 most days, then she plays or watches her tv for the day or pesters me while I try to do chores or we run errands together. We have a late dinner--sometimes it is much "lunch-like" since I tend to serve dinner like items for lunch with the daycare kids. Sometimes I cook the dinner for that night and for lunch the next day before she goes to bed or sometimes if we've been running errands I get her to bed and cook later or the next morning. I do the big housework items on the weekends for the most part. During the week, maintenance is all i can muster especially now that I'm pregnant. Hope this helps! I also make sure now that when he is home to let him watch her and get out by myself !

If you also worked (needed to leave him in charge of the kids), he would have to sleep in two blocks, most likely. But, the best sleep happens when it can be in one longer stretch. As long as you are home, could he sleep from 3 a.m. until rested, then have a normal day until time to go to work again?

My husband works a regressive schedule and finally, after 20 years, gets Sundays off. :)

Sun: off
Mon: off
Tues: 3 pm to 11pm (gets home around 11:30 b/c of commute)
Wed: 2 pm to 10 pm
Thurs: 1pm to 9 pm (or) 12noon to 8 pm
Fri: 8 am to 4 pm (or) 6:00 am to 2 pm
Sat: 7 am to 3 pm (or if the 6 am shift on Friday, then also 11pm Friday to 7 am Saturday)

It can be really hard. Sometimes I think it is getting easier for us as the kids get older and understand his work life a little more. But it is still hard, because some days he doesn't see them at all, because they are in school or gone to bed when he is home/awake and he is gone to work/asleep when they are home.
Our daily schedule is that I get up and get the kids up and get them ready for school/breakfast, drive them. I do the grocery shopping/household stuff/bills, etc... then I go get them at the end of their respective school days (not quite the same time) and bring them home or to whatever after school stuff they have (allergy appts, karate, etc). I oversee homework, get them dinner, ensure cleanliness and get them into bed each night. Then dad comes home as I am about to crawl into bed myself after taking the dog out feeding her and giving her her meds. Kids are already asleep usually...
His day: He gets up, eats something, maybe goes running, or works out, goes and does some volunteer work, or plays golf, etc.. On work days, he veg's around here or takes care of personal stuff (haircuts, etc) in the morning, or runs, whatever, until time to get showered for work. When he gets home he eats a snack before bed, watches a little TV if he still needs to wind down, or depending on which day of the week, goes straight to bed without passing "go" (his quick turnaround days).
Pretty much I deal with the house and kids. He deals with him.

It can be frustrating as the mom, too, because you feel sort of trapped in between two worlds. Two ships that pass in the night, etc... You have to really make a point to make time for each other or you'll definitely feel it in your relationship (or rather, you won't feel it... you'll just be roommates).

Good luck. It can feel very isolating when the kids are really small. Mine are 12 and 9 now, and I don't feel nearly as alone. They are actually pretty interesting growing people, and now that are like mini-adults sometimes... so we can discuss the world and news, current events, etc.. not just mind numbing story books, lol.

Hang in there. You'll be okay eventually. :)

I work 8-4 and my husband works 4-10. We have two year old twin boys. We have a normal schedule, normal dinner and bed time. Our boys sleep from 8:30 pm until 7:30 am. It's exhausting for both of us, but it allows us to raise our own children and not pay child care.

my hubby also works 2nd 1pm-11pm. we have a 19 mo and also only have one car so dd and I get all of the running around done in the a.m while dh is sleeping gym, shopping bank whatever needs to be done then we have dinner (lunch) at the table around 11:45a. Then dd spends some time playing with dada while I clean up then he is off to work at 1pm and dd goes down for her nap and our evening is usually quiet playtime, easy dinner (very light) movie bath more playtime then stories and bed at 8pm. I like having him on the off shift we do get alot packed into the day. He would not be happy on 1st he would love 3rd but he would not have the job he has currently so its a toss up. gl

well before our 2nd daughter came along he worked 4am-130pm I had the morning (we are caregivers for my MIL) I would get her up and dresses and 6am, go back to sleep till 8, then when daughter (yr old) woke up make breakfast and get her dressed and myself showered and dressed, light lunch then preschool drop off at 1145 and run errands then pick her up (or hubby would on way home). He would take a littel nap then we go outside for playtime and then dinner. MIL, then daughter down to bed, shortly after him. I would have me time then go to bed.
We had DD #2 (2 mo old) and he is now working 130pm till 1100, so he gets MIL up and dressed, I wake up w baby and woever is acvailable gets our 4 yr old dressed and we eat breakfast (I usualy get something together in crock pot at this time) light lunch then drop daughter off at preschool. He will head to work shortly after and I pick DD up, we have outside time, baths are done if needed after dinner and then bed time.
Hope this helps, its really just finding a schedule that works for your needs. Right now our 2 mo old is the priority and then $ yr old then MIl, so things fall in place by what they didtcate in that order, the olders having to be more flexable. ((HUGS))